“Dress kinda tough-like ‘ya, I can handle toilets.’ Dress with authority over a toilet.”
“I want to publish a book on toilet paper—not only about toilet paper, but actually print it on toilet paper. That way nobody will be surprised by how shitty my book is.”
“You act like getting pregnant is a disease you can catch from public toilets.”
“A woman can be over dressed but never over elegant.”
“There's nothing special about losing your virginity over a toilet.”
“I hear phonetically on the phone. Toiletries sounds like toilet trees to me.”