Charlotte Featherstone

“I’m still scared, still wanting to run at times when I look into your eyes and wonder how I will ever be the sort of man you deserve. I want so much to deserve you. To be worthy of a woman like you.”

“I wasn’t drunk,” Alynwick grumbled. “I tchin’ for a fight, aye, but no’ drunk.”“Careful,” Black said with some amusement, “your cultured English accent is giving way to your heathen Highland one.”

“Go to hell," she snapped, hating how he made her lose her cool elegance."Already been, my dear. The service was not up to my standards."Elizabeth and Iain.”

“The power of a kiss is a heady pleasure, one that teases the mind, warms the heart, lifts the soul and tempts the body.”

“A friend. A companion. A beautiful, passionate lover to spend the days and nights with. A woman to carry my children, a partner to share the triumphs and failures. A woman I can share my dreams with, and who will share hers with me. A woman who I can comfort and hold in times of need, and who will hold me when I am weak , and sorrowful, and in need of the sort of succor only a wife can give her husband. A woman who I so desperately want to make love to. You, Lucy, you are that woman.”

“She brought a finger to her mouth, licked it. Salt. A clean scent. Not male sweat rich with the scent of musk and masculine flesh, but something else. Something purer. Tears.“Iain?”He trembled and she could have sworn she heard his tears run down his cheeks and plop onto the pillow. “My God, Beth. I’ve seen you. I’ve seen you in my heart and in my soul.” And then he stiffened, pressed his fingers into her hips, squeezing. “Can I, Beth? Can I come inside you?”“Yes,” she murmured, holding him close, feeling hisbody shudder beneath hers. “And stay forever.”

“Oh, God, I would give anything to change the past,” he gasped. “To make it so that the last thing you saw was not me walking away from you. In your memories I am forever one and twenty, and cocky, and sneering, and looking self-righteous. And I’ve changed, Beth,” he gasped, choking on a sob he could not hide. “I want so damn much for you to see how I’ve changed. To see me now. There are no lies in my eyes. No motives other than to show you that I am not the callous man I was. And that I love you…. I love you so damn much.”He was crying. The tears trickled unchecked down his cheeks, dripping onto his lips. She touched them, wiped them away, which only caused them to spill faster and harder.”

“I’m going to cut you,” Georgiana murmured. “I’m going to mark that face of yours and show him what I’m capable of.”“He’d still love me,” Elizabeth whispered. “It’s a concept you could never understand, Georgiana.”

“...It’s always only ever been you. And it always will be, Beth. You have my heart. My love. And my regret that I am not the man you deserve.”

“She reached for his wrist, clutched it. “How do I look?”“Hurt. Pained. Destroyed.”“If I could look into your eyes, what would I see in them, Iain?”“Devastation. Shame for what I was. Hatred for the vanity and arrogance of my youth. A love for you that has never, ever died, but has only grown and matured, and become all-consuming. Tears,” he said, and pressed his face to hers so she could “see” them. “Because I know it is truly over now that the truth is out, and I don’t know how I’m going to live without you. Forgive me,” he whispered, then stole a kiss from her lips. “Forgive me, and the boy I was, and the man I turned out to be.”

“You have a wild-eyed look, my Beth. What do yousee?”“Don’t look at me,” she cried, now utterly unhinged.“Don’t look into my eyes when you can see everything in them, and I am not able to look into yours and see anything!”

“He knew how to touch her, how hard to thrust, when to roll his hips, when and how to angle himself so she could not only feel him inside her, but rubbing against her clitoris, brushing, sensitizing. The fiend knew how to make her agony last, how to suspend it until he would allow her to reach out for it and surrender.”

“Beth…Beth… He whispered her name in his mind, unwilling to break the spell that surrounded them with any sound. He did not want to hear his voice; the only sounds he desired were the soft inhalations of Beth’s breath, her sighs of pleasure, the brush of his body and hers as he loved her.She was beautiful, so perfect. He wanted to sit back and feast his eyes on her, sear her into his memory, lying like this, waiting for him.”

