J.D. Salinger

“Espero que cuando me muera alguien tenga sentido común suficiente como para tirarme al río o algo así. Cualquier cosa menos meterme en un maldito cementerio. Eso de que venga la gente los domingos a ponerte ramos de flores en el estómago y todo ese rollo. ¿Quién quiere flores cuando ya se ha muerto? Nadie.”

“I am a dash man and not a miler, and it is probable that I will never write a novel. So far the novels of this war have had too much of the strength, maturity and craftsmanship critics are looking for, and too little of the glorious imperfections which teeter and fall off the best minds. The men who have been in this war deserve some sort of trembling melody rendered without embarrassment or regret. I’ll watch for that book.”

“Ciertas cosas deberían seguir siendo como son. Deberías poder meterlas en una de esas vitrinas de cristal y dejarlas en paz. Sé que es imposible, pero de todos modos es una pena".”

“But my point, Mattie—if I have a point, Mattie—is this: kind of try to live up to the best that’s in you. If you give your word to people, let them know that they’re getting the word of the best. If you room with some dopey girl at college, try to make her less dopey. If you’re standing outside a theater and some old gal comes up selling gum, give her a buck if you’ve got a buck — but only if you can do it without patronizing her. That’s the trick, baby.' -Last Day of the Last Furlough”

“But what I don’t like — and what I don’t think either Seymour or Buddy would like, either, as a matter of fact — is the way you talk about all these people. I mean you don’t just despise what they represent — you despise them. It’s too damn personal, Franny. I mean it. You get a real little homicidal glint in your eye when you talk about this Tupper, for instance. All this business about his going into the men’s room to muss his hair before he comes in to class. All that. He probably does — it goes with everything else you’ve told me about him. I’m not saying it doesn’t. But it’s none of your business, buddy, what he does with his hair. It would be all right, in a way, if you thought his personal affectations were sort of funny. Or if you felt a tiny bit sorry for him for being insecure enough to give himself a little pathetic goddam glamour. But when you tell me about it — and I’m not fooling, now — you tell me about it as though his hair was a goddamn personal enemy of yours. That is not right — and you know it. If you’re going to to war against the System, just do your shooting like a nice, intelligent girl — because the enemy’s there, and not because you don’t like his hairdo or his goddam necktie.”

“In my opinion, if you really want to know, half of the nastiness in the world is stirred up by people who aren't using their true egos.”

“It's really hard to be roomates with people if your suitcases are much better than theirs--if yours are the really good ones and theirs aren't. You think if they're intelligent and all, the other person, and have a good sense of humor, that they don't give a damn whose suitcases are better, but they do. They really do.”

“Don't hate me because I can't remember some person immediately. Especially when they look like everybody else, and talk and dress and act like everybody else.”

“Azt kérdezik, igyekszem-e beilleszkedni az ottani rendbe, ha jövő szeptemberben visszamegyek az iskolába. Ez olyan hülye kérdés, szerintem. Mert honnan tudná az ember, mit fog csinálni, amíg meg nem csinálta? A válasz: sehonnan. Én azt hiszem, igyekszem majd, de honnan tudjam? Esküszöm, hülye kérdés.”

“Többek között rájössz majd, hogy nem te vagy az első, akit megzavar, megrémít és undorral tölt el az emberek viselkedése. Semmi esetre sem vagy egyedül a listán, ez izgalmas és serkentő felismerés lesz. Nagyon, nagyon sok ember volt már ilyen erkölcsi és lelki válságban, mint te most. Szerencsére volt köztük, aki feljegyezte az akkori problémáit. Tanulsz majd belőlük, ha akarsz. Mint ahogy egyszer, ha valamit már felmutattál életedben, valaki más tanul majd tőled.”

“But fishing, as we know, in libraries or anywhere else, is a tricky business, with never a certainty of who's going to catch whom.”

