Franz Kafka

“Before he dies, all his experiences in these long years gather themselves in his head to one point, a ques-tion he has not yet asked the doorkeeper. He waves him nearer, since he can no longer raise his stiffening body. The doorkeeper has to bend low towards him, for the difference in height between them has altered much to the man's disadvantage. "What do you want to know now?" asks the doorkeeper; "you are insati-able." "Everyone strives to reach the Law," says the man, "so how does it happen that for all these many years no one but myself has ever begged for admit-tance?" The doorkeeper recognizes that the man has reached his end, and to let his failing senses catch the words roars in his ear: "No one else could ever be admitted here, since this gate was made only for you. I am now going to shut it.”

“all that matters is that the wound fit the arrow”

“It is as if a person were a prisoner, and he had not only the intention to escape, which would perhaps be attainable, but also, and indeed simultaneously, the intention to rebuild the prison as a pleasure dome for himself. But if he escapes, he cannot rebuild, and if he rebuilds, he cannot escape.”

“Lying in my heap of Earth I can naturally dream of all sorts of things, even of an understanding with the beast, though I know well enough that no such thing can happen, and at the moment when we see each other, more, at that at the instant we merely guess at each other's presence, we shall both blindly bare our claws and teeth, neither of us a second before or after the other, both of us filled with a new and different hunger, even if we should already be gorged to bursting.”

“A false ring of the night bell, once answered — it can never be made right.”

“In her opinion her singing falls on deaf ears anyway; there is no lack of enthusiasm and applause, but she has long since given up hope of genuine understanding as she conceives it.”

“One must lie low, no matter how much it went against the grain, and try to understand that this great organization remained, so to speak, in a state of delicate balance, and that if someone took it upon himself to alter the dispositions of things around him, he ran the risk of losing his footing and falling to destruction, while the organization would simply right itself by some compensating reaction in another part of its machinery – since everything interlocked – and remain unchanged, unless, indeed, which was very probable, it became still more rigid, more vigilant, severer, and more ruthless.”

“This perversion of the truth, familiar to the artist though it was, always unnerved him afresh and proved too much for him. What was a consequence of the premature ending of his fast was here presented as the cause of it! To fight against this lack of understanding, against a whole world of nonunderstanding, was impossible.”

“Jesteśmy opuszczeni jak zbłąkane dzieci w lesie. Stojąc przede mną i na mnie patrząc, co wiesz o bólach, które są we mnie, i cóż ja wiem o Twoich. A gdybym padł przed Tobą, płakał i opowiadał, czegóż więcej dowiedziałbyś się o mnie niż o piekle, gdy ktoś Ci powie, że jest gorące i straszne. Choćby dlatego ludzie powinni stać przed sobą nawzajem z taką czcią, taką zadumą, taką miłością, jak przed bramą piekieł.”

“And yet the fear!”

“It was because of impatience that they were expelled from Paradise; it is because of impatience that they do not return.”

“In the morning and in the evening and at night in his dreams, this street was filled with constantly bustling traffic, which seen from above seemed like a continually self-replenishing mixture of distorted human figures and of the roofs of all sorts of vehicles, constantly scattered by new arrivals, out of which there arose a new, stronger, wilder mixture of noise, dust, and smells, and, catching and penetrating it all, a powerful light that was continually dispersed, carried away, and avidly refracted by the mass of objects that made such a physical impression on one's dazzled eye that it seemed as if a glass pane, hanging over the street and converging everything, were being smashed again and again with the utmost force.”

“You once said that you would like to sit beside me while I write. Listen, in that case I could not write at all. For writing means revealing oneself to excess; that utmost of self-revelation and surrender, in which a human being, when involved with others, would feel he was losing himself, and from which, therefore, he will always shrink as long as he is in his right mind-- for everyone wants to live as long as he is alive-- even the degree of self-revelation and surrender is not enough for writing.Writing that springs from the surface of existence-- when there is no other way and deeper wells have dried up-- is nothing, and collapses the moment a truer emotion makes the surface shake. That is why one can never be alone enough when one writes, why there can never be enough silence around one when one writes, why even night is not night enough.”

“You are at once both the quiet and the confusion of my heart.”

