41 Inspiring And Funny Cat Quotes

Cats have an enchanting way of capturing our hearts and imaginations, often leaving us both inspired and amused. Whether they're elegantly perched atop a windowsill or comically tangled in yarn, these feline companions have sparked countless memorable musings over the years. In this collection, we've gathered 41 of the most inspiring and amusing cat quotes that celebrate the quirks and charm of our whiskered friends. Join us on a delightful journey through words that capture the essence of what it means to share our lives with these enigmatic creatures.

1. “Never try to outstubborn a cat.” - Robert A. Heinlein

2. “There is love enough in this world for everybody, if people will just look.” - Kurt Vonnegut

3. “I resisted the urge to hurl my plate at him. “Of course not, Ian. It’s just that normally at this hour, Bones and I are fucking like rabbits, so I get twitchy when I have to wait for him to climb aboard.” - Jeaniene Frost

4. “Cats are the lap-dancers of the animal world. Soon as you stop shelling out, they move on, find another lap. They're furry little sociopaths. Pretty and slick -- in love with themselves. When's the last time you saw a seeing-eye cat?” - Andrew Vachss

5. “Out last chance is a cat's magic sight. We are doomed.” - Laurell K. Hamilton

6. “Grimalkin yawned and licked his whiskers. 'Not dead,' he replied. 'Hardly dead. But she changed her name and appearance so many times, even the oldest fey would hardly remember her. She likes to keep a low profile, you know.' Puck frowned, knitting his bows together. 'Then how is it you remember her?' he demanded, sounding indignant. 'I am a cat,' purred Grimalkin.” - Julie Kagawa

7. “how can you love a little catso muchin such ashortshorttime?” - Sharon Creech

8. “Look," I whisper to Cat, "Shooting star! That's good luck."She rolls her eyes. "It's a plane, you idiot," she says, and when I look again I can see that she's right. Typical.” - Cathy Cassidy

9. “It's a small world." . . . "When you put it in a cemetery it is.” - Kurt Vonnegut

10. “In this world, you get what you pay for.” - Kurt Vonnegut

11. “The gremlin stopped, blinking up at me with an almost hurt expression. 'Master punish bad kitty?' he said in a pitiful voice.'No I'm not going to punish the bad kitty,' I said and Grimalkin snorted.'And you aren't either. I want to talk to you. Will you stay and not run off if we let you go?'He bobbed his head, as best as he could while his ears were gripped tightly by Puck. 'Master wants Razor stay, Razor stay. Not move until told. Promise.” - Julie Kagawa

12. “Bones didn’t share any of my qualms about suddenly holding an arm that wasn’t attached to a body anymore. He just grabbed the ghoul by his other arm and began thumping him over the head with the loose limb. I’d heard Bones threaten to beat someone with their own limb before, but I’d always assumed that was a figure of speech. Apparently not.” - Jeaniene Frost

13. “I think this’ll definitely tide me over while we’re apart,”Bones laughed, dragging me into his arms with far more strength and quickness than was fair, considering I still had trouble making my limbs operate.“Oh, Kitten,” he murmured as his lips dragged down my throat. “You didn’t really think we were done, did you?” - Jeaniene Frost

14. “There's nothing to catch up on. You came, you saw, you scored, you left. End of story.” - Jeaniene Frost

15. “We're, ah, taking a break to evaluate things, and, um, reexamine our relationship, so I stuffed him in a closet!" I burst out in shame. Timmie's eyes goggled.Is he still there?” - Jeaniene Frost

16. “Imprinting."I heard the smile disappear from Cat's face. "Next."I repeated myself."Are you referring to Stephenie Meyer's books?""Yes," I said. A little unwillingly.Cat chuckled. "There's no shame in reading enjoyable books. But this topic is better discussed later.""Got it.” - Shannon Delany

17. “You can shove a cat in an oven, but that doesn't make it a biscuit.” - Matt Lewis