“A legjobb abban a múzeumban mégis az, hogy minden mindig ott marad a helyén, ahol van. Semmi nem mozdul. Százezerszer is odamehetsz, és az eszkimó mindig éppen akkor fogja ki a két halat, a madarak még mindig délre repülnek, a szarvasok isznak a tócsából, a szép kis agancsukkal és a sovány lábukkal, és az indián nő, meztelen mellével, még mindig ugyanazt a takarót szövi. Semmi nem változik; ami változik: az ember saját maga. Nem az, hogy idősebb lesz, vagy ilyesmi. Nem éppen azért. Csak éppen megvál­tozik. Mondjuk, most kabátban megy. Vagy az, aki legutóbb a párja volt, skarlátot kapott, és most más a párja. Vagy a Miss Aigletinger helyettese viszi az osztályt. Vagy az ember hallotta, hogy a szülei reggel állati nagy parádét rendeztek a fürdőszobában. Vagy az ember csak elment az utcán egy pocsolya mellett, amin szivárványszínű benzinfoltok úsznak. Úgy értem, az ember kicsit mindig más, nem tudom ezt pontosan megmagyarázni. És még ha tudnám is, nem biztos, hogy akarnám.”

“Mary Jane. Listen. Please," Eloise said, sobbing. "You remember our freshman year, and I had that brown-and-yellow dress I bought in Boise, and Miriam Ball told me nobody wore those kind of dresses in New York, and I cried all night?" Eloise shook Mary Jane's arm. "I was a nice girl," she pleaded, "wasn't I?”

“I told her I loved her and all. It was a lie, of course, but the thing is, I meant it when I said it. I'm crazy. I swear to God I am.”

“I mean you'd be different in some way- I can't explain what I mean. And even if I could, I'm not sure I'd feel like it.”

“One thing? One thing I like? Okay.”

“He said he ate his food out of our big refrigerators, drove our eight-cylinder American cars, un-hesitatingly used our medicines when he was sick, and relied on the U.S. Army to protect his parents and sisters from Hitler's Germany, and nothing, not one single thing in all his poems, reflected these realities.”

“Bacak bacak üzerine atmış kızlar, bacak bacak üzerine atmamış kızlar, felaket bacaklı kızlar, rezalet bacaklı kızlar, harika görünen kızlar, bir tanısanız ne orospu olduğunu bileceğiniz kızlar.”

“They're quite touchy about anything like that, especially my father. They're nice and all-I'm not saying that-but they're also touchy as hell.”

“When they argue, there can be no danger of a permanent rift, because they're Mother and Daughter. A terrible and beautiful phenomenon to watch.”

“But most of all, above everything else, who in the Bible besides Jesus knew - knew - that we're carrying the Kingdom of Heaven around with us, inside, where we're all too goddam stupid and sentimental and unimaginative to look?”

“That was the worst. What happened was, I got the idea in my head - and I could not get it out - that college was just one more dopey, inane place in the world dedicated to piling up treasure on earth and everything. I mean treasure is treasure, for heaven's sake. What's the difference whether the treasure is money, or property, or even culture, or even just plain knowledge? It all seemed like exactly the same thing to me, if you take off the wrapping - and it still does! Sometimes I think that knowledge - when it's knowledge for knowledge's sake, anyway - is the worst of all. The least excusable, certainly...I don't think it would have all got me quite so down if just once in a while - just once in a while - there was at least some polite little perfunctory implication that knowledge should lead to wisdom, and that if it doesn't, it's just a disgusting waste of time!”

“It was just terrible! And the worst part was, I knew what a bore I was being, I knew how I was depressing people, or even hurting their feelings- but I just couldn't stop! I just could not stop picking!”

“I go because I sit in judgment on every poor, ulcerous bastard I know. Which in itself doesn't bother me too much. At least, I judge straight from the colon when I judge, and I know that I'll pay like hell for any judgment I mete out, sooner or later, one way or another.”

“Bessie: 'Why don't you get married?'Zooey: 'I like riding in trains too much. You never get to sit next to the window anymore when you're married.”

“I love you I love you I love you. Do you actually know I've only danced with you twice in eleven months?”

