“My vampires don't sparkle...they EAT people...in more ways than one!" *eyebrow wiggle*”

“Vampires,after all,don't sparkle.”

“Myth: Vampires don't eat. Truth: Try telling that to my uncle Mortey. ”

“You have to be more discerning, Lily, when experimenting with bondage." He wiggled his eyebrows. "I'd make a great master.”

“Where is your unit?" Murphy asked.I wiggled my eyebrows at her. "Right where it's always been, dollface.”

“Why don't you sparkle?"-"Because I live in the real world, where vampires burst into flames.”

“Sunset was only thirty minutes gone when some pissant vampire waylaid Deacon on his way to Theriault's. One of those younger shits who wrote poetry to Mother Darkness and thought becoming a vampire would make him sparkle.”