Randy Sutton

“I couldn't bring this sorrow home. Couldn't tell my wife. Wouldn't tell my children. As my friend Edward Dee says, we live in the worst twenty minutes of someone else's life. So I leave it behind . . . where it happened . . . where it belongs . . . not in my house.”

“As I made my way out of the apartment and got in my patrol car I realized that it wasn't too late to stop myself from getting hardened and losing my sense of compassion. It dawned on me that it had been almost two years--almost to the very day--that I had been sworn in as a police officer. And over the last two years, I had seen lots of situations, many of them with tragic outcomes. I had been made completely aware of the degrees to which people would go to get revenge, to get high, to get laid, to get off easy and to get away with something--even to the point of telling outrageous lies about my own conduct.”

“A moment later I noticed that life around me had gone on as if nothing out of the ordinary had ever occurred. Motorists drove by as usual honking their horns needlessly, brakes screeching, tires squealing; pedestrians maneuvered for an opportunity to dart across traffic. i noticed lawn mowers buzzing in the distance--all this was evidence of the perpetual and sobering reality of life. It goes on no matter who lives or dies. It was time to find my partner.”

“Police officers put up barbed wire around their hearts to protect them.”

“We needed every detail of the crimes to get him charged; I had to walk him through them. I was like a tourist visiting Hell. I tried to memorize his words, retain all the details of the crimes, while at the same time warding off visions of the events. It was like watching a movie with my eyes closed.”

“Sometme later that afternoon I met a friend who was covered in gray dust and limping. I noticed he had a few small cuts on his hands, too. I asked him if he was okay and he said, "I'm walking and talking . . . I'm not bitching about anything." In retrospect, that seemed to sum up the attitude of people at Ground Zero who survived when the buildings collapsed. They might have some injuries but they had perspective.”