“Though she hated to stop kissing, Luce held Daniel's warm face in her hands. She gazed into his violet eyes, trying to draw strength."I'm sorry," she said. "For running off like I did.""Don't be," he said,slowly and with absolute sincerity. "You had to go. It was preordained; it had to happen." He smiled again. "We did what we needed to do,Lucinda."A jet of warmth shot through her,making her dizzy. "I was starting to think I'd never see you again.""How many times have I told you that I will always find you?”
“Lucinda!" he shouted,but the beast had already dropped her.His whole world stopped.Daniel did not see where Lucifer went after that because he was diving across the sky toward Luce. The burning of her soul was so bright and so familiar. He shot forward, his wings clasped close to his body so that he fell faster than seemed possible, so fast that the world around him blurred.He reached out and-She landed in his arms.Immediately,his wings pulled forward, making a protective shield around her. She seemed startled at first,as if she'd just awakened from a terrible dream,and gazed deeply into his eyes, letting out all the air in her lungs. She touched his cheek,ran her fingers across the tingling ridges of his wings."At last." He breathed into her, finding her lips."You found me," she whispered."Always.”
“Of course,there had only been one place to find her.The first one.The beginning.Daniel tumbled toward the first life, ready to wait there for as long as it would take Luce to make her way there,too. He would take her in his arms, whisper in her ear, At last. I found you.I will never let you do.”
“Daniel hadn't given in once across the five thousand years she'd witnessed. No matter that they killed her again and again and denied him his one true love, he would not give in and choose a side. And even if he did somehow lose his resolve,she would be there to support him: She knew now that she was strong enough to carry Daniel if he faltered. Just as he'd carried her.”
“Then I'll cleave to my old self and spirit the full host of angels into the present with me.Even the ugly ones.”
“You may not believe it,but there are many who wish to wield the power that I wield.Who...adore me.""You're right.I don't believe you.""You just don't know enough.About anything. I've taken you on a tour of your past-shown you the futility of this existence,hoping to awaken you to the truth,and all I get from you is 'Daniel! I want Daniel!”
“With a loud whoosh he stretched his wings out,and then deftly wrapped them tight around her, a cradle of soft white holding the two of them fast."You really believe it?" she whispered. "That someday I'll live through this?""With all my heart and soul," he said, cupping her face in his hands, pulling his wings tighter around them both. "I will wait for you as long as it takes. I will love you every moment across time."By then,Luce was broiling hot. She cried out from the pain,thrashing in Daniel's arms as the heat overwhelmed her. She was burning his skin, but he never let her go.The moment had come. The starshot was tucked inside her dress,and this-right now-was when she would have used it.But she was never going to give up.Not on Daniel. Not when she knew,no matter how hard it got,that he would never give up on her.Her skin began to blister.The heat was so brutal,she could do nothing but shiver.And then she could only scream.Layla combusted,and as the flames engulfed her body,Luce felt her own body and the soul they were sharing untwine,seeking the fastest escape from the unforgiving heat. The column of fire grew taller and wider until it filled the room and the world,until it was everything,and Layla was nothing at all.”
“One day,our love will conquer this dark cycle.That's worth everything to me."Luce looked up and saw the love glowing in his eyes. He believed what he was saying. He didn't care if he suffered again and again; he'd forge on, losing her over and over,buoyed by the hope that one day this wouldn't be their end. He knew it was doomed,but he tried over and over again anyway,and he always would.His commitment to her,to them, touched a part of her that she'd thought she'd given up on.She still wanted to argue: This Daniel didn't know the challenges coming their way,the tears they would shed over the ages.He didn't know that she'd seen him in his moments of deepest desperation. What the pain of her deaths would do to him.But then-Luce knew.And that made all the difference in the world.Daniel's lowest moments had terrified her, but things had changed. All along, she'd felt bound to their love, but now she knew how to protect it.Now she had seen their love from so many different angles. She understood it in a way she'd never thought she would.If Daniel ever faltered,she could raise him up.She had learned how to do it from the best: from Daniel.Here she was,about to kill her soul, about to take away their love permanently, and five minutes alone with him brought her back to life.Some people spent their entire lives looking for love like this.Luce had had it all along.The future held no starshot for her. Only Daniel.Her Daniel, the one she'd left in her parent's backyard in Thunderbolt.She had to go."Kiss me," she whispered.He was seated on the steps with his knees parted just enough to let her body slide between them. She sank to her knees and faced him. Their foreheads were touching.The tips of their noses.Daniel took her hands. He seemed to want to tell her something,but he could not find the words."Please," she begged,her lips edging toward his. "Kiss me and set me free.”
