“I don’t like anyone knowing anything about me that I didn’t choose to tell them.”

“Tell me about it. It’s so hard to deal with a single parent. They take out all their anxiety on you. It’s like,she’s so angry all the time. And I didn’t even do anything!”“That’s so wrong.”“Yeah.”“Where’s your dad?”“I don’t know. My mom had me when she was still in high school, so . . .”“You don’t see him at all?”“No, and I don’t want to. I have no interest in maintaining a relationship with someone who didn’t loveme enough to stick around.”

“I wasn’t about to tell him that I never said anything to anyone who teased me. I just went along with it like it was my joke too. I wanted everyone to like me…”

“I couldn’t tell them about Cross, I thought. I couldn’t tell them because Dede liked him and because she wouldn’t believe or understand it, and I couldn’t tell them because I myself was unsure what there was to believe or understand. It wasn’t like he’d kissed me, or made any declarations. What could I claim? For years and years, I felt this way, not just about Cross but about other guys – if they didn’t kiss you, it didn’t mean anything. Their interest in you had been so negligible as, perhaps, to have all been in your head.”

“Don’t take these from anyone but me or Shep. I don’t want anyone slipping anything in your drink.”

“I kissed his forehead. “You don’t have to thank me. I told you, I do anything for someone I care about.”He pulled away and looked up at me. “You said you do anything for someone you love.”I didn’t know how to respond to that. We were in such a precarious place. I didn’t want to say anything that might scare him away or let him know how I truly felt, because at the end of the day, I loved him. It was that simple. Instead I gave him a small smile. “I did say that, didn’t I?”