Gayle Forman

“Sentí que el calor iba subiéndome por el cuello y que me ruborizaba. Clavé la vista en mis zapatos. Sabía que Adam me estaba mirando, y también que si alzaba los ojos me besaría. Y me sorprendió lo mucho que deseaba ese beso, darme cuenta de que lo había pensado tan a menudo que incluso había memorizado la forma exacta de sus labios, e imaginado que le acariciaba el hoyuelo de la mejilla con el dedo.Levanté los ojos, parpadeando. Adam estaba esperando. Así fue como todo empezó.”

“...no way through it but through it," I tell myself.”

“Algunos amores son imperecederos. Sobre todo si ocurren en París.”

“Me doy cuenta que no es solo a Willem a quien estoy buscando; también es a Lulu”

“(...) quiero estar por encima de esto. Quiero que todos esos recuerdos desaparezcan o sean suplantados por algo más, que dejen de perseguirme.”

“Dear Willem:I’ve been trying to forget about you and our day in Paris for nine months now, but as you can see, it’s not going all that well. I guess more than anything, I want to know, did you just leave? If you did, it’s okay. I mean it’s not, but if I can know the truth, I can get over it. And if you didn’t leave, I don’t know what to say. Except I’m sorry that I did.I don’t know what your response will be at getting this letter, like a ghost from your past. But no matter what happened, I hope you’re okay.”

“I realize it’s not just Willem I’m looking for; it’s Lulu too.”

“No one is who they pretend to be”

“I don't know who I am. Or maybe I do know who I am and I just don't want to be her anymore.”

“. . . I understand that this is the point of laughter, to spread happiness.”

“There is a world of difference, Lulu, between falling in love and being in love.”

“. . . it already seems pretty obvious that the world is divided into two groups: the doers and the watchers. The people things happen to and the rest of us, who just sort of plod on with things.”

“Sometimes you can only feel something by its absence. By the empty spaces it leaves behind.”

“Y es allí cuando entiendo que he sido manchada. Ya sea porque todavía estoy enamorada de él, ya sea porque el alguna vez estuvo enamorado de mí, y no importa de quien esté enamorado ahora, Willen cambió mi vida.Me enseñó cómo perderme, y yo me mostré como encontrarme.”

“It's nice, this. The canal." He looks at me. "You.""I'll bet you say that to all the canals.”

“A veces, sólo se puede sentir algo por su ausencia. Por el espacio vacío que deja atrás.”

“About being grateful for what you have instead of yearning for what you think you want.”

“I'm the one shot, the heir and the spare, so you have to make damn sure your one investment pays off because there's no backup.”

“Then the musical instruments appeared. Dad’s snare drum from the house, Henry’s guitar from his car, Adam’s spare guitar from my room. Everyone was jamming together, singing songs: Dad’s songs, Adam’s songs, old Clash songs, old Wipers songs. Teddy was dancing around, the blond of his hair reflecting the golden flames. I remember watching it all and getting that tickling in my chest and thinking to myself: This is what happiness feels like.”

“Es sólo un día, un periodo de veinticuatro horas para superarte a ti mismo -Adam”

“The people we pretend at, they're already in us. That's why we pretend them in the first place.”

“You stood over me and you made a promise to me, as sacred as any vow. And I can understand why you're angry, but you can't blame me. You can't hate me for taking your word.”

“I force my eyes upward and look at Mia for the first time. She's still beautiful. Not in an obvious Vanessa LeGrande or Bryn Shraeder kind of way. In a quiet way that's always been devastating to me. Her hair, long and dark, is down now, swimming damply against her bare shoulders, which are still milky white and covered with the constellation of freckles that I used to kiss. The scar on her left shoulder, the one that used to be an angry red weld is silvery pink now. Almost like the latest rage in tattoo accessories. Almost pretty.”

“But seventeen is an inconvenient time to fall in love.”

“He was right, after all; it didn't leave a scar, though part of me wishes it had. At least I'd have some evidence, some justification of this permanence. Stains are even worse when you're the only one who can see them.”

“Mia's smile is melting chocolate. It's a kick-ass guitar solo. It's everything good in this world.”

“The politeness was painful. I wanted to push through it, to return to the glow of the night of the concert, but I was unsure of how to get back there.”

“I'm also starting to wonder something else. If maybe the point of this crazy quest I'm on wasn't to help me find Willem. Maybe it was to help me find someone else entirely.”

“Everyone takes a turn, and when it gets to me, I shout out what Jewish people say at times like this: "L'chaim!" "It means 'to life,'" I explain. And as I say it, I think that maybe this is what I was saying a prayer for back in the cathedral. To life.”

“I think you're the sort of person who finds money on the ground and waves it in the air and asks if anyone has lost it. I think you cry in movies that aren't even sad because you have a soft heart, though you don't let it show. I think you do things that scare you, and that makes you braver than those adrenaline junkies who bungee-jump off bridges.”

