“Experience: the vehicle of history. Teenagers: the driving force behind fatal accidents.”

“Cannibal: epicures who abstain from alcohol and tobacco. As moral guides, they are underutilized in the police forces of modern societies.  ”

“I don’t read biographies for moral instruction, or for a history lesson. I want to know what people are saying about me.”

“Spontaneous abortion: the opposite of immaculate conception. God has compensated for Christianity’s violent history by revealing that innocent blood does not have to be spilt.”

“Flatterers should be mistrusted, especially when they praise the dead. To seek a place in society is self-serving, but to seek one in history affects everyone.”

“Dentistry is a precondition to love at first sight. When your eyes meet she beams with happiness, but when you smile back she shows her true reflexes.”

“First people lose their hair, then their vices, then their motivation. Then a toupee brings it all flowing back.”