Kody Keplinger

“If Kate Winslet had been the Duff, Leonardo DiCaprio wouldn't have been after her in Titanic and that could have saved all of us a lot of tears.”

“How would you know?" I demanded, splashing water in Harrison's face. "You were watching him, too.""Too!" he cried. "I got you! Ha. You just admitted you were watching him. You love him. You so love him.”

“Me puse muy, muy borracho la noche de graduación, y cuando me desperté, alguna descarada y sexy zorra había robado mi virginidad.Pensé que habíamos tenido una gran noche, pero cuando traté de conseguir su número, prometió que nunca me vería de nuevo. Es algo que me rompió el corazón. Llámame romántico, pero nunca había esperado que mi primera vez fuera tan impersonal... - Nathan”

“No te amo. Amo a mi familia y tal vez aCasey y Jessica, pero el amor romántico lleva años y años en aparecer. Entonces no te amo. Pero admitiré que he pensado mucho en ti últimamente y definitivamente tengo sentimientos por ti… Otros sentimientos además de odio mayormente. Y tal vez es posible que en el futuro pueda amarte. Pero todavía quiero matarte la mayor parte del tiempo.”

“Llamar a Vikki una cualquiera o una perra era como llamar a alguien la Duff. Era insultante y doloroso, y era uno de esos títulos que solo alimentaban un miedo interno que toda chica debió tener de tiempo en tiempo. Sucia, perra, mojigata, idiota. Eran todos lo mismo. Toda chica se siente como si una de estas etiquetas sexistas la haya descrito hasta cierto punto.”

“Puta es sólo una palabra que la gente utiliza para hacer daño. Los hace sentir mejor acerca de sus propios errores. Usar ese tipo de palabras es más fácil que buscar la solución a la situación.”

“—Escúchame—Dijo. —No eres una puta. ¿Me estás escuchando, Bianca? Lo que si eres es inteligente, atrevida y sarcástica, cínica, neurótica, leal, compasiva. Eso es lo que eres, ¿de acuerdo? Tú no eres una puta ni algo remotamente similar. Sólo porque tienes algunos secretos y problemas, no estás más confundida que el resto de nosotros.”

“— No puedes tener suficiente de mí, ¿verdad? —Preguntó Wesley, se extendió sobre la espalda de nuevo con una sonrisa—. Eso suena muy bien para mí, pero si soy tan fantástico, deberías correr la voz con tus amigas. Dices que las adoras, por lo que deberías permitirles experimentar el mismo placer alucinante... tal vez al mismo tiempo.Es lo correcto.Le fruncí el ceño—. Cuando pienso que tal vez tienes alma, dices mierdas como esa.”

“¿Por qué no podía ser mi vida una comedia? Por otra parte, incluso en Friends tenían problemas.”

“En la película, la pobre Keira Knightley tiene que pasar por toda esa maldita tragedia con James McAvoy, pero si Keira no hubiera sido atractiva, el nunca se habría fijado en ella y no le habría roto el corazón. Al fin y al cabo todos sabemos eso de que “es mejor haber amado y perdido...”, todo ese rollo es una mierda.Esta teoría se aplica a un montón de películas. Piensa en ello. Si Kate winslet hubiese sido la “Duff”, Leonardo DiCaprio no se habría enamorado de ella en Titanic y nosotros nos habríamos ahorrado un montón de lágrimas. Si Nicole Kidman hubiese sido fea en ColdMountain, no tendría que haberse preocupado por Jude Law cuando se fue a la guerra. La lista es interminable.”

“A lot of people would kill for my life, but I didn’t even consider that. I took it—and you—for granted. I’m so, so sorry for that”

“No importa a donde vayas o con que te distraes, la realidad termina tocando a tu puerta en algún momento.”

“Nathan had to park his Honda a whole block from the party, which was a good thing for two reasons. First, it gave Bailey and me the chance to ditch him before we even got to the house. I don’t know about her, but I didn’t want to be seen with the guy wearing a shirt that said, MAY THE MASS TIMES ACCELERATION BE WITH YOU.”

