Chuck Palahniuk

“What do you do when your entire identity is destroyed in an instant? How do you cope when your whole life story turns out to bw wrong?”

“The damaged love the damaged. True fact.”

“That's the big letdown you'll notice about filming a movie: No underline music. No mood music.”

“By that she means fully erect. Condom-ready.”

“These dudes, clutching their little gifts, for them today is their kind-of-honeymoon.”

“The way to get a babe to act in a blue movie is you offer her a million dollars. The way to get a dude is you just have to ask him.”

“This is your life, and it's ending one minute at a time.”

“Folks build a reputation by attacking you while you’re alive - or praising you after you ain’t.”

“A child who is disillusioned abruptly, by his peers or siblings, being ridiculed for his faith and imagination, may choose never to believe in anything- tangible or intangible- again. To never trust or wonder.”

“This isn't about guilt or innocence, he says. The dinosaurs weren't morally good or bad, but they're all dead.”

“The liberator who destroys my property is fighting to save my spirit. The teacher who clears all possessions from my path will set me free.”

“These distraction-oholics. These focus-ophobics.”

“Everything sounds so much better when it comes out of a man's mouth”

“Because supposedly those who forget the past are condemned to repeat it.”

“I think that I shall never see a poem as lovely as a hot-gushing, butt-cramping, gut hosing orgasm.”

“You are not special. Your are not a beautiful or unique snowflake. You are the same decaying organic matter as everything else.”

“It’s weird to think the place where we’re standing will only be a point in the sky.”

“You’ve thrown down the gauntlet. You’ve brought my wrath down upon your house. Now, to prove that I exist I must kill you. As the child outlives the father, so must the character bury the author. If you are, in fact, my continuing author, then killing you will end my existence as well. Small loss. Such a life, as your puppet, is not worth living.But… If I destroy you and your dreck script, and I still exist… then my existence will be glorious, for I will become my own master.”

“How miserably hypocritical, you might say, but no sooner am I offered a chance to flee Hell than I yearn to stay. Few families hold their relations as closely as do prisons. Few marriages sustain the high level of passion that exists between criminals and those who seek to bring them to justice. It’s no wonder the Zodiac Killer flirted so relentlessly with the police. Or that Jack the Ripper courted and baited detectives with his - or her - coy letters. We all wish to be pursued. We all long to be desired.”

“A guy's calling to say he's failing algebra II.Just as a point of practice, I say, Kill yourself.A woman calls and says her kids won't behave.Without missing a beat, I tell her, Kill yourself.A man calls to say his car won't start.Kill yourself.A woman calls to ask what time the late movie starts.Kill yourself.She asks, "Isn't this 555-1327? Is this the Moorehouse CinePlex?I say, Kill yourself. Kill yourself. Kill yourself.”

“And the more she could imagine this island, the less she liked the real world. The more she could imagine the people, the less she liked any real people.”

“I'm not so much a good friend as I'm the savior who wants you to worship him forever.”

“It's just the biggest mistake I could think to make”

“I am my own rakish seducer. I do serve as my own surly, brutish bounder.”

“And if you can find any way out of our culture, then that's a trap too. Just wanting to get out of the trap reinforces the trap.”

“This is our world now, and those ancient people are dead.”

“‎A different toothbrush waits in every time zone.”

“Disperse your menacing armies! And relinguish your delicious stores of Nestle Crunch bars.”

“You think maybe if you just work harder and faster, you can hold off the chaos, but then one day you’re changing a patio light bulb with a five-year life span and you realize how you’ll only be changing this light maybe ten more times before you’ll be dead.”

“A salacious lie will always trump a noble truth.”

“Me, personally, I tell dude 137 how I'm adding an embossed slogan to my dildos. Cast in high-relief going around the base, it's going to say, "The Dick That Killed Cassie Wright..." On the thickest part, so if you twist it the letters of the writing stimulate the clit.”

“The previous Madison Spencer would bother to hold their frightened hand, to calm and comfort them. Who I am now, however, I tell them to cry me a stinking shit river and fall down dead, already.”

“It's obsequious little nicety-nice girls like me who allow assholes to run the world: Miss Harlot O'Harlots, billionaire phony tree huggers, hypocrite drug-snorting, weed-puffing peace activists who fund the mass-murdering drug cartels and perpetuate crushing poverty in dirt-poor banana republics. It's my petty fear of personal rejection that allows so many true evils to exist. My cowardice enables atrocities.”

“Death is a long process," Archer says. "Your body is just the first part of you that croaks." Meaning: Beyond that, your dreams have to die. Then your expectations. And your anger about investing a lifetime in learning shit and loving people and earning money, only to have all that crap come to basically nothing. Really, your physical body dying is the easy part. Beyond that, your memories must die. And your ego. Your pride and shame and ambition and hope, all that Personal Identity Crap can take centuries to expire.”

“If the living are haunted by the dead, then the dead are haunted by their own mistakes.”

“If you died right now, how would you feel about your life?”

“Not that I’m crazy or anything, I just want some proof that death isn’t the end. Even if crazed zombies grabbed me in some dark hall one night, even if they tore me apart, at least that wouldn’t be the absolute end. There would be some comfort in that.”

“We opened our hearts. Hear me, heal me, save me, believe me.”

“The truth doesn't glitter and shine.”

“Our purest form of joy comes when people we envy get hurt. That most genuine form of joy.”

“The truth is that all this was just part of the suicide process. Because tanning and steroids are only a problem if you plan to live a long time.Because the only difference between a suicide and a martyrdom really is the amount of press coverage. If a tress falls in the forest and nobody is there to hear it, doesn’t it just lie there and rot? And if Christ had died from a barbiturate overdose, alone on the bathroom floor, would He be in Heaven This wasn’t a question of whether I was going to kill myself. This, this effort, this money and time, the writing team, the drugs, the diet, the agent, the flights of stairs going up to nowhere, all this was so I could off myself with everyone’s full attention.”

“We want you, not your money. As long as you're at fight club, you're not how much money you've got in the bank. You're not your job. You're not your family, and you're not who you tell yourself. You're not your name.You're not your problems.You're not your age.You are not your hopes. You will not be saved. We are all going to die, someday.”

“It's not enough to be numbered with the grains of sand on the beach and the stars in the sky.”

“How Tyler saw it was that getting God's attention for being bad was better than getting no attention at all. Maybe God's hate is better than His indifference.If you could be either God's worst enemy or nothing, which would you choose?We are God's middle children, according to Tyler Durden, with no special place in history and no special attention.Unless we get God's attention, we have no hope of damnation or redemption. Which is worse, hell or nothing?Only if we're caught and punished can we be saved.”

“I can become someone else, not out of pressure and desperation, but merely because a new life sounds fun or interesting or joyful.”

“Really, just looking around, you feel a twinge of pity for the poor souls who succeeded in getting past the Pearly Gates. One can't help but picture the lackluster VIP lounge in Heaven, a kind of nonalcoholic ice-cream social starring Harriet Beecher Stowe and Mahatma Gandhi. Hardly anyone's idea of a "with-it" social register.”

“If you're male, and you're Christian and living in America, your father is your model for God. And sometimes you find your father in your career.”

“Everything is still falling apart.”

“Prepare to evacuate soul in five, in four, three, two, one.”

“Only in death will we have our own names since only in death are we no longer part of the effort. In death we become heroes.”