“Beer is proof that God loves us and wants us to be happy.[misquote of a letter about wine, see quotes/831031]”

“In wine there is wisdom, in beer there is Freedom, in water there is bacteria.”

“Were I a Roman Catholic, perhaps I should on this occasion vow to build a chapel to some saint, but as I am not, if I were to vow at all, it should be to build a light-house.[Letter to his wife, 17 July 1757, after narrowly avoiding a shipwreck; often misquoted as "Lighthouses are more helpful than churches."]”

“That bodies should be lent us, while they can afford us pleasure, assist us in acquiring knowledge, or doing good to our fellow creatures, is a kind and benevolent act of God - when they become unfit for these purposes and afford us pain instead of pleasure-instead of an aid, become an encumbrance and answer none of the intentions for which they were given, it is equally kind and benevolent that a way is provided by which we may get rid of them. Death is that way.”

“When nature gave us tears, She gave us leave to weep.”

“the eyes of other people are the eyes that ruin us. if all but myself were blind, I should want neither fine clothes, fine houses, nor fine furniture. ”

“While we may not be able to control all that happens to us, we can control what happens inside us.”