“Laminated Lettuce ... perfect for holiday gift giving.”

“The journey of a thousand miles begins with a cash advance.”

“My advice: write down everything you eat. It's amazing what that "self honesty" can do for you. (Do you really want to have to confess that doughnut? I thought not.) ”

“We are fat and sick and dying because we have handed a basic, fundamental and intimate function of life over to corporations. We choose to value our nourishment so little that we entrust it to strangers. This is insanity. Feed yourselves. Feed your loved ones. And for God's sake feed your children.”

“The moral of this story is not everything that's slick is non-stick, and not everything non-stick is slick.”

“I wish the rose was as beautiful as the woman who gives it as a gift...but to say so would be to lie. But I will accept the lesser if it pleases the greater of the two...and I say, THANK YOU”

“The real questions for parents should be: "Are you engaged? Are you paying attention?" If so, plan to make lots of mistakes and bad decisions. Imperfect parenting moments turn into gifts as our children watch us try to figure out what went wrong and how we can do better next time. The mandate is not to be perfect and raise happy children. Perfection doesn't exist, and I've found what makes children happy doesn't always prepare them to be courageous, engaged adults.”