“I cannot make you understand. I cannot make anyone understand what is happening inside me. I cannot even explain it to myself.”

“I have hardly anything in common with myself and should stand very quietly in a corner, content that I can breathe.”

“Hayatın ve ümidin düşmanı bir ortam içinde yazma eylemi kişinin kendi ipini çekmeden önce vasiyetini yazma isteğinden başka bir şey olamıyordu.”

“bazen karşılıklı iki kapısı olan bir odamız varmış gibi geliyor; ikimiz de kendi kapımızın kolunu tutuyoruz, birimiz gözünü kırpsa, diğerimiz kendi kapısının ardına kaçıveriyor ve ilki tek bir söz söylemeye kalksa ikincisi kesinlikle çoktan kapıyı arkasından kilitlemiş ve gözden kaybolmuş oluyor. kapıyı tekrar açacak, çünkü bu belkide insanın terk edemediği bir oda. ilki ikincisine bu kadar benzemese, sakin olsa, ötekine bakmıyormuş gibi davransa, odayı sanki herhangi bir odaymış gibi yavaş yavaş düzene sokacak, ama bunun yerine, o da kapısının orada aynı şeyi yapıyor, hatta bazen ikisi de kapılarının arkasına saklanıyorlar ve güzelim oda bomboş kalıyor.işte bu yüzden, üzücü yanlış anlamalar ortaya çıkıyor...”

“Only that which happens is possible.”

“Which of us would not have been happy under Alexander's radiant gaze? But Diogenes frantically begged him to move out of the way of the sun. That tub was full of ghosts.”

“In a way, I was safe writing”

“What's happened to me,' he thought. It was no dream.”

“I passed by the brothel as though past the house of a beloved.”

“Yetkin, ama acı veren bir büyü ile buradasınız! Benim burada olduğum gibi, daha da elle tutulur biçimde; ben neredeysem siz de oradasınız, benim olduğum kadar, daha da belirli.”

“I'm a cage, in search of a bird.”

“My doubts stand in a circle around every word, I see them before I see the word, but what then! I do not see the word at all, I invent it.”

“Wenn man einmal das Böse bei sich aufgenommen hat, verlangt es nicht mehr, daß man ihm glaube.”

“Das Negative zu tun, ist uns noch auferlegt, das Positive ist uns schon gegeben.”

“Es gibt zwei menschliche Hauptsünden, aus welchen sich alle andern ableiten: Ungeduld und Lässigkeit. Wegen der Ungeduld sind sie aus dem Paradiese vertrieben worden, wegen der Lässigkeit kehren sie nicht zurück. Vielleicht aber gibt es nur eine Hauptsünde: die Ungeduld. Wegen der Ungeduld sind sie vertrieben worden, wegen der Ungeduld kehren sie nicht zurück.”

“Alle menschlichen Fehler sind Ungeduld, ein vorzeitiges Abbrechen des Methodischen, ein scheinbares Einpfählen der scheinbaren Sache.”

“In a light that is fierce and strong one can see the world dissolve. To weak eyes it becomes solid, to weaker eyes it shows fists; before weaker eyes still it feels ashamed, and smites down whomsoever dares to look at it.”

“August 2, 1914: Germany has declared war on Russia. Went swimming in the afternoon.”

“The books were oldand well worn, the cover of one of them had nearly broken through in itsmiddle, and it was held together with a few threads. "Everything is sodirty here," said K., shaking his head, and before he could pick thebooks up the woman wiped some of the dust off with her apron. K. tookhold of the book that lay on top and threw it open, an indecent pictureappeared. A man and a woman sat naked on a sofa, the base intent ofwhoever drew it was easy to see but he had been so grossly lacking inskill that all that anyone could really make out were the man and thewoman who dominated the picture with their bodies, sitting in overlyupright postures that created a false perspective and made it difficultfor them to approach each other. K. didn't thumb through that book anymore, but just threw open the next one at its title page, it was a novelwith the title, What Grete Suffered from her Husband, Hans. "So this isthe sort of law book they study here," said K., "this is the sort ofperson sitting in judgement over me.”

