“Hobbes: Do you think there's a God?Calvin: Well, somebody's out to get me!”

“CALVIN: Hey, I got some mail! It's a Valentine card. HOBBES: From Susie Derkins!CALVIN: It says "Please be my Valentine." HOBBES: You're Susie's Valentine!CALVIN: I'm not her Valentine just because I got this in the mail, am I? Does the Post Master General know about this?HOBBES: Calvin and Susie, sitting in a tree-ee! Kay-eye-ess-ess-eye-en-gee!CALVIN: I don't have the KISS her, do I?! Is that what Valentines do??! Oh, gross!HOBBES: First comes lo-ove, then comes marriage, then comes a baby in a baby carriage!CALVIN: This can't be happening! I need a lawyer! She can't make me be her Valentine! HOBBES: Here she comes! Here comes Susie!SUSIE: Hi, Calvin.CALVIN: Get away from me! I'm not your Valentine! Take your card back! Eww! Girls! YECCHH!SUSIE: That card wasn't for YOU, you Moron. Didn't you read the back of the envelope? CALVIN: "Calvin, please give this to Hobbes." HOBBES?!HOBBES: Me? Really? Hot dog! Smooch City, here I come!”

“[Calvin and Hobbes are playing Scrabble.] Calvin: Ha! I've got a great word and it's on a "Double word score" box! Hobbes: "ZQFMGB" isn't a word! It doesn't even have a vowel! Calvin: It is so a word! It's a worm found in New Guinea! Everyone knows that! Hobbes: I'm looking it up. Calvin: You do, and I'll look up that 12-letter word you played with all the Xs and Js! Hobbes: What's your score for ZQFMGB? Calvin: 957.”

“Hobbes: What are you doing?Calvin: Being "cool."Hobbes: You look more like you're being bored.Calvin: The world bores you when you're cool.Hobbes: Look, I brought a sombrero! Now we can both be "cool."Calvin: A sombrero?! Are you crazy?! Cool people don't wear sombreros! Hobbes: What fun is it being cool if you can't wear a sombrero?”

“Calvin: Know what I pray for?Hobbes: What?Calvin: The strength to change what I can, the inability to accept what I can't, and the incapacity to tell the difference.”

“Hobbes: Jump! Jump! Jump! I win! Calvin: You win? Aaugghh! You won last time! I hate it when you win! Aarrggh! Mff! Gnnk! I hate this game! I hate the whole world! Aghhh! What a stupid game! You must have cheated! You must have used some sneaky, underhanded mindmeld to make me lose! I hate you! I didn't want to play this idiotic game in the first place! I knew you'd cheat! I knew you'd win! Oh! Oh! Aarg! [Calvin runs in circles around Hobbes screaming "Aaaaaaaaaaaa", then falls over.] Hobbes: Look, it's just a game. Calvin: I know! You should see me when I lose in real life!”