“Layla!" Don bounded into her sight. The door behind her was still bolted. Where had he come from?The starshot tumbled from her hands and clattered to the floor. She snatched it up and slipped it back inside her dress. Bill was gone.But Don was-Daniel was right where she wanted him to be."What are you doing here?" Her voice broke with the force of having to act surprised to see him.He didn't seem to hear it.He rushed toward her and wrapped her in his arms. "Saving your life.""How did you get in?""Don't worry about that.No mortal man, no slab of stone can obstruct a love as true as ours. I will always find you."In his bare, bronzed arms, it was Luce's instinct to feel comforted. But she couldn't right then.Her heart felt ragged and cold.This easy happiness, these feelings of complete trust, every one of the lovely emotions Daniel had shown her how to feel in every life-they were torture to her now."Fear not," he whispered. "Let me tell you, my love, what happens after this life.You come back,you rise again. Your rebirth is beautiful and real.You come back to me,again and again-"The light from the lamp flickered and made his violet eyes sparkle.His body was so warm against hers."But I die again and again.""What?" He tilted his head.Even when his physique looked exotic to her, she knew his expressions so well-that bemused adoration when she expressed something he hadn't expected her to understand. "How do you-Never mind. It doesn't matter.What matters is that we will again be together.We will always find each other,always love each other, no matter what.I will never leave you."Luce fell to her knees on the stone steps. She hid her face in her hands. "I don't know how you can stand it.Over and over again,the same sadness-"He lifted her up. "The same ecstasy-""The same fire that kills everything-""The same passion that ignites it all again.You don't know.You can't remember how wonderful-""I've seen it.I do know."How she had his attention. He didn't seem sure whether or not to believe her, but at least he was listening. "What if there's no hope of anything ever changing?" she asked."There is only hope. One day, you will live through it.That absolute truth is the only thing that keeps me going. I will never give up on you. Even if it takes forever." He wiped away her tears with his thumb. "I'll love you with all my heart,in every life, through every death. I will not be bound by anything but my love for you.""But it's so hard.Isn't it hard for you? Haven't you ever thought,what if...""One day,our love will conquer this dark cycle.That's worth everything to me.”
“The footsteps behind her stopped. A warm brush of fingertips traveled up her arms as a firm chest pressed against her back. Daniel. She could sense his glow without even turning. She closed her eyes. His arms wrapped around her waist and his soft lips swept across her neck, stopping just below her ear."I found you," he whispered.She turned slowly in his arms. The sight of him took her breath away. He was still her Daniel, of course, but his skin was the color of rich hot chocolate,and his wavy black hair was cropped very short. He wore only a short linen loincloth,leather sandals, and a silver choker around his neck. His deep-set violet eyes swept over her, happy.He and Layla were deeply in love.She rested her cheek on his chest and counted the beats of his heart. Would this be the last time she did this,the last time he held her against his heart? She was about to do the right thing-the good thing for Daniel. But still it pained her to think about it. She loved him! If this journey had taught her anything, it was how much she truly loved Daniel Grigori. It hardly seemed fair that she was forced to make this decision.Yet here she was.In ancient Egypt.With Daniel. For the very last time. She was about to set him free.”
“No more dying?""Not unless you jump off a building or get into a car with a murderer or take a whole lot of Unisom or-""I get it," she cut him off.”
“She saw Daniel hovering over her in his simple peasant's clothes...but then, a moment later, he was bare-chested, with long blond hair...and suddenly he wore a knight's helmet, whose visor he lifted to kiss her lips...but before he did,he shifted into his present self, the Daniel she'd left in her parents' backyard in Thunderbolt when she stepped through into time.This was the Daniel, she realized, she'd been looking for all along. She reached for him,she called his name, but then he changed again. And again. She saw more Daniels than she'd ever thought possible,each one more gorgeous than the last.They folded into each other like a vast accordion, each image of him tilting and altering in the light of the sky behind him.The cut of his nose,the line of his jawbone, the tone of his skin,the shape of his lips, all whirled in and out of focus,morphing all the time. Everything changed except his eyes.His violet eyes always stayed the same. They haunted her,hiding something terrible,something she didn't understand. Something she didn't want to understand.Fear?In the visions,the terror in Daniel's eyes was so intense Luce actually wanted to look away from their beauty. What could someone as powerful as Daniel fear?There was only one thing: Luce's dying.She was experiencing a montage of her death over and over and over again. This was what Daniel's eyes looked like, throughout time,just before her life went up in flames. She had seen this fear in him before.She hated it because it always meant their time was over.She saw it now in every one of his faces. The fear flashed from infinite times and places. Suddenly,she knew there was more:He wasn't afraid for her,not because she was walking into the darkness of another death.He didn't fear that it might cause her pain.Daniel was afraid of her."Lu Xin!" his voice cried out to her from the battlefield. She could see him through the haze of visions.He was the only thing coming in clearly-because everything else around her was lit up startingly white.Everything inside her was,too.Was her love of Daniel burning her up? Was it her own passion,not his,that destroyed her every time?"No!" His hand reached out for hers. But it was too late.”
“Daniel could feel ir,like a layer of skin was lifting off his bones. His past self's body was slowly cleaving from his own.The venom of separation coursed through him,threading deep into the fibers of his wings.The pain was so raw it was nauseating, roiling deep inside him with great tidal swells. His vision clouded; ringing filled his ears.The starshot in his hand tumbled to the ground.Then,all at once, he felt a great shove and a sharp,cold breath of air.There was a long grunt and two thuds,and then-His vision cleared.The ringing ceased. He felt lightness, simplicity.Free.Miles lay on the ground below him, chest heaving. The starshot in Daniel's hand disappeared. Daniel spun around to find a specter of his past self standing behind him,his skin gray and his body wraithlike,his eyes and teeth coal-black,the starshot grasped in his hand. His profile wobbled in the hot wind,like the picture on a shorted-out television."I'm sorry," Daniel said,reaching forward and clutching his past self at the base of his wings.When Daniel lifted the shadow of himself off the ground, his body felt scant and insufficient.His fingers found the graying portal of the Announcer through which both Daniels had traveled just before it fell apart. "Your day will come," he said.Then he pitched his past self back into the Announcer.He watched the void fading in the hot sun. The body made a drawn-out whistling sound as it tumbled into time, as if it were falling off a cliff. The Announcer split into infinitesimal traces,and was gone.”
