Sherrilyn Kenyon

“And if wishes were horses, I’d have been run over in childhood.”

“People destroy beauty when they find it. (Acheron)How so? (Artemis)By nature, people are petty and jealous. They envy what they lack and because they don’t know how to acquire something, they try to destroy anyone who has it. Beauty is one of those things they hate most in others. (Acheron)”

“Are you mad? (Artemis)Yes, I am. Mad at this world where we are nothing to the gods. Mad at the Fates who put us here for no purpose except to toy with us for their petty amusement. I wish all of the gods were dead and gone. (Acheron)”

“I defy you to try it, Princess. Go ahead. I don’t even know how to sweep a floor. All I know how to do is use my body to please others. I was sick and alone with no references, friends, family, or money. I was so weak from hunger that even a beggar stole your himation from me while I lay on the ground, wanting to die and unable to stop him from taking it. So don’t come here now with your disdainful eyes and look at me like I’m beneath you. I don’t need your charity and I don’t need your pity. I know exactly what you see when you look at me. (Acheron)”

“A word of wisdom to you, akribos, you need to learn to accept gifts. (Catera)There’s no such thing as a gift. If I were to take that from you, sooner or later you would ask a favor from me in return. Nothing in life is ever truly given without expectation. (Acheron)”

“He deserves nothing. Nothing but our scorn. (Father)Then I am rich indeed from the abundance of that which you’ve shown me. (Acheron)”

“Then he will be called Acheron for the River of Woe. Like the river of the Underworld, his journey shall be dark, long and enduring. He will be able to give life and to take it. He will walk through his life alone and abandoned – ever seeking kindness and ever finding cruelty. May the gods have mercy on you, little one. No one else ever will. (Oracle)”

“You will fail and I’ll dance on your grave. (Apollymi)”

“So help me, I won’t rest until I bathe in your entrails! (Apollymi)”

“Even if I were lying on the sun itself, I would be freezing there without you. (Zarek)”

“You’re not a morning person, are you? (Simone)I’m a Dream-Hunter/demon. By my very nature I’m nocturnal. That big yellow ball in the sky offends me to the very core of my being. (Xypher)”

“Want a closer look? (Tate)Like a screwdriver through my eye socket. Sure, let’s have a look-see. (Simone)Ooo, welcome back, Ms. Snark. I’ve missed you. (Tate)”

“Charonte are guarding a Dimme? Is the world coming to an end and I missed the memo? (Stryker)”

“And now we’re being assaulted by the gallu. May they all burn and perish in the ashes of a dragon’s scaly ass! (Tyris)”

“Simone’s mother was an unfortunate mistake. Palackas, Simone’s father, was a bound demon who stumbled across her one night while he was carrying out an order for his master. One thing led to another…he inserted part A into slot B, and he fell in love with her... (Jaden)”

“Right, and the definition of basic stupidity is to keep doing the same thing over and over again while expecting a different result. I’m not stupid. (Xypher)I didn’t say to keep doing it. Move forward with purpose. Examine what went wrong and correct that one mistake. (Acheron)”

“Thinking of someone else is what got me damned. It’s a mistake I don’t want to repeat. (Xypher)You know sometimes it’s by repeating our mistakes that we realize what went wrong the first time. Knowing that, we’re able to fix the mistake and move past it. (Acheron)”

“Relax, she’s not really converting. (Acheron)Look at her! She’s not exactly baking cookies! (Xypher)”

“Don’t play that game with me, Acheron. Tell me what I need to know! (Xypher)Nice tone. We should rent you out to record Halloween albums. (Acheron)”

“Ironically no one ever wants to hear what I have to say about anything. They usually argue with me to the point I want to put them through a wall. Hopefully you won’t be so dense. (Acheron)”

“Holy crud! (Simone)”

“Kaiaphas. I see you finally made some friends. You must have learned to use a toothbrush at last. You know it’s the whole up and down, back and forth that confuses people…or demons. (Xypher)”

“This one’s easy to use. The pointy end goes into their body. (Liza)”

“Maybe they’re customers. (Simone)For a doll store? Yes, I can just see them now…I’ll take the frilly pink baby doll. (Liza)”

“He walks in daylight. But, like a demon, he’s weaker then. He seems to have the powers of a god, but no followers. What would you call him? (Xypher)I wouldn’t call him anything that didn’t make him deliriously happy. (Simone)”

“Lady, right now you could tell me to throw myself under a bus to make you happy, and I’d oblige you. (Xypher)”

