“You left me like he left you.”

“I think how this is always the way he is, giving me something even when most would think there was nothing left to do but let go”

“To see how Grandfather handles leaving, and tosee how we manage being left.”

“I marked a map for every deathFor every ache and blowMy world was all a page of blackWith nothing left but snow.”

“They were too much to carryso I left them behindfor a new life, in a new placebut no one forgot who I was.”

“Thank you," I tell Xander. "I didn't get anything for you -""It's all right," he says, "but maybe - you could -"He looks into my eyes and I know what he wants. A kiss. Even thought he knows about Ky. Xander and I are still connected; this is still good-bye. I know already that that kiss would be sweet. It would be what he would hold on to, as I hold on to Ky's.But that's something I don't think I can give. "Xander -""It's all right," he was, and then he stands up. I do too, and he reaches for me, pulls me close.”

“I know you love me. I love you, I always will, but things can't hold like this. They have to break. You say you don't mind, that you will wait for me, but I think that you do mind, and you should. Because we've done too much waiting in our lives, Xander. Don't wait for me anymore. I hope for love for you.I hope for this more than anything else, maybe even more than my own happiness. And in a way, perhaps that means I love Xander best of all.”