“Spoilers followI started reading the third act of Hamlet, and I got about two pages in when I realized there's no point.I am never going back to school.I am never going to the university.I am never going to watch wolves stalk through the northern forests or elephants graze on the savanna. I am never going to have sex or get married or raise a family. I'm never going to have a first apartment, a first house, a first car. I'm never”