Erlend Loe

“One problem with people is that as soon as they fill a space it's them you see and not the space. Large, desolate landscapes stop being large, desolate landscapes once they have people in them. They define what the eye sees. And the human eye is almost always directed at other humans. In this way an illusion is created that humans are more important than those things on earth which are not human. It's a sick illusion.”

“I still don't know if things fit together, or if everything will be all right in the end. But I believe that something means something. I believe in cleansing the soul through fun and games. I also believe in love. And I have several good friends, and just one bad one.”

“We shall never meet, but there is something I want you to know. My time is not the same as your time. Our times are not the same. And do you know what that means? That means that time does not exist. Do you want me to repeat that? There is no time. There is a life and a death. There are people and animals. Our thoughts exist. And the world. The universe, too. But there is no time. You might as well take it easy. Do you feel better now? I feel better. This is going to work out. Have a nice day.”

“It's good for me to see so many other people who are not me. That there are so many others. I feel affection for them. Most of them are doing the best they can. I am also doing the best I can.”

“I feel I am on a high. For the first time in a very long while I have a feeling that anything can happen. This morning I woke up thinking everything could happen, that things would just come to me, and that they would be good.”

“The only question that really counts, must be thins one: are things getting better or are they getting worse?”

“The only thing I can be sure of at any given time is what I am thinking myself. I have no idea what the others are thinking. Do they think space is big and dangerous? I do. What do they believe in? I think nobody ought to be alone. That one should be with someone. With friends. With the person one loves. I think it is important to love. I think it's the most important thing.”

“I don't think I am any different from other people. I have the same dreams. I want a family. I want a house. A car. Why shouldn't I want that? Everybody does. And when I have it, I want it all to work.”

“I think I'm more concerned with things that are very big and things that are very small than with all the stuff in between.”

“I don't want all that much. But I want to be fine. I want to live a simple life with many good moments and a lot of fun.”

“I had been wading up to my neck in all this niceness for years. I woke up to it, went to sleep in it. I breathed niceness and slowly it was killing me.”

“I have enough trouble with useful information, never mind being burdened with what is useless.”

“When the universe is ephemeral, one can easily feel that human existence is meaningless. Why should I do anything at all?On the other hand it is tempting to try and make the best of it. I'm here, anyway. The imagination won't cope if I try to picture where I'd otherwise be.”

“Any ideas I might have had about eternal life are sort of getting stuck in the throat. But it doesn't seem to bother me. Not now. On the contrary, I feel more alive than in a long while. Suddenly it feels good to have a deadline to relate to. As a matter of fact, I've always worked well under pressure.”

“There are too many confusing things present. Things I know. Thoughts I have. Sarcasm. Things I think I ought to be doing and places I ought to be going. Always other places.”

“I know a helluva lot.I'm not the only one who knows these things.Many people know more than I do. That's fortunately not my problem.My problem is what I am supposed to use it for.What do I do with it?It's confusing.”

“What I could really use is an older man. A mentor. One who could tell me how things fit together.He would have asked me to do chores that I felt were meaningless. I would have been impatient and protested, but done them nonetheless. And eventually, after several months of hard labour, I would have realised that there was a deeper meaning behind it all, and that the master had a cunning plan all the time.”

“Something is going to have to happen. Not necessarily something big. Just something.”

“I sat there thinking this had to be the pits. I was afraid that I had become fed up with life, that I would never ever feel enthusiasm again.”

“Jedne je večeri došla kasnije nego obično. Bio sam legao. Brzo sam navukao prve gaće koje su mi se našle pod rukom. Ispostavilo se da su me baš te gaće, od svih koje sam imao, najviše izdavale. Lastiša oko butina skoro i nije bilo – praktično sam bio u suknji. Sve vreme sam morao dobro da pazim da sedim u određenom položaju i da ne ustajem naglo. Ipak mi se činilo da bi još nesrećnije rešenje bilo obući pantalone. Ona bi to naime protumačila kao signal da može da ostane, da uopšte nemam nameru da spavam i da je i moja noć bez kraja i konca.Shvatio sam koliko je ta odluka bila ispravna, i u istom trenutku uvideo da je razlika između čoveka u gaćama i čoveka u pantalonama ogromna, skoro nepojmljiva.U pantalonama si spreman za sve. Nijedan poduhvat nije nezamisliv. U gaćama si pak slobodan. Čoveka u gaćama je, na primer, teško usred noći pozvati u šetnju, što me od nje inače uopšte ne bi iznenadilo.”