“By the time we reached the front door of the party house—a total mansion, like Harrison had said—Nathan was far behind us. Well, he’d promised to stay out of our hair. “Wow,” I heard Bailey gasp as the front door swung open for us, though I wasn’t sure if that was her reaction to the freakishly large house or to the drop-dead-gorgeous guy standing in front of us. “Good evening, ladies,” he said, stepping aside to let us enter. Automatically, I found myself standing up taller and sliding my shoulder blades back for optimum cleavage exposure. It was like a flirting reflex. I just wished I wasn’t all sunburned. “Hello to you.” He grinned at me. A cocky, sexy grin. “I don’t believe we’ve met,” he said. He glanced at Bailey then. “Any of us. I’m sure I’d remember those pretty faces.” I swear, Bailey was blushing so hard I could feel the heat radiating from her body. “Oh, you’d remember,” I agreed, tossing back my hair and putting a hand on my hip. “I’m Whi—” “Whitley!” I jumped and spun around involuntarily. Harrison was standing beside me, looking thoroughly delighted. “Hello again, darling. You look gorgeous—and the lack of flip-flops is making my day. Those slingbacks are perfect!” I nodded, glancing over my shoulder at the hot guy, but he’d already moved on and was chatting with a group of kids a few feet away. Goddamn it. “Wesley is just so busy,” Harrison said, following my gaze. “You have to give him credit for being a great host. He talks to everyone. Seems like way too much work to me.”

“I took Russian in high school,” Nathan said, climbing out of the pool. He’d decided to swim laps that afternoon instead of going to the gym. “Did you?” Harrison asked, grinning at him. “Yeah.” Nathan grabbed his towel from the little patio table and began dabbing at his face. “But the only thing I remember is, Mozhno li kopirovat vashi domashnie zodaneeye?” “Let me guess,” I said. “You just asked me where the bathroom is, right?” “No.” He scoffed, flicking his wet towel at me. “I was beyond that basic stuff. I took two years of it. Give me some credit.” “Then what does it mean?” I asked. “It means, ‘Can I copy your homework?”

“Just remember to do what makes you happy, okay? Don’t lie to yourself because you think it’s safer. Realitydoesn’t work like that…. I think I told you that before.”She had.But I’d been running for so long I wasn’t sure what I wanted anymore.”

“I’dskipped the crush kiddie pool and jumped right into the deep, shark-infested ocean of emotions. And, if you’ll forgive the dramatic metaphor, I wasa lousy swimmer.”

“You *are* my family,' he said. The tears almost started up again. Those four little words meant so much to me - which was stupid, really. They were just words. But they were words I'd been wanting to hear, wanting to believe. *You are my family*.”

“Wow,' he said. 'Seriously - *wow*. I mean, what are the odds that of all the people Dad might marry, the chick's son is someone you've-''Trace!''Sorry. Okay, advice...hmm.”

“Graduation night was my last party,' he said. 'Or at least my last drink. After that night, I decided I was done with all of it.''Why? What changed?'A sly grin crept across Nathan's face. 'I got really, really wasted graduation night, and when I woke up, some sassy, sexy vixen had stolen my virginity.”

“While I'm sure this is going to be a fascinating story,' I interrupted. 'I don't care. I'm having a major parental crisis that sort of outshines your little tantrum, and frankly it seems like my dad agrees with you. I have a party to get ready for, can we do this later?”

“Go take out the trash, Potty Mouth.'She laughed and headed into the kitchen. 'Pissed!' she shouted as she walked through the dining room. 'Shit! Damn!”

“Are you guys getting to know each other pretty well? I'm sure it's a little bit awkward at first.''Yeah,' I said. 'I'd say we're getting to know each other *really* well. Wouldn't you, Nathan?'He kicked me under the table and mouthed, *Not funny*.”

“I don't really do friends,' I told him.'Good,' he said. 'I don't want you to "do" me. We've established the flaws in that plan already...”

“Joe!' he called. 'Hey, honey, can you get the pretty girl a Coke?''Only if you stop calling me *honey*,' the bartender, a bearded man in his thirties, replied. 'We've had this discussion before, Harrison.''Aw, Joe. It's so cute that you think I listen.”

“How is that possbile?' Harrison asked. 'He is so *hot*.''My dad? Christ, that's gross.''He is.''Ew.”

“I was supposed to be at the condo, wasting time on the beach, just Dad and me, figuring out college and my life and spending time together. Instead, I was in a new house with new people - including a future stepbrother who'd seen me naked.”

“Seriously, if the bastards cheat on you, then they don't deserve you anyway. If that's a legit fear, then you probably shouldn't be with them to begin with.”