“If I didn't have my parents to think about I'd have given in my notice a long time ago, I'd have gone up to the boss and told him just what I think, tell him everything I would, let him know just what I feel. He'd fall right off his desk! And it's a funny sort of business to be sitting up there at your desk, talking down at your subordinates from up there, especially when you have to go right up close because the boss is hard of hearing.”

“There is a story, for instance, that has very much the ring of truth about it. It goes like this: One of the older officials, a good and peaceful man, was dealing with a difficult matter for the court which had become very confused, especially thanks to the contributions from the lawyers. He had been studying it for a day and a night without a break — as these officials are indeed hard working, no-one works as hard as they do. When it was nearly morning, and he had been working for twenty-four hours with probably very little result, he went to the front entrance, waited there in ambush, and every time a lawyer tried to enter the building he would throw him down the steps. The lawyers gathered together down in front of the steps and discussed with each other what they should do; on the one hand they had actually no right to be allowed into the building so that there was hardly anything that they could legally do to the official and, as I've already mentioned, they would have to be careful not to set all the officials against them. On the other hand, any day not spent in court is a day lost for them and it was a matter of some importance to force their way inside. In the end, they agreed that they would try to tire the old man out. One lawyer after another was sent out to run up the steps and let himself be thrown down again, offering what resistance he could as long as it was passive resistance, and his colleagues would catch him at the bottom of the steps. That went on for about an hour until the old gentleman, who was already exhausted from working all night, was very tired and went back to his office.”

“I had to arrange things as well as I could. That's obviously a very bad place for the bed, in front of the door. For instance when the judge I'm painting at present comes he always comes through the door by the bed, and I've even given him a key to this door so that he can wait for me here in the studio when I'm not home. Although nowadays he usually comes early in the morning when I'm still asleep. And of course, it always wakes me up when I hear the door opened beside the bed, however fast asleep I am. If you could hear the way I curse him as he climbs over my bed in the morning you'd lose all respect for judges. I suppose I could take the key away from him but that'd only make things worse. It only takes a tiny effort to break any of the doors here off their hinges.”

“Und er stand vollkommen frei und warf die Beine. Er strahlte vor Einsicht.”

“Oto masz, drogi Maksie, dwie książki i kamyk. Zawsze starałem się znaleźć na Twoje urodziny coś, co wskutek swej obojętności nie zmieniałoby się, nie gubiło, nie psuło i nie mogło być zapomniane. A dumając potem miesiącami, znów nie widziałem innego ratunku, niż wysłać Ci książkę. Z książkami jest jednak utrapienie, z jednej strony są obojętne, a potem znów z drugiej o tyle bardziej interesujące, potem zaś pociągnęło mnie do tych obojętnych tylko przekonanie, które bynajmniej nic we mnie nie rozstrzygnęło, w końcu zaś, ciągle jeszcze z odmiennym przekonaniem, trzymałem w ręku książkę, która paliła tak tylko z ciekawości. Kiedyś nawet z rozmysłem zapomniałem o Twoich urodzinach, co było wszak lepsze niż posłanie książki, ale dobre nie było. Dlatego wysyłam Ci teraz ten kamyczek i będę Ci go wysyłał póki naszego życia. Będziesz go trzymać w kieszeni, ochroni Cię, wsadzisz do szuflady, również nie będzie bezczynny, ale jeśli go wyrzucisz, będzie najlepiej. Bo wiesz, Maksie, moja miłość do Ciebie jest większa niż ja sam i bardziej ja w niej mieszkam niż ona we mnie, i ma też kiepską podporę w mojej niepewnej istocie, tym sposobem jednak dostanie w kamyczku skalne mieszkanie i niechby to było tylko w szczelinie bruku na Schalengasse. Od dawna już ratowała mnie ona częściej niż sądzisz, a właśnie teraz, gdy wiem o sobie mniej niż kiedykolwiek i odczuwam siebie z pełną świadomością jedynie w półśnie, tylko tak nadzwyczaj lekko, tylko teraz jeszcze - krążę tak niczym z czarnymi wnętrznościami - dobrze zatem zrobi ciśnięcie w świat takiego kamyka i oddzielenie w ten sposób pewnego od niepewnego. Czym są wobec tego książki! Książka zaczyna Cię nudzić i już nie przestanie albo porwie ją twoje dziecko, albo, jak ta książka Walsera, rozlatuje się już, kiedy ją dostajesz. Przy kamyku przeciwnie, nic nie może Cię znudzić, taki kamyk nie może też ulec zniszczeniu, a jeśli już, to dopiero po długim czasie, także zapomnieć go nie można, ponieważ nie masz obowiązku o nim pamiętać, w końcu nie możesz go też nigdy ostatecznie zgubić, gdyż na pierwszej lepszej żwirowej drodze znajdziesz go z powrotem, bo jest to właśnie pierwszy lepszy kamyk. A jeszcze nie mógłbym mu zaszkodzić większą pochwałą, szkody z pochwał powstają bowiem tylko wtedy, gdy pochwała chwaloną rzecz rozgniata, niszczy lub zapodziewa. Ale kamyczek? Krótko mówiąc, wyszukałem Ci najpiękniejszy prezent urodzinowy i przekazuję Ci go z pocałunkiem, który ma wyrażać niezdarne podziękowanie za to, ze jesteś.”

