Brian K. Vaughan

“I mean, do you know what you get when you call a suicide hotline in New York city? A busy signal. Literally.”

“Happy endings are bullshit. There are only happy pauses.”

“…though queens are a particular obsession of mine. I’m not speaking of European sovereigns, mind you, but that most glorious force of the chessboard. Did you know her square was originally occupied by a male “vizier,” able to advance only one meager diagonal step per move? But during the reign of the great female monarchs, this piece metamorphosed into a “queen,” and her power grew commensurate with her title. Only then did the game become something more— A mental odyssey that helped reshape the world.”

“Sai, negli ultimi mesi ho mangiato tante di quelle pesche in scatola, che ieri notte ho praticamente cacato una crostata.”

“...capitalism may be the unequal distribution of wealth, socialism is the equal distribution of poverty.”

“Come back with a healthy monkey, or don't come back at all.”

“Forgive me if I don't take relationship advice from a dead teenager missing her vagina.”

“Once upon a time, each of us was somebody's kid. Everyone had a father, even if he never provided anything more than his seed.Everyone had a mother, even if she had to leave us on a stranger's doorstep.No matter how we're eventually raised, all of our stories begin the exact same way.They all end the same, too.”

“Well, robots are, of course, the monkey's natural enemy.”

“My mom once told me that a good relationship isn't where the other person makes you feel better, but where they make *you* better.”

“Just go out there and get your heart broken in, so it'll be ready when you really need it.”

“Childbirth has always been a dangerous undertaking, but at least I've managed to eliminate the most painful part of the process.What's that? Sex?Love.”

“I'm not afraid of the world. I'm afraid of a world without you.”

“Gert: What... what just happened?Chase: I don't know, but guess who totally stole Cookie Monster's glasses!Gert: Whew, for a second there, I was worried we almost learned something.Chase: Ooo, look at me! I'm a big fluffy nerd!”

“Victor: You guys have some kind of rallying cry? You know, "Avengers assemble?" "It's clobberin' time?" "Hulk smash?"Nico: "Try not to die.”

“Okay, is anyone else worried that some of the fruit didn't fall far enough away from the tree?”

“Rock beats scissors, bitch.”

“They hurt you. You hurt 'em back. Or maybe it is the other way around. Whatever. Someday you might find a way to forgive each other. But it won't be like it used to 'cause that pain never really goes away.”

“Gert: Wake me when the fight scene's over. Kitty Pryde: Oy, tell me about it. Hey, I'm Kitty. You the token pacifist of your group? Gert: Not exactly. Pacifists are like vegans, I'm more of a vegetarian. I enjoy fish and occasional maulings.”

“No. No, first comes boyhood. You get to play with soldiers and spacemen, cowboys and ninjas, pirates and robots. But before you know it, all that comes to an end. And then, Remo Williams, is when the adventure begins.”

“Sure, this will probably end up being another in a long line of emotionally crippling misadventures...but let's try to have some fun along the way.”

“How is it possible that our parents lied to us?""Lets see: Santa, the Tooth Fairy,the Easter bunny,um, God. You're the prettiest kid in school. This wont hurt a bit. Your face will freeze like that...""Everythings going to be alright.”