“She's a Sophomore. Her name is Autumn Elliot. What the hell kind of name is Autumn? Why don't they just call her Fall or The Depressing Season Where Everything Starts to Die""It's a pretty name Chloe.""Fine," she huffed. "But getting your freak on in a public bathroom? Who does that?""Um, Chloe...""Okay, fine. I've done that." She flicked her hair over her shoulder. "Jesus, Lisa, help me out here. I'm trying to console you, but you're making it difficult.”

“Shut up, Kelsey, and just give Lissa a chance," Chloe snapped.Kelsey mocked surprise. "Oh my God, Chloe can speak? I thought her mouth only worked for sucking dicks. It's a miracle.”

“For a girl with such a fat ass, I felt pretty invisible.”

“I want more. I want everything. I want you.""Nathan...""I'm not settling for less, Whitley," he said. "And neither should you.”

“God really must have had a sense of humor, because if I had to name my biggest turn-on, it was literature. And he had just recommended a book that I didn’t know, that wasn’t taught in school. If I were single, there would be no better pick-up line.”

“Oh my God, Chloe can speak? I thought her mouth only worked for sucking dicks. It’s a miracle.”

“Anger was less painful than abandonment.”

“Hey Kid--so proud of you. so is emily. we wish we could be there, but here's a fat check to make up for it but dont go spending it all out on booze. call you soon.Love, the best big brother ever and Emily and Marie, too."I smiled. It was a mark of how much I loved my big brother that I found his lack of punctuation and proper grammar endearing.”

“Screw nightmares. I was waking up.”

“I'd say we're both pretty fucked up." "Very true.”

“This whole strike has turned into a way to fuck with people, Lissa," he snapped. "It was one thing when you were just boycotting sex, but now...Look at you. You're using sex to get what you want-playing with my feelings for your own benefit. That's why you came over, right? I'm not stupid. You're the one who's cruel, Lissa. Not me.”

“It's never too late.”

“I wasn't trying to drive you crazy, just to get your attention," he said. "Lissa, I never tried to use you. Everything that happened between us-I meant it. Including that kiss in the library. I tried to tell you the other day at my house. That this"-he held up our entwined hands-"is more than just a game to me. But...”

“It wasn't a game," Cash whispered. "Not to me.”

“Because I want to see you with someone better than him. Someone who will see how lucky they are to have you.”

“So I asked around about The Blonde,” she said, sitting down on my bed once the room was completely slumber party–ready. “She’s a sophomore. Her name is Autumn Elliot. What the hell kind of name is Autumn? Why don’t they just call her Fall or The Depressing Season When Everything Starts to Die.”

“Great. He was a hottie, a good kisser, and a literature buff. God really must have had a sense of humor, because if I had to name my biggest turn-on, it was literature. And he had just recommended a book that I didn’t know, that wasn’t taught in school. If I were single, there would be no better pick-up line. Suddenly, I found myself thinking back to Atonement—you know, the scene in the book where the two main characters have sex in the library? Even though Chloe said doing it against bookshelves would be really uncomfortable (and she’d probably know), it was still a fantasy of mine. Like, what’s more romantic than a quiet place full of books? But I shouldn’t have been thinking about my library fantasies. Especially while I was staring at Cash. In the middle of a library.”

“So when you’re nervous, you count?” “Not just when I’m nervous,” I said. “It’s… all the time. I count the seconds during pauses in conversations. I count the minutes when I’m waiting on something. Sometimes, when I’m kind of panicked or anxious, I count my heartbeats. Something about counting makes me feel like… like I have the power. Like knowing how much time has passed or how many steps I’ve taken from one place to another will somehow keep me in control of the situation.”

“Shave that Moses beard and you might have better luck. Women don’t want to kiss carpet, you know.”

“Maybe if you could put him on mute… and cut off his hands… maybe—just maybe—he’d be tolerable then.”

“Thanks,” Toby said. “And if Wesley breaks your heart, I promise to . . . well, I would say I’d kick his ass, but we bothknow that’s physically impossible.” He frowned down at his skinny arms. “So I’ll write him a strongly worded letter.”

“I was the Duff. And that was a good thing. Because anyone who didn't feel like the Duff must not have friends. Every girl feels unattractive sometimes. Why had it taken me so long to figure that out? Why had I been stressing over that dumb word for so long when it was so simple? I should be proud to be the Duff. Proud to have great friends who, in their minds, were my Duffs.”