Karina Halle

“Mommy, he told me he’s going to take me away for some candy and I can pet his fat dog.”

“Guess that’s a thing you still do. You know, look like a douchebag.”

“Oh, I had no fucking idea what I was thinking about. All booze plus no meds makes Dex a crazy boy.”

“I don't know what I'd do if this wouldn't go father. Jack off for eternity, probably.”

“I wanted nothing but her, now and forever.”

“Sir Swagger Douchington the Fuck”

“I need you,” she said with such determination that it was like declaring war. I watched her lips as she said it. If she wanted war, she was going to get war.I smiled.Then I threw caution to the wind and did the thing I’d been dreaming about doing. I lunged for her, grabbing her face in my hands, bringing her mouth to mine.”

“You, sir, are asking for trouble.….Fuck trouble. I wasn’t asking for it.I was inviting it.”

“She needs to let loose, I thought you could help her.”“Isn’t that your job?”“Not yet.”

“Now it was my time to blush. Except that I’m a man and I don’t do that.”

“The song ended, but I kept my arms wrapped tight around her, not letting her move an inch. If she was having some internal battle again, she could do so in my arms. “Watcha doing, wifey?” I joked, secretly enjoying the sound of that.”

“I didn’t want to be Red Fox’s saviour, but I wanted to be hers.”

“She was mine. For the sake of appearances, she was my wife, but she was mine anyway. She didn’t know it yet, but I did. It was wrong and it made no sense, but she belonged with me. No one else, not anyone else.”

“I knew what song was next and I knew who I was dancing with. My wife.”

“The Dex Foray special involves two lubed fingers, a lot of tongue and a cigarette for afterwards.”

“I was a gentleman over everything. An ass-appreciating gentleman. We are the finest kind of man. I should open my own ass-appreciating gentleman’s club one day.”

“With one hand she popped the button on my pants. She dropped to her knees. I got hard instantly, knowing what was coming next.Me.”

“I love you Perry,” he whispered, mouth moving in my hair. “I love you so fucking much. And I’m losing myself. I’m losing myself to you and I don’t care anymore because there’s never been a better feeling in the whole fucking world. I love you. So much. Too much. Always.”

“This is me trying, Perry,” he said softly, the anger being drained of his face. “This is me taking my heart out of my chest and putting the bloody mess in your hands. I can’t give you much more than that.”

“I was trying to be a better man, Perry. For you.” I shifted in my seat. “Dex…” “And I’ll keep trying,” he quickly said, voice low and somber. “Until I get it right.”

“I certainly ain’t saying it’s impossible. But Ada, look at Perry. Do you think that’s what is happening?”She rolled her eyes and slammed the bat against her palm. “Holy fuck, yes, you retard! You have some inbreeding going down there in the South? Is that what’s wrong with you?”

“You still with your floozy girlfriend?” Ah, there is was. The elephant in the car…He gave her an incredulous look. “Obviously not.”She smacked him on his arm. “Don’t look at me like I asked a stupid question. Because it not a stupid question at all, and you damn well know it.”“Fine.”“So you broke up with her?”“Yes,” he said sharply.“Way to find your balls, man,” Ada congratulated him and sat back in her seat.”

“Kiddo, I’d let you brand me with a hot iron if you wanted to.”“Still a sucker for punishment?”He grinned. “Something like that.”

“Hey, kiddo,” Dex whispered. “It’s just me.”

“Who was that?" he whispered."Who?" I asked, playing dumb."That Ellie Watt. I know the real Ellie Watt and she’s not that much of a people person.""Which Ellie do you prefer?" I asked teasingly.He stopped walking and pulled me closer to him,staring down into my eyes."Whichever one I’ve got.”

“That is what I thought of you, Ellie. Heartless, reckless, selfish, and cruel."He was back to shooting me when my armor was down. I turned my face away from him, not wanting to let him see the hurt in my eyes. He reached up and put his fingers under my chin, bringing my face forward again, forcing me to look at him."Beautiful, sad, wounded, and lost," he continued. "A freak, a work of art, a liar, and a lover."His gaze was starting to eat away at my insides. Razor-blade butterflies whirled in my heart."I hate you, Ellie Watt," he whispered, lips coming closer to mine, "because I still love you after all these years.”

