“How many things do I have to invent in my head to survive this?”

“I don’t have enough gross words in my gross vocabulary to describe how gross that gross thought is. Gross.”

“Are there baby steps toward complete loserdom, and if so, how many are there to go?”

“Today I am in control because I want to be. I have my fingers on the switch, but have lived a lifetime ignoring the control I have over my own world. Today is different.”

“I wager that most human beings do five things a day they cannot logically explain.”

“I didn't have the time to slice a hundred shallow cuts into his lips and make him suck limes. I was too busy to make him swallow oiled musket balls. I had more important things to think about now and a lot to do. -Saffron in Dust of 100 Dogs”

“Look at that, Vera.”I tilt my head back and see a sky full of stars.“Can you tell which one is me?” he asks.I point to the brightest one.”