“Luce closed her eyes,trying to remember exactly what he'd looked like. There were no words for it.It was just an incredible, joyous connection."I saw him.""Who,Daniel? Yeah,I saw him,too. He was the guy who dropped the ax when it was his turn to do the chopping. Big mistake. Huge.""No,I really saw him. As he truly is." Her voice shook. "He was so beautiful.""Oh,that." Bill tossed his head, annoyed."I recognized him.I think I've seen him before.""Doubt it." Bill coughed. "That was the first and last time you'll be able to see him like that.You saw him, and then you died.That's what happens when mortal flesh looks upon an angel's unbridled glory. Instant death. Burned away by the angel's beauty.""No,it wasn't like that.""You saw what happened to everyone else. Poof. Gone." Bill plopped down beside her and patted her knee. "Why do you think the Mayans started doing sacrifices by fire after that? A neighboring tribe discovered the charred remains and had to explain it somehow.""Yes,they burst into flames right away. But I lasted longer-""A couple of extra seconds? When you were turned away? Congratulations.""You're wrong.And I know I've seen that before.""You've seen his wings before, maybe.But Daniel shedding his human guise and showing you his true form as an angel? Kills you every time.""No." Luce shook her head. "You're saying he can never show me who he really is?"Bill shrugged. "Not without vaporizing you and everyone around you.Why do you think Daniel's so cautious about kissing you all the time? His glory shines pretty damn bright when you two get hot and heavy."Luce felt like she could barely hold herself up. "That's why I sometimes die when we kiss?""How 'bout a round of applause for the girl, folks?" Bill said snarkily. "But what about all those other times, when I die before we kiss, before-""Before you even have a chance to see how toxic your relationship might become?""Shut up.""Honestly,how many times do you have to see the same story line before you realize nothing is ever going to change?""Something has changed," Luce said. "That's why I'm on this journey, that's why I'm still alive. If I could just see him again-all of him-I know I could handle it.""You don't get it." Bill's voice was rising. "You're talking about this whole thing in very mortal times." As he grew more agitated,spit flew from his lips. "This is the big time,and you clearly cannot handle it.""Why are you so angry all of a sudden?""Because! Because." He paced the ledge, gnashing his teeth. "Listen to me: Daniel slipped up this once, he showed himself,but he never does that again.Never.He learned his lesson. Now you've learned one,too: Mortal flesh cannot gaze upon an angel's true form without dying.”
“The crowd as silent,holding their breaths.Hot wind rustled in the trees as the ax gleamed in the sun.Luce could feel that the end was coming,but why? Why had her soul dragged her here? What insight abouther past,or the curse, could she possibly gain from having her head cut off?Then Daniel dropped the ax to the ground."What are you doing?" Luce asked.Daniel didn't answer.He rolled back his shoulders, turned his face toward the sky, and flung out her arms. Zotz stepped forward to interfere,but when he touched Daniel's shoulder,he screamed and recoiled as if he'd been burned.And then-Daniel's white wings unfurled from his shoulders.As they extended fully from his sides,huge and shockingly bright against the parched brown landscape, they sent twenty Mayans hurtling backward.Shouts rang out around the cenote:"What is he?""The boy is winged!""He is a god! Sent to us by Chaat!"Luce thrashed against the ropes binding her wrists and her ankles.She needed to run to Daniel.She tried to move toward him,until-Until she couldn't move anymore.Daniel's wings were so bright they were almost unbearable. Only, now it wasn't just Daniel's wings that were glowing. It was...all of him. His entire body shone.As if he'd swallowed the sun.Music filled the air.No,not music, but a single harmonious chord.Deafening and unending,glorious and frightening.Luce had heard it before...somewhere. In the cemetery at Sword&Cross, the last night she'd been there,the night Daniel had fought Cam,and Luce hadn't been allowed to watch.The night Miss Sophia had dragged her away and Penn had died and nothing had ever been the same.It had begun with that very same chord,and it was coming out of Daniel.He was lit up so brightly,his body actually hummed.She swayed where she stood,unable to take her eyes away.An intense wave of heat stroked her skin.Behind Luce,someone cried out.The cry was followed by another,and then another,and then a whole chorus of voices crying out.Something was burning.It was acrid and choking and turned her stomach instantly. Then,in the corner of her vision,there was an explosion of flame, right where Zotz had been standing a moment before. The boom knocked her backward,and she turned away from the burning brightness of Daniel,coughing on the black ash and bitter smoke.Hanhau was gone,the ground where she'd stood scorched black.The gap-toothed man was hiding his face,trying hard not to look at Daniel's radiance.But it was irresistible.Luce watched as the man peeked between his fingers and burst into a pillar of flame.All around the cenote,the Mayans stared at Daniel.And one by one,his brilliance set them ablaze.Soon a bright ring of fire lit up the jungle,lit up everyone but Luce."Ix Cuat!" Daniel reached for her.His glow made Luce scream out in pain,but even as she felt as if she were on the verge of asphyxiation, the words tumbled from her mouth. "You're glorious.""Don't look at me," he pleaded. "When a mortal sees an angel's true essence, then-you can see what happened to the others.I can't let you leave me again so soon.Always so soon-""I'm still here," Luce insisted."You're still-" He was crying. "Can you see me? The true me?""I can see you."And for just a fraction of a second,she could.Her vision cleared.His glow was still radiant but not so blinding.She could see his soul. It was white-hot and immaculate,and it looked-there was no other way to say it-like Daniel. And it felt like coming home.A rush of unparalleled joy spread through Luce.Somewhere in the back of her mind,a bell of recognition chimed. She'd seen him like this before.Hadn't she?As her mind strained to draw upon the past she couldn't quite touch,the light of him began to overwhelm her."No!" she cried,feeling the fire sear her heart and her body shake free of something.”
