Roald Dahl

“If she's a lady, I'm a vernicious knid. (Eddie Albert in Willy Wanka and the Chocolate Factory)”

“A girl should think about making herself look attractive so she can get a good husband later on. Looks is more important than books, Miss Hunky...""The name is Honey," Miss Honey said."Now look at me," Mrs Wormwood said. "Then look at you. You chose books. I chose looks.”

“In any event, parents never underestimated the abilities of their own children. Quite the reverse. Sometimes it was well nigh impossible for a teacher to convince the proud father or mother that their beloved offspring was a complete nitwit.”

“It was slowly beginning to dawn upon Henry that nothing is any fun if you can get as much of it as you want. Especially money.”

“Meanings is not important, said the BFG. I cannot be right all the time. Quite often I is left instead of right.”

“When writing about oneself, one must strive to be truthful. Truth is more important than modesty.”

“Having power is not nearly as important as what you choose to do with it.”

“Hey!' Bruno called out 'Give me the rest of that banana I was eating.”

“Rainbow drops - suck them and you can spit in six different colours.”

“There is no life I know to compare with pure imagination. Living there, you'll be free if you truly wish to be.”

“And it was then I began to realize for the first time that there are two distinct sides to a writer of fiction. First, there is the side he displays to the public, that of an ordinary person like anyone else, a person who does ordinary things and speaks ordinary language. Second, there is the secret side, which comes out in him only after he has closed the door of his workroom and is completely alone. It is then that he slips into another world altogether, a world where his imagination takes over and he finds himself actually living in the places he is writing about at that moment. I myself, if you want to know, fall into a kind of trance, and everything around me disappears. I see only the point of my pencil moving over the paper, and quite often two hours go by as though they were a couple of seconds.”

“For me, the pleasure of writing comes with inventing stories.”

“...the more risks you allow children to take, the better they learn to take care of themselves. If you never let them take any risks, then I believe they become very prone to injury. Boys should be allowed to climb tall trees and walk along the tops of high walls and dive into the sea from high rocks... The same with girls. I like the type of child who takes risks. Better by far than the one who never does so.”

“I like enthusiasts of any kind.”

“...there are no secrets unless you keep them to yourself, and this was the greatest secret I had ever had to keep in my life so far.”

“When you're writing, it's rather like going on a very long walk”

“EATABLE MARSHMALLOW PILLOWS LICKABLE WALLPAPER FOR NURSERIES HOT ICE CREAMS FOR COLD DAYS COWS THAT GIVE CHOCOLATE MILK FIZZY LIFTING DRINKS SQUARE SWEETS THAT LOOK ROUND”

“I am the maker of music, the dreamer of dreams!”

“You is getting nosier than a parker.”

“You ignorant little slug!" the Trunchbull bellowed. "You witless weed! You empty-headed hamster! You stupid glob of glue!”

“A whizzpopper!" cried the BFG, beaming at her. "Us giants is making whizzpoppers all the time! Whizzpopping is a sign of happiness. It is music in our ears! You surely is not telling me that a little whizzpopping if forbidden among human beans?”

“Hooray!" said the Chief of the Army. "Let's blow everyone up! Bang-bang! Bang-bang!”

“If the Good Lord intended for us to walk, he wouldn't have invented rollar skates.”

“If you have good thoughts they will shine out of your face like sunbeams and you will always look lovely.”

“Bunkum and tummyrot! You'll never get anywhere if you go about what-iffing like that. Would Columbus have discovered America if he'd said 'What if I sink on the way over? What if I meet pirates? What if I never come back?' He wouldn't even have started.”

“We have tears in our eyesAs we wave our goodbyes,We so loved being with you, we three.So do please now and thenCome and see us again,The Giraffe and the Pelly and me."All you do is to lookAt a page in this bookBecause that’s where we always will be.No book ever endsWhen it’s full of your friendsThe Giraffe and the Pelly and me.”

“The maid screamed.The Queen gasped.Sophie waved.”

“Matilda said, "Never do anything by halves if you want to get away with it. Be outrageous. Go the whole hog. Make sure everything you do is so completely crazy it's unbelievable...”

“Both Matilda and Lavender were enthralled. It was quite clear to them that they were at this moment standing in the presence of a master. Here was somebody who had brought the art of skulduggery to the highest point of perfection, somebody, moreover, who was willing to risk life and limb in pursuit of her calling. They gazed in wonder at this goddess, and suddenly even the boil on her nose was no longer a blemish but a badge of courage.”

“... and when he put his mind to it, he could make his words coil themselves around and around the listener until they held her in some sort of a mild hypnotic spell.”

“What a fortunate fellow I am, I kept telling myself. Nobody has ever had such a lovely time as this!”

“Grown ups are complicated creatures, full of quirks and secrets.”

“If a person has ugly thoughts, it begins to show on the face. And when that person has ugly thoughts every day, every week, every year, the face gets uglier and uglier until you can hardly bear to look at it.A person who has good thoughts cannot ever be ugly. You can have a wonky nose and a crooked mouth and a double chin and stick-out teeth, but if you have good thoughts it will shine out of your face like sunbeams and you will always look lovely.”

