A.M. Robinson

“curse the genetics that turn me into a lobster after one hour in the sun while everyone else gets to look like a sexy peanut.”

“I feel like I'm in one of those teen shows where a caring friend lets her naive schoolmate know that the popular guy in school is spreading rumors about her. Of course, those usually end with everyone finding out they have chlamydia instead of a vampire husband, but the concept is the same.”

“Did something happen with you and that guy Vlad at that party Friday night?"Dread creeps over my skin. "Why?""Hmm, okay. I don't really know how to put this, but...well, he was telling everybody today that you guys are dating and that you're his soul mate and that you're going to get married.""What?"”

“I would definitely want the one with the bed,' I say and then realize how that sounds. I wonder if I will ever be able to flirt intentionally, as opposed to just accidently.'Really?' he says, a little too innocently.I can do this— I can say something flirtatious and mean to. 'Or maybe not. You were always horrible at sharing your things,' I tease, but then realize that was just an insult said with an eyebrow wiggle.James leans in close enough that our arms touch and he smiles, slow and deliberate. 'I've gotten better.'I think all of my internal organs just evaporated. 'Why do you have a bed if you don't sleep?' I blurt. 'It looks new.''Yeah, that's not where I thought this conversation was going at all,' he says before settling back against the wall.”

“No one answers when I knock. But I left a cake and a card on the porch last night, and this morning when I was jogging I noticed that it was gone.""That could mean anything. Maybe raccoons took it," I suggest and then want to do a forehead smack. Discovering vampires has really thrown a wrench in my concept of reality if my first theory is cake-stealing raccoons.”

“What bothers you more?' he asks, leaning forward. 'The fact that I'm a vampire or the fact that you have me here, sitting in your bedroom, after midnight? Because I actually think it's the second one.'He flashes a toothy smile. In any other time, under any other circumstances, I would almost think that he was...'Are you flirting with me?' I ask, stunned. 'Now?'I think I see a flicker of disappointment was across his features, but it could just be a shadow. 'Please,' he says coolly. 'I was just curious. And besides, I thought the whole vampire thing was supposed to be sexy. I just wanted to make sure you weren't going to start giggling and twirling your hair.”

“That's it, I think, crumpling the pages into one tiny ball of suck. I'm done banging my head against this stone wall; I don't care if I have to begin my article, "Vlad likes three things: fencing, himself, and killing off his siblings." I don't care if I have to lie and —oops— report that Vlad likes finger painting with dolphin blood in his spare time. We're now entering full investigative mode.”

“Please don't tell your family that I'm here," he says softly. "I want to keep a low profile.""Done," I say, knowing that the story of how I got caught peeping in his back window like a weirdo will be an easy secret to keep.”