“BELLADONNA, n. In Italian a beautiful lady; in English a deadly poison. A striking example of the essential identity of the two tongues.”

“Marriage, n.: The state or condition of a community consisting of a master, a mistress and two slaves, making in all, two.”

“Clarinet n. An instrument of torture operated by a person with cotton in his ears. There are two instruments worse than a clarinet – two clarinets.”

“Ocean, n. A body of water occupying about two-thirds of a world made for man — who has no gills.”

“Academe, n.: An ancient school where morality and philosophy were taught. Academy, n.: A modern school where football is taught.”

“Learning, n. The kind of ignorance distinguishing the studious.”

“DISOBEDIENCE, n. The silver lining to the cloud of servitude.”