“Daniel came up and walked beside her, and the other victor walked beside Ghanan.For the briefest instant,Daniel's fingertips grazed her bound wrists. Ix Caut tingled at the touch.Just outside the temple door,the four drummers were waiting on the ledge. They fell in line behind the processional and, as the party descended the pyramid's steep steps, played the same hectic beats Luce had heard when she'd first arrived in this life. Luce focused on walking,feeling as if she were riding a tide instead of choosing to put one foot in front of the other,down the pyramid,and then, at the base of the steps,along the wide, dusty path that led to her death.The drums were all she could hear, until Daniel leaned in and whispered, "I'm going to save you."Something deep inside Ix Caut soared. This was the first time he had ever spoken to her in this life."How?" she whispered back, leaning toward him,aching for him to free her and fly her far,far away."Don't worry." His fingertips found hers again,brushing them softly. "I promise,I'll take care of you."Tears stung her eyes.The ground was still searing the soles of her feet,and she was still marching to the place where Ix Caut was supposed to die, but for the first time since arriving in this life,Luce was not afraid.”
“Luce ignored the girls and felt around Ix Caut's own crippling fear. Something was running through her mind-a prayer. But not a prayer of sacrificial preparation. No,Ix Caut was praying for Daniel.Luce knew that the thought of him made Ix Caut's skin flush and her heart beat faster.Ix Caut had loved him her whole life-but only from afar. He'd grown up a few buildings away from her family's home. Sometimes he traded avocados to her mother at the market. Ix Caut had been trying for years to get up the courage to talk to him.The knowledge that he was at the ball court now tormented her.Ix Caut was praying, Luce realized,that he would lose. Her one prayer was that she did not want to die at his hand.”
“Will Daniel win or lose?" Luce asked, knowing the answer before the words had even left her lips."I can see how the idea of Daniel decapitating you does not maybe scream out romance," Bill said, "but really, what's the difference between his killing you by fire and by the sword?""Daniel wouldn't do that."Bill hovered in the air in front of Luce. "Wouldn't he?”
“Ah-there's our boy!" Bill pointed at the head of the crowd as they neared the stadium.A lean,muscular boy was running, faster than the others,his back to Luce. His hair was dark brown and shiny, his shoulders deeply tanned and painted with intersecting red-and-black bands. When he turned his head slightly to the left,Luce caught a quick glimpse of his profile.He was nothing like the Daniel she had left in her parents' backyard. And yet-"Daniel!" Luce said. "He looks-""Different and also precisely the same?" Bill asked."Yes.""That's his soul you recognize. Regardless of how you two may look on the outside,you'll always know each other's souls."It hadn't occured to Luce until now how remarkable it was that the recognized Daniel in every life. Her soul found his. "That's...beautiful."Bill scratched at a scab on his arm with a gnarly claw. "If you say so.”
“Ix who?""Ix Caut. Your name in this life meant 'Little Snake.'" Bill watched her face change. "It was a term of endearment in the Mayan culture. Sort of.""The same way getting your head impaled on a stick was an honor?"Bill rolled his stone eyes. "Stop being so ethnocentric.That means thinking your own culture is superior to other cultures.""I know what it means," she said, working the band into her dirty hair. "But I'm not being superior. I just don't think having my head stuck on one of these racks would be so great." There was a faint thrumming in the air,like faraway drumbeats."That's exactly the sort of thing Ix Caut would say! You always were a little bit backward!""What do you mean?""See,you-Ix Caut-were born during the Wayeb',which are these five odd days at the end of Mayan year that everyone gets real superstitious about because they don't fit into the calendar. Kind of like leap-year days.It's not exactly lucky to be born during the Wayeb'. So no one was shocked when you grew up to be an old maid.”
