“But for my own example, I'd never believe one little kid could have so much brains!”

“I'd hate to have a kid like me.”

“Mom and dad say I should make my life an example of the principles I believe in. But every time I do, they tell me to stop it.”

“Calvin: I'm a genius. I can't believe how smart I am....I've got more brains than I know what to do with.Hobbes: So I've noticed.”

“Hold it. You know what I'd like to see? I'd like to see the three bears eat the three little pigs, and then the bears join up with the big bad wolf and eat Goldilocks and Little Red Riding Hood! Tell me a story like that, OK?”

“Calvin: Somewhere in Communist Russia I'll bet there's a little boy who has never known anything but censorship and oppression. But maybe he's heard of America, and he dreams of living in this land of freedom and opportunity! Someday, I'd like to meet that little boy...and tell him the awful TRUTH ABOUT THIS PLACE!!Calvin's Dad: Calvin, be quiet and eat the stupid lima beans.”

“I don't think I'd have been in such a hurry to reach adulthood if I'd known the whole thing was going to be ad-libbed.”