Cindy Vine

“Wounds do eventually heal after a fashion, even emotional ones. What seems bad one day, is not quite as bad a year from now.”

“Sometimes I think I’m still a child trapped in a woman’s body.”

“Nobody can help me, those are my secrets, scarring my soul just as surely as that razor blade scarred my thighs all those years ago.”

“I look all-woman on the outside, but inside I’m empty. Dead. A vast space of nothingness.”

“Well you should care. About my past, I mean. Because who I am today is based on who I was, and what happened to me. You are in love with who you think I am, not the real me. Not the me who is broken inside.”

“Gandhi once said, you are the change you want to see in the world. But I have to ask, how do you bring about the change in you? Because it stands to reason, first you have to change before you can change the world. Your beliefs have to change, because your beliefs influence your behavior and your daily interactions with others. Changing oneself is not easy. First, you have to admit that there are parts of you which need changing. Many of us do not want to admit that we are less than perfect, that we might have facets of our personality which needs change. Change is hard, so most of us give up before we start. But if things aren’t right in our lives, we need to look at what part of us we can change to make it right.”

“Betrayal eats into you like maggots on road-kill. Forgiveness is an illusion, because you can never forget what was done to you. You’re stuck in that moment; you haven’t got 4 x 4 in your car, so there’s no moving on away from the deep pit of sadness and hurt. It dominates your every thought, every waking moment, dragging you down.”

“Is it possible to want something so badly that you yearn for it and let it dominate your every thought, but at the same time it terrifies you and makes you tremble with fear at the very idea of it?”

“I have perfected the art of the fake smile. Inside your heart may be bruised and black, but outwardly you look bright and happy.”

“He smiles but I note that it doesn’t reach his eyes. I hit a nerve there and I smile smugly to myself. If I was looking for a sign from God whether or not I should tell him my secrets, the awful things that happened to me, then that lie from the good doctor was the sign I was looking for. How can you trust someone who lies to you about something so stupid as dyeing their hair? Would you share your deepest darkest secrets with them? I think not.”

“You see what you want to see, and it might not be the same as someone else.”