“Sorry I'm not your boyfriend. And I mean that in all sorts of ways.”

“I'm sorry I have issues with my boyfriend doing other men. I'm sorry I have issues with me doing other men. Why was I always being made to feel guilty because I wasn't having sex with more people? Wasn't it supposed to be the other way around?”

“If you were expecting Prince Charming, I'm sorry. He's with his boyfriend.”

“I know, I'm sorry, "Bailey says. "What does exsanguinated mean?" The girl smiles. "It means draining all your blood," she says. "But they don't actually do that, I don't think.”

“Oh, I'm sorry. Did I interrupt some sort of dominance foreplay?”

“Ethan and I are done," I said finally."I'm sorry.""He was my first boyfriend.""I know.""The only real boyfriend I've had. I'm a senior in high school and he was my only real boyfriend.""I know.""And I won't find another one at Jones Hall. That is guaranteed.""Okay.""This is all very sad and tragic," I said.Alan unwrapped a sleeve of Smarties. "Yet, oddly, you don't seem that upset.""I know.”