“Then Daniel stepped forward and a trumpet sounded, followed by a drum. The dance was beginning. He took her hand. When he spoke, he spoke to her, not to the audience,as the other players did."The fairest hand I ever touched," Daniel said. "O Beauty, till now I never knew thee." As if the lines had been written for the two of them.They began to dance,and Daniel locked eyes with her the whole time. His eyes were crystal clear and violet, and the way they never strayed from hers chipped away at Luce's heart. She knew he'd loved her always,but until this moment,dancing with him on the stage in front of all these people,she had never really thought about what it meant.It meant that when she saw him for the first time in every life,Daniel was already in love with her. Every time. And always had been. And every time, she had to fall in love with him from scratch.He could never pressure her or push her into loving him. He had to win her anew each time.Daniel's love for her was one long, uninterrupted stream.It was the purest form of love there was,purer even than the love Luce returned. His love flowed without breaking,without stopping. Whereas Luce's love was wiped clean with every death, Daniel's grew over time, across all eternity. How powerfully strong must it be by now? Hundreds of love stacked one on top of the other? It was almost too massive for Luce to comprehend.He loved her that much,and yet in every lifetime,over and over again,he had to wait for her to catch up.All this time,they had been dancing with the rest of the troupe, bounding in and out of the wings at breaks in the music,coming back onstage for more gallantry,for longer sets with more ornate steps,until the whole company was dancing.At the close of the scene,even though it wasn't in the script,even though Cam was standing right there watching,Luce held fast to Daniel's hand and pulled him to her,up against the potted orange trees.He looked at her like she was crazy and tried to tug her to the mark dictated by her stage directions. "What are you doing?" he murmured. He had doubted her before,backstage when she'd tried to speak freely about her feelings.She had to make him believe her.Especially if Lucinda died tonight,understanding the depth of her love would mean everything to him. It would help him to carry on,to keep loving her for hundreds more years, through all the pain and hardship she'd witnessed,right up to the present.Luce knew that it wasn't in the script, but she couldn't stop herself: She grabbed Daniel and she kissed him.She expected him to stop her,but instead he swooped her into his arms and kissed her back.Hard and passionately, responding with such intensity that she felt the way she did when they were flying,though she knew her feet were planted on the ground.For a moment, the audience was silent. Then they began to holler and jeer.Someone threw a shoe at Daniel, but he ignored it. His kisses told Luce that he believed her,that he understood the depth of her love,but she wanted to be absolutely sure."I will always love you,Daniel." Only, that didn't seem quite right-or not quite enough. She had to make him understand,and damn the consequences-if she changed history,so be it. "I'll always choose you." Yes, that was the word. "Every single lifetime, I'll choose you.Just as you have always chosen me.Forever."His lips parted.Did he believe her? Did he already know? It was a choice, a long-standing, deep-seated choice that reached beyond anything else Luce was capable of.Something powerful was behind it.Something beautiful and-Shadows began to swirl in the rigging overhead. Heat quaked through her body, making her convulse,desperate for the fiery release she knew was coming.Daniel's eyes flashed with pain. "No," he whispered. "Please don't go yet."Somehow,it always took both of them by surprise.”
“The audience roared and applauded again. A rush of actors exited the stage and filled the space around her. Shakespeare had already slipped away. She could see Daniel on the opposite wing of the stage.He towered over the other actors,regal and impossibly gorgeous.It was her cue to walk onstage. This was the start of the party scene at Lord Wolsey's estate, where the king-Daniel-would perform an elaborate masque before taking Anne Boleyn's hand for the first time. They were supposed to dance and fall heavily in love.It was supposed to be the very beginning of a romance that changed everything.The beginning.But for Daniel,it wasn't the beginning at all.For Lucinda,however, and for the character she was playing-it was love at first sight. Laying eyes on Daniel had felt like the first real thing ever to happen to Lucinda,just as it had felt for Luce at Sword & Cross. Her whole world had suddenly meant something in a way it never had before.”
“William Shakespeare. She knew him. They were,the three of them-Lucinda,Daniel,and Shakespeare-friends. There had been a summer afternoon when Daniel had taken Lucinda to visit Shakespeare at his home in Stratford. Toward sunset,they'd sat in the library,and while Daniel worked on his sketches at the window, Will had asked her question after question-all the while taking furious notes-about when she'd first met Daniel, how she felt about him, whether she thought she could one day fall in love.Aside from Daniel,Shakespeare was the only one who knew the secret of Lucinda's indentity-her gender-and the love the players shared offstage. In exchange for his discretion,Lucinda was keeping the secret that Shakespeare was present that night at the Globe. Everyone else in the company assumed that he was in Stratford, that he'd handed over the reins of the theater to Master Fletcher.Instead,Will appeared incognito to see the play's opening night.When she returned to his side,Shakespeare gazed deep into Lucinda's eyes. "You've changed.""I-no,I'm still"-she felt the soft brocade around her shoulders. "Yes, I found the cloak.""The cloak,is it?" He smiled at her, winked. "It suits you.”