“You ask for too much, Iain,” she murmured. “More than I can give.”“Do I?”Movement against her made her pause, made her stiffen as she felt him press forward, felt his body shift until his back and shoulders were pressing indecently against her belly and his head was turned, the curve of his cheek lying on her lap.“Can you give me this, Beth? Just one moment to lie here and close my eyes, and feel you beneath me, soft and curved?”“And what would you find?” she asked, her voice little more than a breathless whisper.“Solace.”Closing her eyes, she bit hard on her lip, trying not to weaken against that one word. There had been no hesitation when he said it. It was as if he’d known it—what he’d desired all along, a feeling of tranquility. Peace. Rightness.Her hand hovered over his head, her fingers itching to touch, to run her fingers through his hair, which would be damp with snow. What picture did they make, seated on this bench, a tempest of white swirling around them as he laid his head in her lap?”

“She followed the melting flakes, revelling in the thickness, the softness of his hair, which he wore long. She had loved to run her fingers through it before. Tug at it in mounting pleasure. Snuggle into it in the shared intimacy of their loving.”

“I have waited for this, Beth, this moment,” he whispered as he took her hands in his and brought her fingertips to his mouth, kissing each fingertip before placing her palms on either side of his face. “When Sussex, Black and I returned from the East, I watched you as you did this—touched Sussex, then Black. And I waited, holding my breath, barely able to control my feelings, waiting to feel your touch on my face. But you did not. You made a polite enquiry after my health and left me standing alone by the hearth. And, then, the other afternoon with Sheldon, you touched him, and I was alone, and apart again. Remembering what it was like to await your touch, and then never to feel it. Beth,” he whispered as he moved closer to her, “won’t you touch me? See me?”

“Tilting her face back, he looked into her eyes. They were unfocused, unable to settle on his face. And the same terrifying feeling stole over him once again. An acute fear—a final, painful realization—that her world was one of utter blackness. At last he realized the magnitudeof her blindness. He couldn’t imagine never seeing her again.It was like a death, the inevitable conclusion when someone was gone. Why it should hit him now, after all these years, he could not fathom, but it was there, and finally he understood her private hell. He’d told her he would die without sight. Selfish, arrogant bastard, concernedwith his own needs, his own perversions to watchhimself pleasure her, to study her as she accepted him, to watch their bodies joined. How carelessly he had said that, not thinking of Elizabeth and what she would die for. What she wanted in this life.”

“The crimson satin lining gleamed in the firelight, and so, too, did his eyes. When he looked up at her, there was a mist to them once again.“Little magpie,” he whispered as he looked at the black onyx ring. “You gave up everything for this, didn’t you?”She nodded. “That is how much I trust you. Everything I had hidden away in that biscuit jar went to this. All my worldly goods are in that ring, Jude.”“Then I will take it and hold it close, and never give you cause for regret.” He put the ring on his index finger, and Isabella grinned. How perfect it looked—how utterly sensual. She wanted that ringed hand on her body, comforting her. Loving her.”

“Am I to die?” I asked, and he stopped, raised our joined hands to his mouth and gently kissed my knuckles. “You are, my love, and in your sleep, you will become Death’s bride.”

“The first time I met death, it was at a ball and we danced a waltz.”

“Tis not your time, my love,” he whispered. “You will not die tonight.” “Never,” I said to him, “for I have been blessed by Death’s Eternal Kiss.”

“What did you discover about the shooter?” Jude asked as he struggled to sit upright.“Once I spotted him on the rooftop, I ran up the back stairs to follow him. He was long gone, but he left something behind,” Sussex said.“Oh?”“Yes, I’ll take it upon myself to investigate it.”Jude opened his eyes, his stare focused on the duke. “Do you need my help?”Alynwick snorted. “A soiled dove with a broken wing,” he drawled. “What use would you be?”Jude grumbled, “I’ll be fine by the morning.”

“You kissed me, and I opened my eyes and thought you were Death. You were the most beautiful thing I had ever seen, and I clung to the memory of you because it gave me comfort—the only bit of happiness I had ever had. You were my secret fantasy, my lover. My story… Lord Death is you, and the woman he stalks…is me.”“Why have you come,” he asked, “when you now know the truth?”“Because when you saved me, you forged a link between us. I don’t believe it will ever break.”“Bella,” he whispered, “I couldn’t allow you to take your life. Couldn’t bear the thought of existing in a world that you did not.”

