“I'm hungry enough that I started to salivate at the sight of lettuce. I repeat: lettuce.”
“I have an apple that thinks its a pear. And a bun that thinks it’s a cat. And a lettuce that thinks its a lettuce.""It’s a clever lettuce, then.""Hardly," she said with a delicate snort. "Why would anything clever think it’s a lettuce?""Even if it is a lettuce?" I asked."Especially then," she said. "Bad enough to be a lettuce. How awful to think you are a lettuce too.”
“Lettuce is the Devil.”
“Lettuce is too Flat”
“If there are weeds in my garden, I have a problem. But it does not lead me to question the existence of lettuce.”
“Tacos.""Tacos?" I echoed.This seemed to amuse him. "Tomatoes, lettuce, cheese.""I know what a taco is!”