“He raised an eyebrow. "Where did you get this? Is our Anne Boleyn suddenly from Mars?" He chuckled. "I always thought she hailed from Wiltshire."Luce's mind raced to catch up. She was playing Anne Boleyn? She'd never read this play, but Daniel's costume suggested he was playing the king, Henry VIII."Mr. Shakespeare-ah,Will-thought it would look good-""Oh,Will did?" Daniel smirked, bot believing her at all but seeming not to care. It was strange to feel that she could do or say almost anything and Daniel would still find it charming. "You're a little bit mad, aren't you, Lucinda?""I-well-"He brushed her cheek with the back of his finger. "I adore you.""I adore you,too." The words tumbled from her mouth,feeling so real and so true after the last few stammering lies. It was like letting out a long-held breath. "I've been thinking, thinking a lot,and I wanted to tell you that-that-""Yes?""The truth is that what I feel for you is...deeper than adoration." She pressed her hands over his heart. "I trust you. I trust your love. I know how strong it is,and how beautiful." Luce knew that she couldn't come right out and say what she really meant-she was supposed to be a different version of herself,and the other times,when Daniel had figured out who she was, where she'd come from,he'd clammed up immediately and told her to leave. But maybe if she chose her words carefully, Daniel would understand. "It may seem like sometimes I-I forgot what you mean to me and what I mean to you,but deep down...I know.I know because we are meant to be together.I love you, Daniel."Daniel looked shocked. "You-you love me?""Of course." Luce almost laughed at how obvious it was-but then she remembered: She had no idea which moment from her past she'd walked into.Maybe in this lifetime they'd only exchanged coy glances.Daniel's chest rose and fell violently and his lower lip began to quiver. "I want you to come away with me," he said quickly.There was a desperate edge to his voice.Luce wanted to cry out Yes!, but something held her back.It was so easy to get lost in Daniel when his body was pressed so close to hers and she could feel the heat coming off his skin and the beating of his heart through his shirt.She felt she could tell him anything now-from how glorious it had felt to die in his arms in Versailles to how devastated she was now that she knew the scope of his suffering. But she held back: The girl he thought she was in this lifetime wouldn't talk about those things, wouldn't know them. Neither would Daniel. So when she finally opened her mouth,her voice faltered.Daniel put a finger over her lips. "Wait. Don't protest yet. Let me ask you properly.By and by, my love."He peeked out the cracked wardrobe door, toward the curtain.A cheer came from the stage.The audience roared with laughter and applause. Luce hadn't even realized the play had begun."That's my entrance.I'll see you soon." He kissed her forehead,then dashed out and onto the stage.”
“But Daniel wouldn't kiss her the way she wanted.The closer she pressed to him, the farther back he leaned.Finally he pushed her away completely. He held on only to her hands, as if the rest of her were dangerous."Lady." He kissed the very tips of her fingers, making her shiver. "Would I be too bold to say your love makes you unmannerly?""Unmannerly?" Luce blushed.Daniel took her back into his arms, slowly, a bit nervously. "Good Lucinda, you must not find yourself in this place dressed as you are." His eyes kept returning to her dress. "What clothes are these? WHere is your costume?" He reached into a wardrobe and flicked through the clothes pegs.Quickly,Daniel began to unlace his boots, tossing them on the floor with two thuds. Luce tried not to gape when he dropped his trousers.He wore short gray pantaloons underneath that left very little to the imagination.Her cheeks burned as Daniel briskly unbuttoned his white shirt. He yanked it off,exposing the full beauty of his chest.Luce sucked in her breath. The only things missing were his unfurled wings. Daniel was so impeccably gorgeous-and he seemed to have no idea of the effect he was having on her by standing there in his underwear.She gulped,fanning herself. "Is it hot in here?”
“Touching him again reminded her of Versailles.She wanted to thank him for saving her from marrying the king. And to beg him never to hurt himself again as he'd done in Tibet. She wanted to ask what he'd dreamed about when he'd slept for days after she'd died in Prussia. She wanted to hear what he'd said to Luschka right before she died that awful night in Moscow. She wanted to pour out her love, and break down and cry,and let him know that every second of every lifetime she'd ben through,she had missed him with all her heart.”
“We're at the opening of the Globe." She thought back to Daniel's words under the peach trees at Sword & Cross. "Daniel told me we were here.""Sure,you were here," Bill said. "About fourteen years ago.Perched on your older brother's shoulder. You came with your family to see Julius Caesar."Bill hovered in the air a foot in front of her. It was unappetizing, but the high collar around her neck actually seemed to hold its shape. She almost resembled the sumptuously dressed women in the higher boxes."And Daniel?" she asked."Daniel was a player-""Hey!""That's whay they called the actors." Bill rolled his eyes. "He was just starting out then. To everyone else in the audience, his debut was utterly forgettable. But to little three-year-old Lucinda"-Bill shrugged-"it put the fire in you. You've been quote-unquote dying to get onstage ever since.Tonight's your night.""I'm an actor?”
“You've circled the globe to find yourself in the Globe,milady." Bill sketched a little bow."The Globe Theatre?" Luce ducked as the woman in front of her discarded a gnawed-on turkey leg by tossing it over her shoulder. "You mean, like, Shakespeare?""Well, he claims to be retired. You know those artist types. So moody." Bill swooped down near the ground, tugging at the hem of her dress and humming to himself."Othello happened here," Luce said, taking a moment to let it all sink in. "The Tempest. Romeo and Juliet. We're practically standing in the center of all the greatest love stories ever written.""Actually,you're standing in walnut shells.""Why do you have to be so glib about everything? This is amazing!""Sorry,I didn't realize we'd need a moment of bardolatry." His words came out lisped because of the needle clipped between his jagged teeth. "Now stand still.""Ouch!" Luce yelped as he jabbed sharply into her kneecap. "What are you doing?""Un-Anachronizing you.These folks'll pay good money for a freak show, but they're expecting it to stay onstage.”
“Where did they go?""Don't know." The prisoner cracked a smile too big for his thin face. "I don't think they did, either. You should have seen how long it took them to open an Announcer. Looked like couple of bumbling fools."Daniel felt himself almost begin to laugh.”
