Zathyn Priest
Zathyn Priest is an Australian writer with severe vampiric tendencies. Absolutely convinced the sun could turn him to a pile of ash, Zathyn prefers to write under the cover of darkness. This serves two purposes, with the first being the afore mentioned sunlight danger, and the second being the fact that nighttime means no annoying phones ringing or people knocking at the door.
Zathyn has written three published novels using this strange moonlight technique. The Curtis Reincarnation, which is now available in paperback. The Slayer’s Apprentice, soon to be available in paperback. And, Liquid Glass, soon to be available from Torquere Press. He has also written two short fiction works. Left of Center, available from Torquere Press, and One of Those Days, an eBook downloadable from www.zathynpriest.com - because even though Zathyn has vampiric traits, he’s actually quite a nice guy and wrote One of Those Days as a freebie.
When Zathyn isn’t writing, or running for cover before sunlight turns him to cinders, he likes to pretend he’s really good at playing his MIDI keyboard. Thankfully, Zathyn is a conscientious neighbour. Rather than drive the street insane with repeated renditions of Greensleeves, he uses headphones because, let’s face it, no matter how beautiful Greensleeves is, most people don’t want to hear it one hundred times a night.
Zathyn lives with a retired greyhound called Chrissy, who lives the life of luxury sleeping away most of her days on the sofa and generally only waking up when there’s food around or if it’s time for a walk. There’s also a cat called Fran, who doesn’t like Chrissy very much and feels she should reiterate this fact by occasionally smacking her in the face. Just when you thought the household couldn’t get any stranger, there’s a duck - or drake, he’d probably rather be called - named Charlie who originally lived on a farm, but moved in with Zathyn after a fox ate all his girlfriends and was eying Charlie for dessert.
“Sure enough the goldfish was swimming upside down, its boggle eyes wide and staring, its fins flapping madly at its sides. Brandon felt like the fish looked. He was anxious over how Lewis knew he was a vet and the address of the practice he worked at."I don't think it has vertigo, Lewis." A professional approach was all he could think of. "Has it ever done this before?""He. He's not an 'it' and his name is Fluffles. I'd appreciate it if you referred to Fluffles by his name rather than a generic term demeaning him into nothing more than an object devoid of gender." Lewis cocked his head, staring unblinking. "Fluffles is a beloved pet. I demand you show him respect!""Ooookaaaay." Brandon pressed his lips together and released them with a loud pop. "Has Fluffles ever done this before?""Don't know." Lewis peered into the bag. "I've only had him forty-five minutes.”
“What you’re saying is this spider, with a brain the size of strawberry seed, hid in your car with its face covered to avoid being gassed by insect spray.” He stood in front of me, laughing, peering down into my eyes. “And then, when the fumes dispersed, he set about plotting revenge. Once he’d come up with his plan, he exited your car and, even though he didn’t see which direction you went in, he found the front door because he knew you were inside this house.” Biting down on his bottom lip, Ric smirked. “Don’t you think, if he was as smart as all that, he’d have worn a mask before he ran out from under visor so you couldn’t recognise him on your doormat?”
“She scrambled into a sitting position, but her legs remained where they were. “Really? You mean like back stage and stuff?” “Uh-huh. Close your knees I’m seeing too much.” She brought her knees together quickly. “Why are you looking?” “Hard to miss when you’re sitting there like you’re giving birth!”
“Despite his awkwardness Alec couldn’t deny it felt good to be in receipt of spoiling. “I’m buying our house, no arguments. Something understated, like a castle with a moat and a speedboat so you can get to the front door quickly!”
“You’ve been working hard, a sandwich isn’t enough. I’ll make you dinner.” From the freezer she took out a TV meal and threw it in the microwave.”
“Get off my bed before you make it smell like girl germs.”
“Alec encapsulated the word genius in every conceivable sense. Frank knew it. He'd always known it. He'd never learned that true genius couldn't be caged because true genius could never be contained.”
“I love you. You're my voice of reason.”
“Thank you, baby, for being my rock, my safe place to land, my inspiration, and my heart. No matter what, snaring you as a husband will always remain my greatest achievement. I love you.”
“Why are all gay men understanding and compassionate?” “Pfft.” I arced an eyebrow at her. “They're not, trust me. Its a myth.” “A straight man wouldn't understand cramps, mood swings, backaches, not to mention the price of tampons...”
“Is he about to kiss me? Did he eat garlic too or was I the only one? 'Cause if Ric didn't eat garlic then my breath's gonna stink and he'll think... Oh for fuck sake, shut up internal dialogue!”
“Do you prefer to be called Richard or Dick?” “Ric.” “Dick? I'll make a note of that on your file.” I spoke aloud as I wrote. “Patient prefers to be called Dick.”
“What do you put in that coffee? Two teaspoons of bitch powder?”
“Had your eyes tested?” “Yeah. My vision’s fine. They’ve done brain scans, too.” “Did they find anything?” “Nothing.” “Why doesn’t that surprise me?”
“Oh, Cameron," Eldon replied in a whisper, moving closer and brushing his lips over Cameron's mouth. "You are literally the very reason my heart beats. Nothing I have lost can compare with the love in you I have found.”
“Cylindrical peg into the round hole. It's not that hard. Actually, yes it was that hard, which is why I didn't want it deflating before he figured out what to do with it.”