“You think money can solve any problem, but all it s good for is buying the things it can, and leaving you free to pursue the things it can't.”

“A gentle, quiet young man who might sit languid at her feet and read his verses to her or who might paint or draw her portrait. He would hold her hand and whisper how beautiful she was, how precious to him. Of course you mustn't play the pianoforte, he would say. Only silly females who have no higher accomplishments squander their strength on such an empty pastime. Dancing? No, that is far too fatiguing. May I sit beside you and fan you while you read?”

“Whenever did love have anything to do with deserving?”

“It's good to have money and the things that money can buy, but it's good, too, to check up once in a while and make sure that you haven't lost the things that money can't buy.”

“If a problem can be solved, there is nothing to worry about. If it can't be solved, well you can always buy chocolate :)”

“Money Can't Buy Happiness, but it can buy things that make you happy....”

“From the people who brought you "zero tolerance," I present the Gun-Free Zone! Yippee! Problem solved! Bam! Bam! Everybody down! Hey, how did that deranged loner get a gun into this Gun-Free Zone?”