“I know you’re going to find this hard to believe, but for some reason I don’t understand, I actually like you…most of the time. (Simone)Well, you also love Jesse. Obviously your taste in men leaves a lot to be desired. (Xypher)”

“Are you okay? (Simone)No, I’m in ecstasy. I blew straight past okay the minute you touched me. (Xypher)”

“Yeah, right. I don’t believe that one for a minute. What do you think? I fell off a turnip truck? (Simone)Honestly? All I was thinking about was how beautiful you are. How much I wanted to feel your skin against mine and how I’ve never been this attracted to a woman before. (Xypher)”

“I am about to impart to you the sacred words my father gave to me. It’s the five responses that will get you out of any female problem…I don’t know what you’re talking about. I didn’t do it. Baby, there’s no one else in my world but you. Oops. And Jesus is Lord. Not to mention you can combine them. Such as – I don’t know what you’re talking about, I didn’t do it, or Jesus is Lord, baby, you know there’s no one else in my world but you. (Jesse)(Simone opens the bathroom door.)Oops, Jesus is Lord. (Xypher)”

“Stay out there! Don’t you dare come back in here with those evil mind tricks! (Simone)Does it buy me any bonus points to note that you have a really nice looking ass? (Xypher)”

“I didn’t know I could do that. I mean I knew I could do that before, but I didn’t know it was actually working now until you screamed. I thought I was just imagining it. And don’t give me that look…sorry? (Xypher)”

“Your father wasn’t a positive influence on you, was he? (Simone)Being the god of nightmares, he wasn’t a warm fuzzy bunny. Unless you count Happy Bunny. Amazingly the two of them have a lot in common…And I have to say that I’ve developed a fondness for that pissy rodent. (Xypher)”

“How do you know about Boy George? (Jesse)I was in hell, Jesse. What do you think they used to torture me with? Bad pop songs. (Xypher)”

“Someone please tell me that we’re not seriously having a friggin’ debate over the genius of ‘Karma Chameleon’ at seven o’clock in the morning? (Xypher)”

“It’s a brilliant song! C’mon…’Every day is like survival. You’re my lover, not my rival.’ What could be more meaningful than that? (Jesse)”

“If I hear ‘Karma Chameleon’ one more time, I swear I’m going to find Boy George and make him eat Jesse’s record. What does red, gold, and green have to do with anything anyway? (Gloria)”

“My father used to say that life is what you make it. Today is the first day of the rest of your life. You can’t change the past, but the future isn’t set in stone. You can effect a change there. Move forward not with hatred or love. Move forward with purpose. (Simone)”

“What made you so unforgiving? (Simone)Be grateful that you have the luxury of asking me that question. Pray to whatever god you worship that you’ll always be ignorant. (Xypher)”

“Start walking. When you hit a spot where you’re gasping for breath, that should tell us our limitations. (Xypher)Oh, joy. I can’t wait to be the guppy. (Simone)Glub, glub, little fishy. Start walking. (Xypher)”

“Yeah, but you’re both offending me with all this love-dovey crap. Get a room. No wait, don’t. Separate rooms. Both of you! (Jesse)”

“Hey, Vader, keep your Jedi mind tricks to yourself. That hurt! (Jesse)”

“Did you do that? (Simone)Sometimes my powers work. Sometimes they don’t. Looks like this time they did. Yea, us. (Xypher)”

“Speaking of, her family is due in any minute to claim her body. What am I supposed to tell them when we can’t give the body over? Again, I don’t think ‘oops’ will quite cover it. (Tate)”

“I’m getting all warm and fuzzy inside at the prospect of these demon things roaming the street, preying on us. (Tate)”

“They’re ogling you, dude. Talking about your assets and the fact that you’re nauseatingly ripped, which I would have been had I not bit the dust at seventeen. I’m forever trapped in my tall, gangly phase. (Jesse)”

“Do you know what happened to the last person who took that tone with me? (Xypher)Let me guess…Disembowelment. Probably painful. Definitely slow. (Simone)”

“While I respect suicidal tendencies on most days, you’d do well to remember who you’re addressing and, more to the point, what I can do to you. No one says you have to go back to Tartarus in one piece. (Acheron)”

“I beg your pardon. I’m not gross. (Simone)Grody to the max. Gag me with a spoon. I’ve seen you in the mornings. You’re not exactly well coiffed. (Jesse)”

“Ectoplasmic plane? What the devil is that? (Simone)It’s jargon from those of us who are corporeally challenged. It’s the great beyond where we bounce into each other like floundering atoms. It’s really kind of gross – which is why I hang out with you. But only because you’re less gross than they are. (Jesse)”