Jessica Thompson

“Heartbroken men are like wild animals, running around with hysteria in their eyes, desperately trying to knock the dents out of their egos. ”

“She looked different. Oh yes, that was it - I didn't love her anymore. People do look different when you fall out of love with them.”

“This connection had the potential to be too special to ruin it with the hurt of misfired romantic intentions. And while half of me wanted to tear his shirt off with my teeth, I also wanted him to be in my life for the duration. I didn't want him to be the one I avoided because he'd hurt me. If I was just his friend, then I would still be blessed. If it meant swallowing my pride and being his shoulder when he got hurt, or being the one he ranted at when he was angry, I was prepared to do it with dignity.”

“I never wanted to be the one to break her heart, to disappoint her, to be late for dinner or to hog the bed. I never wanted to be the person to make her cry, or turn out to be a huge let-down. She meant to much to me for any of that. While I believed I could love her better than anyone in the world, I didn't really trust myself to be... Well, good enough.”

“I like to pick things apart, analyse them and put them back in a better order than they had been in before”

“I needed to learn how to redesign the route to my heart so someone else stood a chance in hell of navigating it.”

“I'll be honest with you here... I'd describe it as a wild, almost uncontrollable need to be a part of that person's life. A passion, really. Yes - in fact, the best way of describing it is if you lost everything - your job, your home, your car - but that person was still by your side, none of it would really matter.”

“That was the awakening, really; it dawned on me that this wasn't really very fair on anyone. On her. On me. On Sienna. But I wasn't willing to change anything, either. I was fiercely protective of my friendship with Sienna. I had fought for it, against my true feelings, for years. I had battled so hard to suppress my feelings, and succeeded. I could never let her go.”

“One thing concerns me a little, nick has a girlfriend, right? Well, how do you think she'll  feel about all of this? He probed. He had this look on his face that he always had when I'm doing something a little bit naughty. You know, something you can get away with, but it's still a bit dodgy.”

“It must be difficult loving someone that much and having to pack it away into a little box and pretend it isn't there'That was a very good way of describing it. A little box. Packed full of love. Love that I had never really been able to express, so it was banging away at the sides and screaming to be let out. 'Yes it has been. And really, it's a little box I carry everywhere with me, because I guess the love never properly goes away.”

“What am I going to do?I wish I knew the answer, Sienna. The man your going to marry is walking this earth. He's alive right now, somewhere. He could be in Australia, backpacking with friends; he could be working in a bar in China; he could be a hotshot American lawyer; he could be a musician; he could be going about his life in London at this very moment... Any day now, your paths could cross. She smiled when I said this, like it brought her comfort.”

“You know the type - the ones who steal your heart and leave you floundering helplessly without it for half a decade, shoving other things into the gap where it used to be, but finding that they don't bloody fit”

“So if you ask me if I'm sad, I'll say yes, I'm sadder than I've ever been in my life. And if you ask me if I'm angry, I'll say definitely, because I feel like he's been stolen from me. But most importantly, I'm happy. Happy that I was lucky enough to call him my dad and my friend. So happy that it was worth all the struggle, and the fear, and the pain, because without all of that, you can never truly say you experienced the best bits.”

“Grief. I don't know how to describe it other than as a roller coaster that drops you into the pit of hell with the rats and the demons, and then lifts you up above the clouds to the place where heaven begins.”

“I still can't help but love Sienna, though, I adore her. looking at her still makes me melt somewhere deep in my soul. Her presence lifts me up more than anyone else I know. Thinking about her fills me with happiness. What we have is unique. But I have accepted that she will never be mine, so I have to just love her from a distance and move on. It's working. It really is. I am finally achieving peace.”

“I could train myself out of all this. Like a smoker, I could cut down. Like a drinker, I could kick the bottle. Like someone in love, I could learn to redesign the route to my heart so someone else stood a chance in hell of navigating it. I could do this.”

“This was it. It was pulse-racing, heart-wrenching, dizzying love. The kind that touches every one of your nerve endings and renders you almost insane. The kind I could not give into easily because it already hurt like hell before lift-off.”

“People do look different when you fall out of love with them. But then again, I wasn't sure if it had ever been love I'd felt for her, or for anyone in fact.”

“If you're worrying about yourself too much, help someone else who has real worries. Turn your anxiety into something productive.”

“I'm cautious with the love word because I really know what it means. I've been there, done that and I know what the implications are. I also know that people say they love people when they don't, and it often results in tears and avoidance of bars, supermarkets, even whole towns in extreme cases.”

“I didn't want him to be the one I avoided because he'd hurt me. If I was just his friend, then I would still be blessed. If that meant swallowing my pride and being his shoulder when he got hurt, or being the one he ranted at when he was angry; I was prepared to do it and to do it with dignity.”

“There is a little Juliet inside me, hoping I will lock eyes with my Romeo on the other side of a fish tank or through a gap in a library bookcase. Hell, even if it's behind the condiments section in a supermarket. I don't really mind.”

“Because the truth is, this is love, and it doesn't matter if you lose everything. Your job. Your home. Your car. Not as long as you have that person by your side.”

“Because I believe that love is an overwhelming, all-consuming force, and when its genuine you can't really ignore it. No matter how long it takes. It knocks down your door by force. It keeps you awake at night. It plagues your thoughts and burns your soul.”

“I am a desperate romantic. I love the idea of random collisions of the heart.”

“I believe that love is an overwhelming, all-consuming force, and when it’s genuine you can’t really ignore it. No matter how long it takes. It knocks down your door by force. It keeps you awake at night. It plagues your thoughts and burns your soul.”

“But if it is love, real love, then I want them to find each other. Because I believe that love is an overwhelming, all-consuming force, and when it's genuine you can't really ignore it. No matter how long it takes. It knocks down your door by force. It keeps you awake at night. It plagues your thoughts and burn your soul. If it is love, they won't need me at all. By telling my daughter that the man of her dreams loves her too, would I not be getting in the way? Meddling with fate?”