“Jorden tilhører ikke mennesket.Det er menneskene, der tilhører Jorden. De duftende blomster er vore søstre, og hesten, den mægtige ørn, for ikke at tale om elgen, er vore brødre. Og hvordan kan man købe eller sælge noget som helst? For hvem ejer varmen i luften eller lyden af vinden i træerne? Og saften i grenene bærer erindringen om dem, der har levet før os. Og lyden af bækkens mumlen er er vores forfaders stemme. Og vi må lære vores børn, at jorden under deres fødder er forfædrenes akse, og at alt, hvad der overgår Jorden også overgår os, og hvis mennesket spytter på jorden, spytter det på sig selv.”

“But I would rather have snow. Snow is the on.y weather I really like. Nothing makes me less grumpy than snow. I can sit by a window for hours watching it fall. The silence of snowfall. You can use that. It's best when there's background lighting, for example a street lamp. Or when you go outside and let it flutter down on you. That's real riches, that is.”

“…I don’t wish to meet people. They disgust me. Increasingly so. But I must have milk.”

“Tata?Mm?Da smo slonovi, bili bismo pet slonova.Da.Blesavo, je l' da?Da ,jeste.Zamisli to!Da. Odlično Bertolde.Lepo.”

“Everything seemed meaningless to me. All of a sudden. My own life, the lives of others, of animals of plants, the whole world. It no longer fitted together.”

“Бадер ест яйца только от тех кур, которые видят снег в горах.”

“Både Huyn-Soo og treneren er skuffet over at han ikke vant den også, han hadde drømt om fire gull, men en canadier gikk fra ham og de forstår ikke hvordan det var mulig, jeg skjønner jo ikke hva de sier, men ser pa dem at det provoserer og irriterer dem at canadieren vant, Huyn-Soo sa wokking Canada til meg og jeg nikket fordi jeg trodde han snakket om å hente mat fra et sted som het Wok King Canada og det passet meg fint for jeg var sulten, men han snakket ikke om mat, skjønte jeg etter hvert, han forsøkte bare å si fucking Canada.”

“…Egil har altså ikke sugd det fra eget bryst, men, sier han, vi må ta i betraktning at den tiden er over. I dag er det ganske lite som kan suges helt fra eget bryst. Det er ikke mulig lenger. Folk har tenkt tankene før. Vår oppgave blir å raffinere dem.”

“Ja sam biciklista. Možda sam iznad svega biciklista. (...) Ali čovek je kao biciklista prinuđen da bude izopštenik. Prinuđen je da živi na društvenoj margini, nasuprot ustaljenom saobraćajnom sistemu u kome su svi motorizovani, čak i zdravi ljudi.”

“Drveće spada u nešto najfinije što znam.Voda i drveće i devojke.Imao sam običaj da se penjem po čitav dan. I često samsamo sedeo mirno, na vrh nekog drveta. Više sati. Kada je krošnja leti bila gusta, niko nije mogao da me vidi. Ja sammogao da vidim sve, ali mene niko nije video.Osećao sam da sam daleko odatle. I kada bih se spustio, bilo je to kao doći kući posle dugog putovanja.I pravio sam ljuljaške. Bio sam super u pravljenju ljuljaški.Popeo bih se visoko i čvrsto vezao konopac za neku granu.Onda bih se ljuljao.I pljuvao. Uvek je bilo tako lepo pljuvati dok sam se ljuljao.Ako sam pio mleko, pljuvačka je bila gusta i dobra.Sa ljuljaške sam dobacivao mlečnu pljuvačku neverovatnodaleko.Ponovo bih hteo da počnem da se ljuljam.Sledeći put kad budem imao para, otići ću u sportsku radnju,kupiću pedeset metara konopca za penjanje, a onda ću naćineko veliko drvo,najbolje uz vodu i napraviću ljuljašku sa moćnom amplitudom i možda ću skočiti sa ljuljaške u vodu.Dok Lise gleda.Radujem se tome.”

“I have the strangest thoughts in my head, maybe I should not write them down.”

“A human being weighing 70 kilograms contains among other things:-45 litres of water-Enough chalk to whiten a chicken pen-Enough phosphorus for 2,200 matches-Enough fat to make approximately 70 bars of soap-Enough iron to make a two inch nail-Enough carbon for 9,000 pencil points-A spoonful of magnesiumI weigh more than 70 kilograms.And I remember a TV series called Cosmos. Carl Sagan would walk around on a set that was meant to look like space, speaking in large numbers. On one of the shows he sat in front of a tank full of all the substances human beings are made of. He stirred the tank with a stick wondering if he would be able to create life.He didn’t succeed.”

“Nå har jeg ham, tenker jeg. Alle vet at det ikke finnes tigere i Afrika. Alle unntatt Børre.”