“It is not your time, love. You will not die tonight.All this time she thought herself in love with the notion of Death. His gallantry, his beautiful soul. She believed he loved her because he had spared her from his grip. But it had not been Death, but Black.“Why?” she asked, and her body shook, knowing his sacrifice, knowing he knew her most guarded secret.“Because I loved you,” he murmured. “I couldn’t let you go, because I knew I could no longer see you, I couldn’t live, either.”Black had risked his life to save her from taking her own.He rose, helped her up and clutched her in his arms. “It is too soon for you to make your decision,” he said. “Come to me when you know what you want. My wishes will remain unchanged.”“What do you want?”He kissed her, pressed her body into his hot, hard one. “To be inside you. To lay you out and touch you with my hands, my mouth and tongue. I want to slip deep inside you and never leave. I want to wake up in the morning and open my eyes to find you lying there next to me. I want to look at my children and see you in their little faces.”“Jude,” she whispered, holding him, weakening.“But I want you to want that as much as I do, Isabella.”“We have too many secrets,” she began. “Our pasts…”“Secrets, like passion, are meant to be spent. I will bear all my sins, all my secrets, when you come to me. It’s all I can offer. You see, little love, I’m afraid, too, but the difference between us is that I believe it’s worth it to face that fear if it means that I’ll have you.”

“Jude,” she whispered as she touched his face. “I’m so frightened of this. This bind that links us. It whispers to me to take what you’re offering, but I fear the consequences. I have lived the consequences.”His fingertips traced the column of her throat down over the swells of her breasts where they lingered until her breath caught. “I am not your father, Isabella, and you are not your mother.”“I know, but—”“There are no certainties in life,” he murmured as he lowered his head and kissed the apex of her breast where her heart hammered so hard. “But I can give you this certainty. I love you. And I want you. I have wanted you for so long, and that feeling has only grown. There must be trust between us, Isabella. Passion is not enough for me. I want more from you.”“You ask for so much,” she said, then trailed off.“Not any more than I am offering you.”

“Good evening, Miss Fairmont.”She saw Black sprawled out in a wingback chair, jacketless, the white shirt he wore unbuttoned to the waist, revealing an enticing view of his chest and the fine black hair that was hidden beneath. “I was beginning to wonder if you would come tonight. It is midnight after all.”On cue the large pendulum clock in the hall began to chime out the hour. Isabella met his gaze, marveled at the dark layers in his eyes. He appeared at once indolent, yet supremely masculine, and in his state of dishabille he was utterly breathtaking.”

“Black would trust her with his secrets. He would protect hers. But did she trust him with her heart? Could she?She thought of Wendell, and no longer felt any remorse for her feelings. She did not love him. Her heart had been taken two years ago, by a stranger she thought she had conjured up in the atmosphere of her imagination.He had asked her to trust him—and there was only one way she knew how. She reached into the wardrobe and pulled out the crimson gown.No regrets. No seduction. No scandal. Only love.”

“I’ll come back to you,” he whispered, not meaning to say it out loud. “And I will ravish you over breakfast, and I will never leave you alone another night of my life.”

“Clasping her to him, he hugged her for a long while and she felt his guilt and fear subside. “Do you want to see something very special—something magical?”Giggling she whispered, “You already showed me that this morning.”He swatted her bottom. “Minx! Not that!”

“She saw him as a boy, standing in the kitchen, his clothes tattered and torn, his dark hair in need of a cut and taming. In his dirty hands he held out the bed to her, his only words,“For you.”

“My dearest Lucy,” he said, his gaze never wavering from hers, “I would die for you.”

“Pearls, because your skin is as smooth and luminescent as one, and because the first time my lips caressed your throat I thought your flesh as opulent and lushas one. Gold,” he whispered, moving closer, “because it reminded me of how your hair looked in the dyingcandlelight, how it burned and glistened, and how badly I want to lie in bed, in our chamber, and watch you at your dressing table, unpinning it for me. I will have that, Lucy, therights of a husband to enter his wife’s room, to see her at her toilette, to watch what no other man will ever begranted. You do understand that? That I won’t settle for less?”“You have made your line in the sand very clear.”He grinned. “You can cross it anytime you wish, you know. You might even like it on my side.”

“No, by God, you’ve accused me of coldness, but howcan you, when you can feel how hot my body is againstyours? You’ve said I have none of the red-blooded passionof my sex, but you don’t know. You,” he gasped, pressingagainst her with a hard thrust of his hips, “you will know it—the depth of my passion. But you will.”

“Everywhere you are, I will be. Everywhere you go, I willgo. I will follow you into your dreams, stay while you sleep,watch while you eat.”That sinful bottom lip touched hers, then played with it,brushing it, tugging on it, parting her mouth as if he had allthe time in the world to play and coax. “I will be the very airyou breathe.”

