George Lopez

“if you make waffles, throw out the first one.”

“Memories, priceless. Well not really priceless, but there you go!”

“No Angie, it's instant. Like when someone trips in the cafeteria and you're laughing so hard milk comes out of your nose, the guy next to you is laughing so hard he accidentally farts. BOOM! Friends for life!”

“Eh, Whappaaaa!”

“We are now the proud owners of a white boy. Now we have to shop in the caucasian isle and get sunscreen, mayonaise and mild salsa because the other ones really hawt!”

“Two wrongs do not make a right; but three rights make a left.”