“I have never heard any of your lectures, but from what I can learn I should say that for people who like the kind of lectures you deliver, they are just the kind of lectures such people like. Yours respectfully, O. Abe.”

“People have now a-days, (said he,) got a strange opinion that every thing should be taught by lectures. Now, I cannot see that lectures can do so much good as reading the books from which the lectures are taken. I know nothing that can be best taught by lectures, except where experiments are to be shewn. You may teach chymistry by lectures.—You might teach making of shoes by lectures!”

“I know you so well, dragon king, you only get that particular look on your face when you're burning to give me one of your lectures.""Do I give you lectures ?""Oh, I don't mind. I think you're kind of cute when you do, and I don't really listen anyway.”

“My excuse for not lecturing against the use of tobacco is, that I never chewed it; that is a penalty which reformed tobacco chewers have to pay; though there are things enough I have chewed, which I could lecture against. If you should ever be betrayed into any of these philanthropies, do not let your left hand know what your right hand does , for it is not worth knowing. Rescue the drowning and tie your shoe-strings. Take your time, and set about some free labor.”

“I respect your beliefs Andrew, and I'm glad they make you happy. But I'm not up here to be lectured at or spoken down to. Clear?”

“And I’ll stop with the lecture now. I don’t like people much—they irritate and annoy me. But I’mfascinated by them anyway.”