“How will I accomplish such a thing?” he said, and herlashes fluttered closed as his bottom lip scraped gently upthe curve of her chin. “I’ll be everywhere you are. Your veryshadow.”

“BEYOND THE MIST, the darkness and shadow, he waits, reaching out through a veil of gossamer threads—‘yourfuture,’ he whispers, ‘your destiny’.”

“I am Kian.” “Mercy ” she replied. Swallowing hard she forced her gaze away from him. She was being too bold in her perusal but she could not stop looking at him. “Kindness ” he whispered. Their eyes locked and Mercy felt a jolt of some foreign but not unwelcome sensation pierce her. “I could use some of you”he said thoughtfully as his cool gaze devoured her. “Most definitely I could use you.”He rose and walked around the pond perusing her body as he came to stand beside her. “The milk of human kindness how sweet the taste.”He actually licked his lips and Mercy shivered her core heating and wetting. Then he lowered himself until they were eye to eye. “I believe I could drink you dry.”

“Look your fill ” the creature murmured his voice as sweet and rich as syllabub sauce. And his lusty grin when he said it was sinful—and pleasurable. Prue was certain her face flamed red at the barbarian’s insinuation. “I’m sure I don’t know what you mean ” she replied tartly. He smiled and drained his goblet. His head was tilted back exposing the thick cords in his throat and Prue watched him eagerly drink down the entire contents in one swallow. Never had she seen such a vulgar display. Never had she been so engrossed in the workings of a man’s throat and the movement of his Adam’s apple. With a thunk he set the goblet down and shoved his chair back. His legs were spread and the black leather riding britches he wore were pulled snugly over his massive thighs…and other parts as well. Flushing Prudence glanced away. She could not look at him like that with his lace jabot untied and lying on either side of his opened shirt. A shirt that was unbuttoned and opened to his waist exposing a vast amount of dark male skin hairless and bronzed.“Shall you not look my lady ” he beckoned softly. “I like the feel of your eyes on me.” “Cover yourself sir ” she demanded. “It’s most unseemly.” “Ah the lady is Temperance indeed ” the brute murmured huskily.”

“As I said, you have mistaken me for another. London is full of drab little peahens, sir. Now, then, I’m leaving,” she said in a huff.“To change?” he asked, unable to stop from goading her.“To write a poem for my toast,” she snapped. “And you may suffer, for I will not help you with yours.”“No need, darling,” Matthew drawled, his words intending to push her away.“I doubt you know a suitable word that will rhyme with fuck. ”“Stuck,” she said, turning to face him. “For two days, my lord. We are stuck with one another. Let us make the best of it.”“And how do you propose we do that?”“By giving each other wide berth. We will not stand together, we will not talk to one another and we will most certainly not look at one another.”“No problem from this quarter.”“Good. You may be assured that it will be no difficulty for me, either.”-Matthew and Jane”

“Pressing his forehead to the cool glass, he held her gaze, her palm, his eyes pleading with her. Don’t go. Don’t leave me.”

“Christ, he was empty, just a shell of himself. He had nothing to give, not even his seed.”

“I do not know what to say, how to tempt you. If you had a price, I would pay it. If you desired particular words, I would say them. I would be anything you want, Jane. Just come back. Please come back.- Matthew in a letter to Jane.”

“Why?” he screamed, letting the noise bellow out loud and ferocious. “Why can I not have some measure of peace?” he questioned.”

“Matthew,” she murmured, her voice breaking. “How can I save you?”

“Matty,” Jane whispered, “what are you thinking?”He smiled, kissed her navel before glancing up at her. “Barbaric thoughts.”“You’re very pleased with yourself, aren’t you?”He laughed and slid up the length of her body. “I am. It’s such a powerfulvisual to know that my seed is responsible for the life within you and theincredibly arousing changes in your body.“And, I, of course, have nothing to do with it?”“Jane,” he whispered, “let me have my moment of male glory.”

“As he looked around the huge ducal bed,he saw everything that meant the world to him.Outside the sky was darkening and the snow was falling. Through mistyeyes, Matthew looked up, saw the moon glowing brilliantly and whispered,“thank you.”It was simple, but heartfelt. Never had a man been more grateful than thatvery moment when everything was utter perfection. With his family and his wifepressed up against him.”

