“It didn't mean forever but for right now I wanted Rush to be my first. He wouldn't be my last. A stop I might never forget or get over. That was what scared me the most. Not being able to move on.”

“Rush please," I begged, fighting the urge to grab his hand and force him to bring me relief from the throbbing underneath his touch "I need..." I didn't know what I needed. I just needed.Rush lifted his head and ran his nose up my neck then pressed a kiss to my chin."I know what you need. I'm just not sure I can handle watching you get it. You've got me all kinds of worked up, girl. I'm trying hard to be a good boy. I can't lose control in the back of damn car."I shook my head. He couldn't stop. I didn't want him to be good. I wanted him inside me. Now. "Please, don't be good. Please," I begged. Rush let out a rugged breath "Shit, baby. Stop it. I'm going to explode. I'll give you your release but when I finally bury myself inside you for the first time you won't be sprawled in the back of my car. You'll be in my bed."His hand moved before I could respond and my eyes rolled back in my head. "That's it. Come for me, sweet Blaire. Come on my hand and let me feel it. I want to watch you." His words sent me spiralling over the edge of the cliff I'd been trying so hard to reach."Ruuuuuush!" I heard the loud cry that came from me as i went falling into complete bliss. I knew I was crying for him, screaming out his name and maybe even clawing at him but I could no longer control myself. The ecstasy was too much.”

“Even if I had stayed she wouldn't have ever wanted me. She didn't want me for anything more than a summer fling. I was a way of moving on for her.”

“Dear Josh,Thank you for giving me the most amazing memories. My life growing up was so full because you were in it. Having your love and loving you was alwaysjust right. It made sense. You were my home. When I was with you I knew everything would be okay.You dried my tears for me when I was sad. You held my hand when we buried my mother. You made me laugh when the world seemed like it wasfalling apart. You were every special memory a girl could have. That first kiss will forever be embedded in my brain. It was as funny as it was sweet.Our life together molded me into the woman I’ve become. I understand what it feels like to be loved and cherished because I had that with you. Inever doubted my worth because you taught me I was worthy.When you said that one day I would heal I didn’t believe that was possible. Life couldn’t go one without my best friend. There was no room foranother guy in my heart. It turns out you were right. You always were. I found him. He is incredible. He is nothing at all like I would have planned. Hedoesn’t fit into a perfect package. He managed to wiggle into my heart and take over before I knew what was happening. I found that happiness you told mewould come along. I’m going to go live that life. I’m sure it will be a wilder ride than I ever imagined and I can’t wait to live it. He’s my home now. I’llalways love you. I’ll never forget you. But this is my goodbye. I wasn’t ready before to let you go. Now, I can move on. Your memory will live on in my heartalways.Love,Your Eva Blue”

“With you, things are different. I'm not sure what it is but when I'm with you, I feel something I've never felt before. I do want you. Bad. It surprises me and scares the shit out of me. Maybe I'm not good for you. Maybe what I feelis wrong. Because, I did love Ashton. She was all I needed...but never did I feel the uncontrollable desire to get her underneath me" His voice dropped, "Never did I make up reasons to get her to wrap her legs around me so I could feel her pressed up against me. Never," he swallowed hard. "Never, did I think about being inside her.”

“I dropped my phone on the floor and let the pain assail me. I'd given my heart away to someone who didn't want it. Even knowing that, I didn't regret it. I just wanted him to want me. I just wanted him to love me too.”

“I could never be what she wanted. She thought I was like Cage and the right girl could tame me. It wasn't about that. I didn't need taming. I needed fucking saving.”