“On Monday mornings I am dedicated to the proposition that all men are created jerks.”
“Personally, I never admired communists because they operate on the theory that human beings are nice people.”
“We believe in healthy, hearty laughter -- at the expense of the whole human race, if needs be. Needs be.”
“I refuse to think of them as chin hairs. I think of them as stray eyebrows.”
“Baseball is only dull to dull minds”
“The harder I practice, the luckier I get.”