“The dog has been esteemed and loved by all the people on earth and he has deserved this affection for he renders services that have made him man's best friend.”

“When a man's best friend is his dog, that dog has a problem.”

“The Almighty Lecturer, by displaying the principles of science in the structure of the universe, has invited man to study and to imitation. It is as if He has said to the inhabitants of this globe that we call ours, "I have made an earth for man to dwell upon, and I have rendered the starry heavens visible, to teach him science and the arts. He can now provide for his own comfort, and learn from my munificence to all to be kind to each other.”

“Satan has been the best friend the church has ever had, as he has kept it in business all these years!”

“Satan has certainly been the best friend the church has ever had, as he has kept it in business all these years.”

“You can usually tell that a man is good if he has a dog who loves him.”