“The man in ecstasy and the man drowning—both throw up their arms.”

“I lack nothing. I only needed myself.”

“I hate everything that does not relate to literature, conversations bore me (even when they relate to literature), to visit people bores me, the joys and sorrows of my relatives bore me to my soul. Conversation takes the importance, the seriousness, the truth, out of everything I think.”

“I was making for that city in the south of which it was said in our village:"There you'll find queer folk! Just think, they never sleep!""And why not?""Because they never get tired.""And why not?""Because they're fools.""Don't fools get tired?""How could fools get tired!"---Children on a Country Road, Contemplation.”

“Unutamayacağım bir doğa olayıydı yüzün istasyonda Milena: bulutlardan değil, kendiliğinden gölgelenen bir güneştin sanki.”

“Bu elle tutulamayan, bu korkunç sorumluluk durumunu bütün acılarıyla yüklenen biri olacağım yerde, sözgelişi odandaki, o her zaman seni görebilen mutlu dolap olsam, ne iyi olurdu: seyrederdim seni, koltukta oturuşunu, mektup yazışını, yatışını ya da uykuya dalışını.”

“Hold fast! then you too will see the unchangeable dark distance, out of which nothing can come except one day the chariot; it rolls up, gets bigger and bigger, fills the whole world at the moment it reaches you - and you sink into it like a child sinking into the upholstery of a carriage that drives through the storm and night.”

“He has two antagonists: the first presses him from behind, from the origin. The second blocks the road ahead. He gives battle to both. To be sure, the first supports him in his fight with the second, for he wants to push him forward, and in the same way the second supports him in his fight with the first, since he drives him back. But it is only theoretically so. For it is not only the two antagonists who are there, but he himself as well, and who really knows his intentions? His dream, though, is that some time in an unguarded moment and this would require a night darker than any night has ever been yet he will jump out of the fighting line and be promoted, on account of his experience in fighting, to the position of umpire over his antagonists in their fight with each other.”

“One morning, as Gregor Samsa was waking up from anxious dreams, he discovered that in his bed he had been changed into a monstrous bug…”

“Kısaca şunu söylemek istiyorum Milena: etrafındakilerin o ulaşılmaz zekilikleri ile hayvanca sersemliklerine karşı senin haklı olduğuna inanmamış olsaydım bu kadar ilgilenebilir miydim seninle? koskoca okyanusların dibindeki bir avuç toprak o baskıya nasıl dayanıyorsa sen de öyle dayanmalısın Milena. Bugüne kadar insanlara tahammül edebileceğimi yeryüzü ile başa çıkabileceğimi düşünmezdim hiç. Ama sen şunu öğrettin bana dayanılmaz olan aslında yaşam değilmiş, insanlarmış.”

“Beni engelleyenin olgular olduğu pek söylenemez, bir korku, aşılabilmesi olanaksız bir korku var: mutlu olmaktan korkmak, daha yüce bir amaç için kendine acı verme tutkusu ve buyruğu.”

“And so gentlemen, I learned. Oh, if you have to learn, you learn; if you’re desperate for a way out, you learn; you learn pitilessly. You stand over yourself with a whip in your hand; if there’s the least resistance, you lash yourself.”