Sharon Ashwood

“She reached down and picked up one of the stakes she'd dropped, running the tip along her thigh as she straightened. "Want to play hunter and vampire?"Reynard quirked his eyebrow. "Madam, I came equipped with my own stake.""Whoa! Points to the old guy.”

“He'd heard about Holly putting some magical whammy on him, bringing to life the legend of the Chosen that gave a vampire the power to exist on sexual energy rather than blood. Forced to have sex on a regular basis. Doctor's orders. Lucky bastard.”

“And-he was ashamed to admit--he had been known to carry off the occasional roll of duct tape. That stuff could be used for everything.”

“I am old, not senile,”

“You met over a pile of dead bodies mere days ago. Now he's carving little radish garnishes and humming to himself. It's creepy.”

“Being the evil undead wasn't fun anymore. For one thing, it was increasingly hard to get a library card.”

“Rebels are simply oppressed individuals demanding their rights.”

“... vampires are like gourmet chocolate - oh, so tempting, but overindulgence is a killer.”

“Do you think city hall would take battling dragons as a excuse to waive a fine?”