“As he clutched her in his shaking hands and wept against her, he whispered into her ear, the words that made him believe. “Love bears all things. Endures all things,” he said. “Ours has, hasn’t it?” She nodded and held him tighter. “But can it endure this, Anais? This demon who holds me so mercilessly in its claws?”She touched his face and kissed him. “My love can and will, Lindsay. I will be here when you open your eyes. I will give you whatever you need to make it more bearable.”

“She glared at him through tear-filled eyes. “You talk of your pain? You cannot even begin to understand the sacrifice I have made. I gave away a piece of myself, my soul! But I did it out of love, never think otherwise. I made the choice to live my life without her because I knew in my heart she would be better off without me and I could not bear to know that a life created out of such perfect love would be forced to live with the ugly truth of her birth. I thought,” she sobbed, breaking down before him. “I thought…I did the right thing.”

“Wallingford vaulted up from his chair. “You’ve come here so that I can mollify you and share in your belittling of Anais? Well, you’ve knocked on the wrong bloody door, Raeburn, because I will not join you in disparaging Anais. I will not! Not when I know what sort of woman she is—she is better than either of us deserves. Damn you, I know what she means to you. I know how you’ve suffered. You want her and you’re going to let a mistake ruin what you told me only months ago you would die for. Ask yourself if it is worth it. Is your pride worth all the pain you will make your heart suffer through? Christ,” Wallingford growled, “if I had a woman who was willing to overlook everything I’d done in my life,every wrong deed I had done to her or others, I would be choking back my pride so damn fast I wouldn’t even taste it.”Lindsay glared at Wallingford, galled by the fact his friend— the one person on earth he believed would understand his feelings—kept chastising him for his anger, which, he believed, was natural and just.“If I had someone like Anais in my life,” Wallingford continued, blithely ignoring Lindsay’s glares, “I would ride back to Bewdley with my tail between my legs and I would do whatever I had to do in order to get her back.”“You’re a goddamned liar! You’ve never been anything but a selfish prick!” Lindsay thundered. “What woman would you deign to lower yourself in front of? What woman could you imagine doing anything more to than fucking?”Wallingford’s right eye twitched and Lindsay wondered if his friend would plant his large fist into his face. He was mad enough for it, Lindsay realized, but so, too, was he. He was mad, angry—all but consumed with rage, but the bluster went out of him when Wallingford spoke.“I’ve never bothered to get to know the women I’ve been with. Perhaps if I had, I would have found one I could have loved—one I could have allowed myself to be open with. But out of the scores of women I’ve pleasured, I’ve only ever been the notorious, unfeeling and callous libertine—that is my shame.Your shame is finding that woman who would love you no matter what and letting her slip through your fingers because she is not the woman your mind made her out to be. You have found something most men only dream of. Things that I have dreamed of and coveted for myself. The angel is dead. It is time to embrace the sinner, for if you do not, I shall expect to see you in hell with me. And let me inform you, it’s a burning, lonely place that once it has its hold on you, will never let you go. Think twice before you allow pride to rule your heart.”“What do you know about love and souls?” Lindsay growled as he stalked to the study door.“I know that a soul is something I don’t have, and love,” Wallingford said softly before he downed the contents of his brandy, “love is like ghosts, something that everyone talks of but few have seen. You are one of the few who have seen it and sometimes I hate you for it. If I were you, I’d think twice about throwing something like that away, but of course, I’m a selfish prick and do as I damn well please.”“You do indeed.”Wallingford’s only response was to raise his crystal glass in a mock salute.“To hell,” he muttered,“make certain you bring your pride. It is the only thing that makes the monotony bearable.”

“She had his dark hair, his lashes, and from the glimpse he had, she bore his eyes, as well. But the shape of her face, a perfect oval, was her mother’s. She had Anais’s cheeks. Anais’s lovely mouth and proud chin. He kissed her chin, feeling the softest of fluttering against his cheek—baby’s breath. There was nothing sweeter than the feel of an innocent child’s breath against one’s cheek—nothing more wondrous than knowing that the baby was your own flesh and blood.Mina stretched against him, yawning widely and throwing her arms up wide alongside her head. He laughed through his tears and reached for her little fist and brought it to his mouth, kissing her with such love he thought he would die of it. “You will consume me, little Mina, just as your mother has.”-Linsay to his infant daughter.”