“If ever I hear again of any lapse from a proper standard of infantile decorum, I shall ask for your transference to a Sub-Centre–preferably to Iceland. Good morning.”

“I will not say, as the beggars at our door used to do, ‘I’ll never ask anything of Him again;’ but, on the contrary, ‘He shall hear oftener from me than ever,’ and I will love God the better, and love prayer the better, as long as I live.”

“Did you hear?" he asked. "They found another body around nine this morning. It's the Ripper, definitely.""Good morning," I replied."Morning. Listen to this. The second victim...”

“He remembered lesson #76.5 from Man Decorum 101: Never tell a smart, pissed-off female what to do. Ask her. Nicely. Preferably with roses in hand.”

“I shall pass through this life but once. Any good therefore that I can do, let me do it now for I shall never pass this way again.”

“I don't think your God has ever advised you otherwise. You hear only what you want. He only ever commands your preferences.”