“(...) o parvalhão reparou nela e aproximou-se para a cumprimentar. Haviam de ouvir a maneira como se cumprimentaram. Haviam de pensar que não se viam há vinte anos. Haviam de pensar que tomavam banho na mesma banheira ou coisa assim quando eram pequenos. Amigos do coração. Era de vómitos. O mais engraçado era que provavelmente se tinham encontrado uma única vez, numa festa pirosa qualquer. Finalmente, quando deram por terminadas as lambuzadelas, a amiga Sally apresentou-nos. Chamava-se George qualquer coisa - já nem sequer me lembro - e andava em Andover. Só mesmo visto. Haviam de o ver quando a amiga Sally lhe perguntou o que achava da peça. Era o tipo de armante que tem de se dar espaço para responder a qualquer pergunta que lhe façam.”

“- (...) Só falou nisso de a Vida ser um jogo e assim. Sabe como é.- A Vida é um jogo, meu rapaz. A Vida é um jogo que se joga seguindo as regras.- Pois é, senhor professor. Eu sei que é. Eu sei.Um jogo, uma ova. Raio de jogo. Se calhamos do lado onde estão todos os craques, está bem que é um jogo... Concordo que é. Mas se calhamos do outro lado, onde não há craques nenhuns, então onde é que está o jogo? Nada. Jogo coisa nenhuma.”

“TINA: Oh, Rick, Rick, I’m scared. What’s happened to us? I can’t seem to find us any more. I reach out and reach out and we’re just not there. I’m frightened. I’m a frightened child (Looks out the window) I hate this rain. Sometimes I see me dead in it.RICK (quietly): My darling, isn’t that a line from ‘A Farewell To Arms’?TINA (turns, furious): Get out of here. Get out! Get out of here before I jump out of this window.Zooey took a parting look at the page he had been reading, then closed the manuscript and dropped it over the side of the tub. ‘Jesus Christ almighty,’ he said. ‘Sometimes I see me dead in the rain.”

“I knew it wasn't too important, but it made me sad anyway.”

“Zooey was in dreamy top form. The announcer had them off on the subject of housing developments, and the little Burke girl said she hated houses that all look alike-meaning a long row of identical 'development' houses. Zooey said they were 'nice.' He said it would be very nice to come home and be in the wrong house. To eat dinner with the wrong people by mistake, sleep in the wrong bed by mistake, and kiss everybody goodbye in the morning thinking they were your own family. He said he even wished everybody in the world looked exactly alike. He said you'd keep thinking everybody you met was your wife or your mother or father, and people would always be throwing their arms around each other wherever they went, and it would look 'very nice.”

“I'm not too sure what the name of the song was that he was playing when I came in, but whatever it was, he was really stinking it up. He was putting all these dumb, show-offy ripples in the high notes, and a lot of other very tricky stuff that gives me a pain in the ass. You should've heard the crowd, though, when he was finished... They went mad... I swear to God, if I were a piano player or an actor or something and all those dopes thought I was terrific, I'd hate it. I wouldn't even want them to clap for me.”

“The bellboy that showed me to the room was this very old guy around sixty-five. He was even more depressing than the room was. He was one of those bald guys that comb all their hair over from the side to cover up the baldness. I'd rather be bald than do that. Anyway, what a gorgeous job for a guy around sixty-five years old. Carrying people's suitcases and waiting for a tip.”

“I could see my mother going in Spaulding's and asking the salesman a million dopy questions - and here I was getting the ax again. It mad me feel pretty sad. She bought me the wrong kind of skates - I wanted racing skates and she bought me hockey - but it made me sad anyway. Almost every time somebody gives me a present, it ends up making me sad.”

“Naturally, I never told him I thought he was a terrific whistler. I mean you don’t just go up to somebody and say, ‘You’re a terrific whistler.”