18. “My father was English. He date-raped my mother so she's hated English men ever since. You know my boyfriend's English, and I'm, uh, I'm half-English, which she's never been real happy about. If she finds out I'm dating someone English, she'll ah, think I' turning my back on her and becoming a foreigner.'Cathy, that's the stupidest reason I've ever heard.” - Jeaniene Frost

19. “A meow massages the heart.” - Stuart McMillan

20. “I know I'm a bad bargain. But I'm begging you to have me anyway. Because I want a chance to make you as happy as you make me. I want to build a life with you."He fought to steady his voice. "Please come to me, Cat, because there's no surviving you. You don't have to love me back. You don't have to be mine. Just let me be yours.” - Lisa Kleypas

21. “A black cat crossed my path, and I stopped to dance around it widdershins and to sing the rhyme,Ou va-ti mistigri?Passe sans faire de mai ici.” - Joanne Harris

22. “There are two means of refuge from the miseries of life: music and cats.” - Andrew Schweitzer

23. “For several centuries, the Celtic church of Ireland was spared the Greek dualism of matter and spirit. They regarded the world with the clear vision of faith. When a young Celtic monk saw his cat catch a salmon swimming in shallow water, he cried, "The power of the Lord is in the paw of the cat!” - Brennan Manning

24. “You once told me you could stand many things.” My voice was raspy from all the emotions battering against those well-honed inner defenses.“So can I. I can stand whatever Apollyon dishes out, can take the bigotry from others over what I am, the freaky ghost juju from Marie, all thecraziness my mother can throw at me, and even the pain of my uncle dying. But the one thing that I would never, ever recover from would be losingyou. You made me promise before to go on if that happened, but Bones”—here my words broke and tears spilled down my cheeks—“I wouldn’twant to.”He’d been near the side of the bed when I started talking, but was in my arms before the first tear fell. Very softly, his lips brushed over those wetstreaks, coming back pink from the drops still shimmering on them.“No matter what happens, you will never lose me,” he whispered. “I am forever yours, Kitten, in this life or the next.” - Jeaniene Frost

25. “How about I let you floss with my jugular as well?” - Jeaniene Frost

26. “If she had touched me," he said very softly, "I would have been hers and not my own, not ever again. I wanted her to touch me but I could not let her. No cat will. We let human beings caress us because it is pleasant enough and calms them - but not her. The price is more than a cat can pay.” - Peter S. Beagle

27. “Who knows what goes on in the mind of a cat?” - Julie Kagawa

28. “Even without being believed, magic can change things. It moves invisibly through the air, dissolving the usual ways of seeing, allowing new ways to creep in, secretly, quietly, like a stray cat sliding thought the bushes.” - Janet Taylor Lisle

29. “What have you done to my cat?" Magnus demanded... "You drank his blood, didn't you? You said you weren't hungry!"Simon was indignant. "I did not drink his blood. He's fine!" He poked the Chairman in the stomach. The cat yawned. "Second, you asked me if I was hungry when you were ordering pizza, so I said no, because I can't eat pizza. I was being polite.""That doesn't get you the right to eat my cat.""Your cat is fine!" Simon reached to pick up the tabby, who jumped indignantly to his feet and stalked off the table. "See?""Whatever.” - Cassandra Clare

30. “Will the real Red Reaper please stand up?” - Jeaniene Frost

31. “But—let me tell you my cat joke. It's very short and simple. A hostess is giving a dinner party and she's got a lovely five-pound T-bone steak sitting on the sideboard in the kitchen waiting to be cooked while she chats with the guests in the living room—has a few drinks and whatnot. But then she excuses herself to go into the kitchen to cook the steak—and it's gone. And there's the family cat, in the corner, sedately washing it's face.""The cat got the steak," Barney said."Did it? The guests are called in; they argue about it. The steak is gone, all five pounds of it; there sits the cat, looking well-fed and cheerful. "Weigh the cat," someone says. They've had a few drinks; it looks like a good idea. So they go into the bathroom and weigh the cat on the scales. It reads exactly five pounds. They all perceive this reading and a guest says, "okay, that's it. There's the steak." They're satisfied that they know what happened, now; they've got empirical proof. Then a qualm comes to one of them and he says, puzzled, "But where's the cat?” - Philip K. Dick

