“Beware of the compound adjective, beloved of the tyro and the 'poetess'.”

“Age - That period of life in which we compound for the vices that remain by reviling those we have no longer the vigor to commit.”

“Hippogriff, n. An animal (now extinct) which was half horse and half griffin. The griffin was itself a compound creature, half lion and half eagle. The hippogriff was actually, therefore, only one-quarter eagle, which is two dollars and fifty cents in gold. The study of zoology is full of surprises.”

“Acquaintance: "A person whom we know well enough to borrow from, but not well enough to lend to. A degree of friendship called slight when its object is poor or obscure, and intimate when he is rich or famous.”

“Immortality: A toy which people cry for, And on their knees apply for, Dispute, contend and lie for, And if allowed Would be right proud Eternally to die for.”

“HAND, n. A singular instrument worn at the end of the human arm and commonly thrust into somebody's pocket.”

“Speak when you are angry and you will make the best speech you will ever regret.”