“I will take a serious approach to a subject usually treated lightly, which is a nerdy thing to do.”

“Before i launch into a discussion of what a nerd is and where the idea of nerds comes from, I'd like to diclose that when i was eleven, I had a rich fantasy life in which I carried a glowing staff.”

“You don't need to belong to any particular class or ethnicity to be a nerd, but some ethnic stereotypes are nerdier than others.”

“When Americans vote for a particular candidate, they vote for the candidate who reminds them of the kind of person they would have eaten lunch with.”

“I hump the wild to take it all in, there is no bag limit on happiness. ”

“I didn't invent the middle finger, but I perfected the use of it.”

“I don't like repeat offenders; I like dead offenders.”