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Liz Rettig

My name is Liz Rettig and I am an author. Luckily I had an unhappy childhood, an angst ridden adolescence, and my adult years have been characterised by an almost unremitting catalogue of failures. The ideal background then to nurture an author's talent. I write funny romantic novels mainly for teens but loads of adults read them so they can look back and laugh (or cringe). You can find out more about me and my books plus read some fun stuff about dating, love and writing on my website http://www.lizrettig.com


“So tell me what's wrong, Liz.'Liz stared at Julian's picture again. 'Oh Julian, Julian,' she sobbed. 'How could this have happened to us?''It's Julian isn't it?' I said, gently. 'Something's happened.'Liz stopped sobbing. 'Of course it's Julian, you idiot.'Charming.”
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“Gary didn't get up until 11:30, but I managed to squeeze ten minutes alone with him in the kitchen before Chris drove me home. Asked him how things had gone with Samantha.'Not entirely successful.''Told you so.''Might have been better if I hadn't spotted the open balcony door and decided to climb up and sneak in.''You idiot Gary. Bet Samantha freaked out.''Actually, no, she didn't. But the girl whose flat I broke into did. Those balconies all look the same you know.''Oh my God.''Yeah she made quite a fuss. Wouldn't let me explain- just ran out screaming and called the police. Thank God Samantha was next door and heard her. She managed to convince the girl I wasn't a vampire or pervert prowler but an upright citizen who'd made an honest mistake.''Idiot, you mean.'Gary grinned. 'She may have used that term.”
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“As I hurried along I was thinking how great it was to earn real money I don't have to ask my parents for. At last! I've worked out that I could probably handle as many as four dogs at a time. If I take them out just on school days I could earn 200 euros a week for five hours' work and have the weekends free to shop and spend it. It's going to be brilliant.I should have asked Stephanie what kind of dog it was. I eyeballed a Great Dane warily, my face about level with its. Bloody hell it was huge. Size of a pony. Wasn't sure whether I was expected to walk it or stick a saddle on its back and ride the thing.”
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