“Bragging about your compassion is the first step towards feeling a genuine emotion.”

“Self-awareness of one’s faults, far from being the first step to growth, is very often the second foot in the mud.”

“Don't drink away your dreams; drink towards them.”

“Dentistry is a precondition to love at first sight. When your eyes meet she beams with happiness, but when you smile back she shows her true reflexes.”

“First people lose their hair, then their vices, then their motivation. Then a toupee brings it all flowing back.”

“Sending love letters to first-graders will teach them lessons in cursive. But writing back will test their commitment.”

“Education: learning to find your purpose. Upon finding your purpose: what did I learn?”