“You went shopping with Rebecca?' 'Yep,' I said, pulling the shoes out of the box. His brows went to the heavens.'Wow, those are like…Jenn shoes.''These are not hooker shoes,' I said defensively. 'Well played,' he said.”

“The things I want to do to you…” he whispered roughly. I took my hand behind his head and brought his ear down to my mouth. “Do them,” I breathed back, and licked the rim of his ear.He let out a small moan and suddenly his lips were on mine. The sweet business was out of the way.”

“And you and Dex?”“What about us?” …“What’s the deal with you?”“There is no deal. We’re just partners.”“Are you sure? Because we all have bets on whether you guys are banging each other or not.”

“For once, I felt everything. And the biggest thing I felt was the way I felt about you. That was like a hammer to the heart.”

“If I thought I was head over heels for him before, this time I was so far gone, it’s like I fell into my own grave. Head over heels and down a whole. Bury me with dirt, stick a stake into my heart, and call it a day.”

“No time for foreplay?” I teased breathlessly.His smile was sly. “Oh, we’ve had nothing but foreplay from the day we first met.”

“What if I really am alone?”“Baby, you aren’t alone. I’m here.”

“I still need you," I murmured. He rested his forehead against mine and closed his eyes, his breathing irregular. Then his lips found mine again. It made my heart ache, made my soul ache. I loved him far too much.”

“I have your back, OK? Don’t forget that. I won’t let you.”

“I hope next time you feel – well, retarded – about yourself, you’ll remember that I think you’re…”I looked up into his eyes. They were drunk, yes, but still absolutely mesmerizing.He didn’t finish his sentence. Instead he said, “Sorry I licked your face.”

“I guess I am just a pervert with rapist facial hair.”“Well, you’re my kind of pervert.”

“Dex,” I whispered.“Mmmm?” he grunted.“I hope you never stop feeling alive.”I could have sworn his heart skipped a few beats. He tensed. Then relaxed.“As long as you’re around,” he said softly, “I’ll be alive.”

“I just hated to think I looked like crap around tall, handsome men. Even if they were gingers.”

“You’re like a ghost magnet. Why do you think I like having you around?”My mouth dropped momentarily. “Because I’m awesome.”“Oh, well, that too.”

“Do you think you’re special, Perry?” he asked seriously.I winced. “A little bit. Maybe more in the Special Olympics kind of way.”

“Why are you so pissed off?" he asked, sounding genuinely surprised. Sometimes I wondered if Dex actually had any recollection of 90% of the conversations he was involved with.”

“It was fucking weird. They had gone from a sickening, "in love" couple doing a duet to the complete opposite in the span of two songs. Who knew the Beatles were still so controversial.”

“I can't ever lose what I just felt." He kissed my cheek. "I'm afraid if I did, I'd come looking for you too. I'm afraid I can relate...to him.”

“Another snowball, this time it impacted on my shoulder. I dusted the snow off my coat with my free hand and gave him the biggest stinkeye I could muster.“How old are you again? Twelve?”He grinned, teeth white as the snow he gathered. “Old enough to make you come, young enough to make you hate me for it.”“Oh jeez,” I muttered, shaking my head, and turned around.Bam.Snowball to the back of my head.”

“I love you,” he whispered. “From now until the end, under any name you choose.”

“If I’m a monster, then you must be the creator of them all. You’re my Dr. Frankenstein.”

“He was like a caring, hulking, nerd. And I wanted him.”

“If there was a moment that determined the course of my future, I'm pretty sure this was it. I had two somewhat simple choices. I could make a run for it and go back to Uncle Al's. Back to the bonfire where my cousins and dear sister would be drinking and revel in the normalcy of a Saturday night and forget I ever went to this horrid place and ran into this weirdo. Or I could go with said weirdo up the stairs in this decrepit old lighthouse, which was most likely condemned and unsafe, towards some unknown person (or thing) that was walking around, potentially waiting to murder us in horrific ways. It didn't seem like a very hard decision to make. In fact, I think 99.7% of people in the right frame of mind would have picked from column A and gone on with their merry lives. But for some freaking crazy reason, I thought that maybe, just maybe I should go with this stranger up those kelp-ridden stairs and toward the lair of unimaginable horror. You know, because it was the more interesting alternative.”

“It wasn't a goodbye kiss, it was the opposite. It was the start of something that would last forever.”