“And what is the state but a servant and a convenience for a large number of people, just like the electric light and the plumbing system? And wouldn't it be preposterous to claim that men must exist for their plumbing, not the plumbing for the men?”

“You are confusing plumbing and love again.”

“An excellent plumber is infinitely more admirable than an incompetent philosopher. The society which scorns excellence in plumbing because plumbing is a humble activity, and tolerates shoddiness in philosophy because it is an exalted activity, will have neither good plumbing nor good philosophy. Neither its pipes nor its theories will hold water.”

“Sure as the most certain sure, plumb in the uprights, well entretied, braced in the beams,Stout as a horse, affectionate, haughty, electrical,I and this mystery here we stand.”

“...you have to laugh at the things that hurt you just to keep the world from running you plumb crazy”

“Men are easy,' he said, fingers tapping on his mahogany desk. 'A man's plumbing is like his mind: simple, very few surprises. You ladies, on the other hand...well, God put a lot of thought into making you.”