“[on Springsteen's "Stolen Car":] A kind of mystical film noir, written by Kafka and shot by Polanski.”

“Friendship is ageless. It is the spirit we should like and care for, not the shell that encases it.”

“YOU have no room to laugh, that's all. I'm not doing any worse with Boovish than you did with English.'Get off of the car,' J.Lo huffed. 'I am an English superstar.'Uh-uh. There's no comparison. 'Gratuity' in written Boovish has seventeen different bubbles that all have to be the right size and in the right place. 'J.Lo' in written English only has three letters, and you still spelled it 'M-smiley face-pound sign.”

“[J.Lo] found us a police car. Sort of.'It's not a police car,' I said.'It is,' said J.Lo. 'Looknow. Lights for flashing.''That's true.''Writing on the sides.''Yeah, but the writing? It says ''BullShake Party Patrol.''Yes. Whatnow?”

“I scattered J.Lo's tools around the car, searching for some kind of rope, or something that could be used like a rope. I should have paid more attention to anything that looked like a pencil sharpener made of lemon Jell-O that, when cranked, would spit out superstrong yarn that smelled like ginger ale. I only mention this because J.Lo really did have such a thing.”

“Above the desk there was this framed picture of Jesus. He was reaching his hand out and making this face like he was about to get shot.”

“She's read every word I've written," he said. "That's the truest way to know someone's heart.”