“I've missed you so much."Daniel chuckled. "I've missed you, too, these past...three hours. Are-are you all right?"Luce ran her fingers through Daniel's silky blond hair. "I just needed to get some air,to find you." She squeezed hi tightly.Daniel narrowed his eyes. "I don't think we should be out here,Lys. They must be expecting you back in the receiving room.""I don't care.I won't go back in there. And I would never marry that pig. I will never marry anyone but you.""Shhh." Daniel winced,stroking her cheek. "Someone might hear you. They've cut off heads for less than that.”
“She knew far too much about him. She knew everything. Like how the royal ladies-in-waiting swapped bawdy jokes about the sad size of the duke's scepter.”
“You're in there somewhere." He tapped at her collarbone. "You'll pop out again when-Well,when the time is right. But for now,you've slipped entirely inside your past. Like a cute little turtle in a borrowed shell.Except it's more than that.When you're in Lys's body, your very beings are entwined, so all sorts of good stuff comes with the package.Her memories,her passions,her manners-lucky for you.Of course,you also have to grapple with her shortcomings.This one,if I recall,puts her foot in her mouth with some regularity.So watch out.""Amazing," Luce whispered. "So if I could just find Daniel,I'd be able to feel exactly what she feels toward him.""Sure,I guess,but you do realize that once I snap my fingers,Lys has obligations at this ball that don't include Daniel.This isn't really his scene,and by that I mean,no way the guards would let a poor stable boy in here."Luce didn't care about any of that. Poor stable boy or not,she would find him. She couldn't wait. Inside Lys's body she could even hold him, maybe even kiss him.The anticipation of it was almost overwhelming."Hello?" Bill flicked a hard finger against her temple. "You ready yet? Get in there,see what you can see-then get out while the getting's good, if you know what I mean."Luce nodded.She straightened Lsys's black gown and held her head a little higher. "Snap to it.""And...go." Bill snapped his fingers.”
“They turned to look at her and all three pairs of eyes narrowed, as if they could tell instantly that she had not been bred to attend high-society balls."Ignore them," Bill said. "There are snobs in every lifetime. In the end, they've got nothing on you."Luce nodded,falling behind the trio, who passed through a set of mirrored doorways into the ballroom. The ultimate ballroom. The ballroom to end all ballrooms.Luce couldn't help herself. She stopped in her tracks and whispered, "Wow.”
“Now aren't you glad I made you take a bath?" Bill asked. "One less bottle of eau de reekette punching holes in l'ozone.”
“Oooh!" Bill squealed. "Very rococo.""So,I'm really doing this? I'm just going to go down there and pretend-""No pretending." Bill shook his head. "Own it. Own that cleavage, girl, you know you want to.""Okay,I am pretending you didn't say that." Luce laughed-winced. "So I go downstairs and 'own it' or whatever. But what do I do when I find my past self? I don't know anything about her.Do I just-""Take her hand," Bill said cryptically. "She'll be very touched by the gesture,I'm sure.”
“Her face shimmered with a dusting of powder and rouge. She was wearing so many undergarments that it felt as though someone had draped a fifty-pound weight over her body.How did girls move in these things?Let alone dance?As Anne-Marie drew the corset tighter around her torso, Luce gaped at her reflection. The wig made her look five years older.And she was sure she'd never had this much cleavage before. In any of her lives.”
“She gasped again,this time from fear of heights."Breathe," Bill coached her. "More people pass out up here from panicking over not getting enough oxygen than from actually not getting enough oxygen.”
“What is he doing?" she finally whispered.Bill appeared behind her and flitted around her shoulders. "Looks like he's sleeping.""But why? I didn't even know angels need to sleep-""Need isn't the right word. They can sleep if they feel like it.Daniel always sleeps for days after you die." Bill tossed his head,seeming to recall something unpleasant. "Okay,not always. Most of the time.Must be pretty taxing,to lose the one thing you love. Can you blame him?""S-sort of," Luce stammered. "I'm the one who bursts into flames.""And he's the one who's left alone. The age-old question.Which is worse?”
“Here," he said,holding out a dark mink coat. "Thought you might be cold.""Where did you-""I yoinked it off a broad coming home from the market back there.Don't worry,she had enough natural padding already.""Bill!""Hey,you needed it!" He shrugged. "Wear it in good health.”
“Eh? How 'bout that?" Bill nudged her. "Did I promise to show you love or did I promise to show you love?""Sure,they seem like they're in love." Luce shrugged. "But-""But what?Do you have any idea how painful that is? Look at that guy. He makes getting inked look like being caressed by a soft breeze."Luce squirmed on the branch. "Is that the lesson here? Pain equals love?""You tell me," Bill said. "It may surprise you to hear this,but the ladies aren't exactly banging down Bill's door.""I mean,if I tattooed Daniel's same on my body would that mean I loved him more than I already do?""It's a symbol,Luce." Bill let out a raspy sigh. "You're being too literal. Think about it this way: Daniel is the first good-looking boy LuLu has ever seen. Until he washed ashore a few months ago, this girl's whole world was her father and a few fat natives.""She's Miranda," Luce said, remembering the love story from The Tempest, which she'd read in her tenth-grade Shakespeare seminar."How very civilized of you!" Bill pursed his lips with approval. "They are liek Ferdinand and Miranda: The handsome foreigner shipwrecks on her shores-""So,of course it was love at first sight for LuLu," Luce murmured. This was what she was afraid of: the same thoughtless,automatic love that had bothered her in Helston."Right," Bill said. "She didn't have a choice but to fall for him.But what's interesting here is Daniel. You see, he didn't have to teach her to craft a woven sail, or gain her father's trust by producing a season's worth of fish to cure,or exhibit C"-Bill pointed at the lovers on the beach-"agree to tattoo his whole body according to her local custom.It would have been enough if Daniel had just shown up.LuLu would have loved him anyway.""He's doing it because-" Luce thought aloud. "Because he wants to earn her love.Because otherwise,he would just be taking advantage of their curse. Because no matter what kind of cycle they're bound to,his love for her is...true.”