“Ik heb gemerkt, juffrouw Engel, in mijn lange loopbaan in het onderwijs, dat een rotmeisje veel gevaarlijker is dan een rotjongen. Bovendien zijn ze veel moeilijker klein te krijgen. Een rotmeisje te grazen nemen is als achter een bromvlieg aan zitten. Je mept erop en het gore kreng is alweer weg. Rotmormeld, die meisjes.”

“We are the music makers, and we are the dreamers of dreams.”

“Mr Willy Wonka can make marshmallows that taste of violets, and rich caramels that change colour every ten seconds as you suck them, and little feathery sweets that melt away deliciously the moment you put them between your lips. He can make chewing-gum that never loses its taste, and sugar balloons that you can blow up to enormous sizes before you pop them with a pin and gobble them up. And, by a most secret method, he can make lovely blue birds' eggs with black spots on them, and when you put one of these in your mouth, it gradually gets smaller and smaller until suddenly there is nothing left except a tiny little DARKRED sugary baby bird sitting on the tip of your tongue.”

“Those who don't believe in magic will never find it.”

“La vita di uno scrittore è un vero inferno, confrontata a quella di un uomo d’affari. Lo scrittore deve forzarsi a lavorare, deve imporsi un proprio orario e, se non gli va di sedersi alla scrivania, nessuno lo rimprovera. Se è un romanziere, vive nel terrore: ogni nuovo giorno esige nuove idee, e non si è mai certi che arriveranno puntuali.Dopo due ore passate si sente completamente svuotato. Durante quelle due ore s’è trovato mille miglia lontano, in un altro luogo, in compagnia di gente totalmente diversa, e lo sforzo che deve fare per tornare indietro a nuoto, nel presente, è assai grande. E’ quasi un trauma. […] Bisogna essere pazzi per fare gli scrittori.La loro sola compensazione è un’assoluta libertà. Il loro unico padrone è la loro anima ed è per questo che hanno fatto quella scelta, ne sono certo.”

“Now that I am alone, I don't have to hide it; I don't have to hide anything any longer. I can let my face go because no one can see me; because there's twenty-one thousand feet between me and them... No, I don't have to press my teeth together or tighten the muscles of my jaw...”

“Two wrongs don't make a right.”

“One of the vital things for a writer who’s writing a book, which is a lengthy project and is going to take about a year, is how to keep the momentum going. It is the same with a young person writing an essay. They have got to write four or five or six pages. But when you are writing it for a year, you go away and you have to come back. I never come back to a blank page; I always finish about halfway through. To be confronted with a blank page is not very nice. But Hemingway, a great American writer, taught me the finest trick when you are doing a long book, which is, he simply said in his own words, “When you are going good, stop writing.” And that means that if everything’s going well and you know exactly where the end of the chapter’s going to go and you know just what the people are going to do, you don’t go on writing and writing until you come to the end of it, because when you do, then you say, well, where am I going to go next? And you get up and you walk away and you don’t want to come back because you don’t know where you want to go. But if you stop when you are going good, as Hemingway said…then you know what you are going to say next. You make yourself stop, put your pencil down and everything, and you walk away. And you can’t wait to get back because you know what you want to say next and that’s lovely and you have to try and do that. Every time, every day all the way through the year. If you stop when you are stuck, then you are in trouble!”

“Of course they're real people. They're Oompa-Loompas...Imported direct from Loompaland...And oh what a terrible country it is! Nothing but thick jungles infested by the most dangerous beasts in the world - hornswogglers and snozzwangers and those terrible wicked whangdoodles. A whangdoodle would eat ten Oompa-Loompas for breakfast and come galloping back for a second helping.”

“I understand what you're saying, and your comments are valuable, but I'm gonna ignore your advice.”

“Badger: The cuss you are.Mr. Fox: The cuss am I? Are you cussing with me?”

“A person who has good thoughts cannot ever be ugly. You can have a wonky nose and a crooked mouth and a double chin and stick-out teeth, but if you have good thoughts they will shine out of your face like sunbeams and you will always look lovely.”

“But there was one other thing that the grown-ups also knew, and it was this: that however small the chance might be of striking lucky, the chance is there. The chance had to be there.”

“When you're writing a book, it's rather like going on a very long walk, across valleys and mountains and things, and you get the first view of what you see and you write it down. Then you walk a bit further, maybe up onto the top of a hill, and you see something else. Then you write that and you go on like that, day after day, getting different views of the same landscape really. The highest mountain on the walk is obviously the end of the book, because it's got to be the best view of all, when everything comes together and you can look back and see that everything you've done all ties up. But it's a very, very long, slow process.”

“A little magic can take you a long way.”

“I began to realize how important it was to be an enthusiast in life. He taught me that if you are interested in something, no matter what it is, go at it at full speed ahead. Embrace it with both arms, hug it, love it and above all become passionate about it. Lukewarm is no good. Hot is no good either. White hot and passionate is the only thing to be.”

“A BOOK?! WHAT D'YOU WANNA FLAMING BOOK FOR?...WE'VE GOT A LOVELY TELLY WITH A 12-INCH SCREEN AND NOW YA WANNA BOOK!”