“That's when I realized that part of me would probably always be lost in the past. That just seemed to be my personality: I was the one who couldn't stand change.”

“Now he would always be part of her. She just didn't know it yet.”

“How different would I be, if I'd never met him? Might I have had a normal dating life like my friends did, flitting from one guy to the next, never getting too serious or too invested in one while I was still so young? Who would I be if I hadn't endured the heartbreak of losing him & losing that part of myself that was built around him?”

“I had to work out that he was always going to break my heart as long as I was willing to let him in.”

“I'd never forgotten him, despite spending half my life trying to forget him. I'd given him everything: my love, my body, my pride, & parts of my heart & mind that I could never get back.”

“I was here, & now, but I was also swimming in the past, living these same motions we'd made so many times before.”

“God forbid, if something happened & she lost him for good, she would give up anything to have him back. Anything & everything.”