“The world is full of actors pretending to be human”

“This is too grand to be said (so I’m just the man to say it), but I can’t be my brother’s brother for nothing, and I know – not always, but I know – there is no single thing I do that is more important than going into that awful Room 307. There isn’t one girl in there, including the Terrible Miss Zabel, who is not as much my sister as Boo Boo or Franny. They may shine with the misinformation of the ages, but they shine. This thought manages to stun me: There’s no place I’d really rather got right now than into Room 307. Seymour once said that all we do our whole lives is go from one little piece of Holy Ground to the next. Is he never wrong?Just go to bed, now. Quickly. Quickly and slowly.”

“Oh how nice!" the lady said. But not corny. She was just nice & all. "I must tell Ernest we met," she said. "May I ask your name, dear?" "Rudolf Schmidt," I told her. I didn't feel like giving her my whole life history. Rudolf Schmidt was the name of the janitor of our dorm.”

“In certain Zen monasteries, it's a cardinal rule, if not the only serious enforced discipline, that when one monk calls out 'Hi!' to another monk, the latter must call back 'Hi!' without thinking.”

“It's full of phonies and all you do is study so that you can learn enough to be smart enough to be able to buy a golden Cadillac...”

“Duyguluymuş. Bittim. Bu Morrow denen herif ancak bir klozet kapağı kadar duygulu olabilirdi.”

“All the kids kept trying to grab for the gold ring, and so was old Phoebe, and I was sort of afraid she'd fall off the goddam horse, but I didn't say anything or do anything. The thing with kids is, if they want to grab for the gold ring, you have to let them do it, and not say anything. If they fall off, they fall off, but it's bad if you say anything to them.When the ride was over she got off her horse and came over to me. "You ride once, too, this time," she said."No, I'll just watch ya. I think I'll just watch," I said.”

“Then all of a sudden, this tear plopped down on the checkerboard. On one of the red squares – boy, I can still see it. She just rubbed it into the board with her finger. I don't know why, but it bothered hell out of me. So what I did was, I went over and made her move over on the glider so that I could sit down next to her – I practically sat down in her lap, as a matter of fact. Then she really started to cry, and the next thing I knew, I was kissing her all over – anywhere – her eyes, her nose, her forehead, her eyebrows and all, her ears – her whole face except her mouth and all. She sort of wouldn't let me get to her mouth.”

“We're freaks, the two of us, Franny and I. I'm a twenty-five-year-old freak and she's a twenty-one-year-old freak, and both those bastards are responsible. I swear to you, I could murder them both without batting an eyelash. The great teachers. The great emancipators. My God. I can't even sit down to lunch with a man any more and hold up my end of a decent conversation. I either get so bored or so goddamn preachy that if the son of a bitch had any sense, he'd break his chair over my head”

“I know. I'm very hard to talk to. I realize that.”

“While he was doing it, I went over to my window and opened it and packed a snowball with my bare hands. The snow was very good for packing. I didn’t throw it at anything, though. I started to throw it. At a car that was parked across the street. But I changed my mind. The car looked so nice and white. Then I started to throw it at a hydrant, but that looked too nice and white, too. Finally I didn’t throw it at anything. All I did was close the window and walk around the room with the snowball, packing it harder. A little while later, I still had it with me when I and Brossard and Ackley got on the bus. The bus driver opened the doors and made me throw it out. I wasn’t going to chuck it at anybody, but he wouldn’t believe me. People never believe you.”

“Some game. If you get on the side where all the hot-shots are, then it’s a game all right – I’ll admit that. But if you get on the other side, where there aren’t any hot-shots, then what’s a game about it?”

“I don’t care if it’s a sad good-by or a bad good-by, but when I leave a place I like to know I’m leaving it. If you don’t, you feel even worse.”

“But you don't have to be a bad guy to depress somebody - you can be a good guy and do it.”

“But you're wrong about that hating business. I mean about hating football players and all. You really are. I don't hate too many guys. What I may do, I may hate them for a little while, like this guy Stradlater I knew at Pencey or this other boy, Robert Ackley. I hated them once in a while- I admit it- but it doesn't last too long, is what I mean. After a while, if I didn't see them, if they didn't come in the room, or if I din't see them in the dining room for a couple of meals, I sort of missed them. I mean I sort of missed them.”