“When was the last time you were with a man? In the Biblical sense.""I thought the Bible frowned on that."That made him chuckle. "You're talking to a preacher's son here. The Bible frowns on many things, and yet seems good on slavery and selling your daughters, so I'm thinking it's schizophrenic at best.”

“Have you ever thought what a God would be like who actually ordained and executed the cruelty that is in [the biblical Book of Revelation]? A holocaust of mankind. Yet so many of these Bible-men accept the idea without a second thought.”

“You're with me, Sadie. When you're off the clock, you're not my employee. You're my.. Air."I frowned at him. "Your air?"He grinned. "Well, girlfriend seems to be a shallow word for what I feel for you..”

“Maybe "Bible Belt" refers not so much to the popularity of the Good Book in these parts, but to the biblical-plague level of insects.”

“No, there's one thing the Bible makes clear: The biblical God is a sloppy manufacturer. He's not good at design, he's not good at execution. He'd be out of business.”

“I always thought the Bible was more of a salad thing, you know, but it isn't. It's a chocolate thing.”