“Look,let me give you the CliffNotes: You're a bitch in this life and Daniel doesn't care.Shocker! He courts you for a few weeks,there's some exchanging of flowers.A big kiss and then kaboom. Okay? Not much more to see.""You don't understand.""What? I don't understand that Victorians are as stuffy as an attic and as boring as watching wallpaper peel? Come on,if you're going to zigzag through your past,make it count. Let's hit some highlights.Luce didn't budge. "Is there a way to make you disappear?""Do I have to stuff you in this Announcer like a cat in a suitcase? Let's move!""I need to see that he loves me, not just some idea of me because of some curse that he's bound to.I need to feel like there's something stronger keeping us together. Something real."Bill took a seat next to Luce on the grass. Then he seemed to think better of it and actually crawled onto her lap. At first,she wanted to swat him, and the flies buzzing around his head,but when he looked up at her,his eyes appeared sincere."Honey,Daniel loving the real you is the last thing you should be worried about. You're freaking soul mates. You two coined the phrase. You don't have to stick around here to see that.It's in every life.”
“Hey,it was a valiant effort.You really got out there in the trenches this time.”
“And she never wanted to be around Cam. In her own lifetime or any other one.”
“As soon as Roland was gone,the cupboard door swung open, banging the back of her leg.Bill popped out,gasping for air loudly as if he'd been holding his breath the whole time."I could wring your neck right now!" he said,his chest heaving."I don't know why you're all out of breath. It's not like you even breathe.""It's for effect! All the trouble I go through to camoflage you here and you go and out yourself to the first guy who walks the through the door."Luce rolled her eyes. "Roland's not going to make a big deal out of seeing me here.He's cool.""Oh,he's so cool," Bill said. "He's so smart. If he's so great,why didn't he tell you what I know about not keeping one's distance from one's past? About getting"-he paused dramatically, widening his stone eyes-"inside?"Now she leaned down toward him. "What are you talking about?"He crossed his arms over his chest and wagged his stone tongue. "I'm not telling.""Bill!" Luce pleaded."Not yet, anyway.First let's see how you do tonight.”
“So I'll be careful-""There is no careful. You are a bull in the china shop of love.You'll have no way of knowing what you've broken or how precious it may be.Any change you enact is not going to be obvious. There will be no great sign reading IF YOU VEER RIGHT,YOU SHALL BE A PRINCESS, VERSUS IF YOU VEER LEFT,YOU'LL REMAIN A SCULLERY MAID FOREVER.""Come on,Roland,don't you think I have slightly loftier goals than ending up a princess?" Luce said sharply."I could venture a guess that there is a curse you want to put an end to?"Luce blinked at him,feeling stupid."Right,then,best of luck!" Roland laughed brightly.”
“So Bill thought she was being whiny. She couldn't help it.She was inches away from a breakdown."I hate this job.I hate this place. I hate this stupid solstice party and this stupid pheasant souffle-""Lucinda will be at the party tonight," Bill said suddenly. His voice was infuriatingly calm. "She happens to adore the Constances' pheasant souffle.”
“This is not what I had in mind," she muttered to Bill,who was hovering,always,on the rim of the cupboard next to her washtub. She still wasn't used to being the only one in the kitchen who could see him. It made her nervous every time he hovered over other members of the staff,making dirty jokes that only Luce could hear and no one-besides Bill-ever laughed at."You children of the millenium have absolutely no work ethic," he said. "Keep your voice down,by the way."Luce unclenched her jaw. "If scrubbing this disgusting soup tureen had anything to do with understanding my past, my work ethic would make your head spin. But this is pointless." She waved a cast iron skillet in Bill's face.Its handle was slick with pork grease. "Not to mention nauseating.”
“I'm sorry," Lucinda said,pressing her hands over her heart. "I don't know what came over me.I've never done anything like that..."Daniel wasn't going to argue with her now,though she'd slapped him so many times over the years that Arriane kept a tally in a little spiral notebook marked You're Fresh.”
“Daniel murmured something like yes, he wouldn't miss it,but he was clearly distracted. He kept looking away from the woman. His eyes darted around the lawn, as if he sensed Luce behind the roses.When his gaze swept over the bushes where she crouched,they flashed the most intense shade of violet.”
“Your past self's family was rich. Filthy rich.You'll see when you meet her.She goes by Lucinda and thinks your nickname is an absolute abomination, by the way." Bill pinched his nose and lifted it hight in the air,giving a pretty laughable imitation of a snob. "She's rich, yes,but you, my dear, are a time-traveling intruder who knows not the ways of this high society. So unless you want to stick out like a Manchester seamstress and get shown the door before you even get to have a chat with Lucinda, you need to go undercover. You're a scullery maid. Serving girl. Chamber-bot changer. It's really up to you.Don't worry,I'll stay out of your way.I can disappear in the blink of an eye.”