32. “I never hear about dear Mike. I wrote Ellen Greene and asked about him and she replyed and never mentioned Mike but told me all about her roomatism. As if I cared about her roomatism.” - Emily of New Moon

33. “Meg's face clouded, and I wondered if she was going to rain the way people do sometimes.” - Ray Rhamey

34. “Not fooling around, not bothering nobody, just sitting here mending the Primus," said the cat with a hostile frown, "and, moreover, I consider it my duty to warn you that the cat is an ancient, inviolable animal.” - Mikhail Bulgakov

35. “We have to leave!" I said to Vlad. "Now.""Run, Forest, run!" Vlad mocked."Stow it, Drac," I snapped” - Jeaniene Frost

36. “‎"What the hell was THAT?" I gasped."Premature inflamulation," he replied. "Happens sometimes. Very embarrassing, I don't like to talk about it."A snort of amusement came from my right. I swung in that direction to see Bones bestow the most approving look on Vlad he'd ever given him. Then his expression sobered as he met my gaze.” - Jeaniene Frost

37. “Spartacus," I called, "how's it hanging?" Probably not too well. Once you're dead, had your organs removed, and are resurrected as an undead mummified cat, your testicles probably looked like old raisins that had rolled under the couch. Raisins didn't tend to...hang.” - Rob Thurman

38. “Oh, yes, that feels so good," I moaned, and instead of punching Ian, pulled him closer.Breath tickled my neck as he laughed. "I know. I'm truly gifted.” - Jeaniene Frost

39. “Avendo perso uno degli inseguiti, Ivan concentrò la sua attenzione sul gatto, e vide quello strano animale avvicinarsi al predellino del vagone di testa del tram A immobile alla fermata, spingere via con insolenza una donna, afferrare la maniglia e tentare perfino di dare una moneta da dieci copeche alla bigliettaria attraverso un finestrino aperto per l'afa.Il comportamento del gatto sbalordì talmente Ivan da lasciarlo immobile davanti alla drogheria sull'angolo; e subito una seconda volta, ma con molta più forza egli fu sbalordito dal comportamento della bigliettaria. Questa, non appena vide il gatto che saliva sul tram, gridò con una rabbia che la scuoteva tutta:- È vietato ai gatti! È vietato portare gatti! Passa via! Scendi, se no chiamo la polizia!Né la bigliettaria né i passeggeri furono colpiti dalla cosa principale: non dal fatto che un gatto salisse sul tram, questo poteva ancora passare, ma dal fatto che volesse pagare il biglietto!Il gatto si dimostrò animale non soltanto solvibile, ma anche disciplinato. Alla prima sgridata della bigliettaria cessò l'attacco, si staccò dal predellino e si sedette alla fermata, soffregandosi i baffi con la monetina. Ma non appena la bigliettaria diede il segnale e il tram si mosse, il gatto si comportò come chiunque sia cacciato da un tram, sul quale deve viaggiare per forza. Dopo essersi lasciato passare davanti tutte e tre le vetture, balzò sulla parte posteriore dell'ultima, si afferrò con la zampa a un tubo che usciva dal veicolo e filò via, economizzando in tal modo il prezzo della corsa.” - Mikhail Bulgakov

40. “Colorful characters are the odd shaped pieces that fill the holes in life's puzzle.” - Richard Stephens

41. “My cat brought me a toy. I thanked her and threw it. She sat there gave me a look that made me realize people and dogs are the crazy ones.” - Dan Harmon