“I dropped out of school and congratulated myself for my diligence. Few realize how hard one has to work to resist the pressures of conventional success.”

“Just relax. Everyone around you is working too hard.”

“I get a lot of big ideas, and occasionally I actually come up with one myself.”

“I love working with my hands. My writing is rough, my paper bruised with ink stains.”

“I hope people of the future will remember my books for being burned, and I challenge an elite few to imagine the embers of the last copy.”

“When one's unconscious is full of vice, nothing realizes inner potential like hypocrisy.”

“The lampshade on my head is for my bright ideas. I won't be able to convey them until Monday, when my curtain gets out of the dry cleaners.”