“I do have a point to all this,” she continues. “There are like twenty people in that waiting room right now. Some of them are related to you. Some of them are not. But we’re all your family.” She stops now. Leans over me so that the wisps of her hair tickle my face. She kisses me on the forehead. “You still have a family,” she whispers.”

“And this is the truth. Because I may be only eighteen, but it already seems pretty obvious that the world is divided into two groups: the doers and the watchers. The people things happen to and the rest of us, who just sort of plod on with things. The Lulus and the Allysons. It never occurred to me that by pretending to be Lulu, I might slip into that other column, even for just a day.”

“The clothes are packed off to GoodwillI said my good-byes up on the hillThe house is empty, the furniture soldSoon your smell will decay to moldDon't know why I bother calling, ain't nobody answeringDon't know why I bother singing, ain't nobody listening"Disconnect"Collateral Damage, Track 10”

“Really? Was that how you quit me?”

“She said if she couldn't play, she had nothing left. What about me?”

“She left for Juilliard the day after Labor Day. I drove her to the airport. She kissed me good-bye. She told me that she loved me more than life itself. Then she stepped through security.She never came back.”

“I've never toughened up enough to handle what I'd have to handle if I were to stay.”

“ve never toughened up enough to handle what I'd have to handle if I were to stay.”

“Shouldn't I stay? Soldier through it? Maybe if I'd had some practice, maybe if I'd had more devastation in my life, I would be more prepared to go on. It's not that my life has been perfect. I've had disappointments and I've been lonely and frustrated and angry and all the crappy stuff everyone feels.”

“Willem holds my wrist for a long moment, looking at that birthmark. Then he lifts it to his mouth. And though his lips are soft and his kiss is gentle, it feels like a knife jamming into the electrical socket. It feels like the moment when I go live”

“Sin dinero. Sin lugar para quedarse. Debe ser mi peor pesadilla. Pero no me importa. Es gracioso pensar en las cosas que crees temer, hasta que te suceden y luego ya no es así.”

“Creo que eres el tipo de persona que encuentra dinero en el suelo y lo mueve en el aire y pregunta si alguien lo ha perdido. Creo que lloras en películas que ni siquiera son tristes porque tienes un corazón tierno, aunque no lo muestras. Creo que haces cosas que te asustan, y eso te hace más valiente que esos adictos a la adrenalina que hacen saltos en bungee desde los puentes.”

“Él mira una de las fotos por largo tiempo. Entonces me mira.—Te guardaré aquí. —Se golpea la sien—. A donde no puedas perderte.”

“Travelling's not something you're good at. It's something you do. Like breathing. You can't work too much at it, or it feels like work. You have to surrender yourself to the chaos. To the accidents.”

“Travelling is like a talent, like whistling or dancing. And some people have it.”

“— Esto es enamorarse. — Con su dedo, zaca un poco de Nutella del interior de su crêpe y pone una cucharada en la parte interior de mi muñeca. Está caliente y limoso y comienza a derretirse contra mi piel pegajosa, pero antes de que tenga la oportunidad de deslizarse lejos, Willem lame su pulgar y limpia la mancha de Nutella y lo lleva a su boca. Todo sucede rápido, como un lagarto liquidando una mosca.— Esto es amar. — Y aquí me quita la otra muñeca, la que tiene el reloj en ella, y se mueve alrededor de la correa hasta que ve lo que está buscando. Una vez más, se lame el dedo. Sólo que esta vez, él lo frota contra mi marca de nacimiento, con fuerza, como si estuviera tratando de fregar.— ¿Amar es una marca de nacimiento? — Bromeo mientras retracto mi brazo. Pero mi voz tiene un temblor en ella, y el lugar donde su huella húmeda se seca sobre mi piel arde de alguna manera.— Es algo que nunca sale, no importa cuánto pueda ser que desees que lo haga.”

“Hay que enamorarse para amar, pero enamorarse no es lo mismo que amar”

“Creo que todo está pasando todo el tiempo, pero si no te pones en el camino, lo pierdes. Cuando viajas, te pones allí. No siempre es genial. A veces es terrible. Pero otras… —Levanta los hombros y hace un gesto hacia París, luego me mira de reojo—, no es tan malo.”

“Porque puedo tener sólo dieciocho años, pero ya parece bastante obvio que el mundo se divide en dos grupos: los que actúan y los que observan. La gente a la que le suceden las cosas y el resto de nosotros, que sólo medio perseveran con las cosas. Las Lulu y las Allyson.”

“¿Entonces, Lulu? ¿Qué dices? ¿Quieres ir a París por un día? ¿Sólo por un día?Es totalmente una locura. Ni siquiera lo conozco. Y podría ser atrapada. ¿Y qué tanto de París puedes conocer en un día? Y todo esto podría resultar desastrosamente mal en muchas formas. Todo eso es cierto. Lo sé. Pero no cambia el hecho de que quiera ir.Así que esta vez, en vez de decir no, intento algo diferente.Y digo, sí.”