“Self-evident, adj. Evident to one's self and to nobody else.”

“Positive, adj.: Mistaken at the top of one's voice.”

“Faith, n. Belief without evidence in what is told by one who speaks without knowledge, of things without parallel.”

“The fact that boys are allowed to exist at all is evidence of a remarkable Christian forbearance among men.”

“Hash, x. There is no definition for this word - nobody knows what hash is.Famous, adj. Conspicuously miserable.Dictionary, n. A malevolent literary device for cramping the growth of a language and making it hard and inelastic. This dictionary, however, is a most useful work.”

“TRUTHFUL, adj. Dumb and illiterate.”

“Selfish, adj. Devoid of consideration for the selfishness of others.”